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Posted 10/14/2014 12:24 PM (GMT 0)
Sean- how're things going? Checking in with you. Sending you love & hugs my friend-

Lisa
Posted 10/15/2014 11:28 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Lisa & everyone,

Sorry the past few days have been pretty rough tbh and I am struggling to keep my head above water but I am still here. Consultant thinks I am feeling worse because of the decrease in Cymbalta but I don't know anymore, I feel so disconnected to my own mind right now and it is so scary. It is like being on the edge of a cliff and you can look down and see the bottom but you never know if you are going to fall off or not. I am about a week into taking Mirtrazapine 15 mg so maybe that will work soon but I just feel like a deflated balloon.

Sorry to go on about me, how are you feeling Lisa & anybody else who is reading this post?

Much love

Sean
Posted 10/23/2014 9:26 PM (GMT 0)
Hi How is everyone?

Lisa, Karen, Happy turtle & all the rest?

Hope you all okay???

I have been on 30 mg of Mirtrazapine for 5 day's now and the last 4 days have been so much more positive and this has given me alot more hope, I doubt the 30 mg kicked in that quick so maybe that is still to come but I do feel a lot better.

I really hope everyone is okay.

Hugs

Sean
Posted 10/23/2014 10:23 PM (GMT 0)
Sean- 4 days is huge! Thank you for getting back with us. Have missed you.

I'm doing ok. Had been having 3-4 week stretch of good days. Had some anxiety yesterday and today. Took xanax and felt ok. The DP/DR hasn't been around for a cpl weeks I don't think. It can take a hike and never show its face again as far as I am concerned!

Stay in touch. Miss you and wish you continued healing and hope.

Sending love-
Lisa
Posted 10/23/2014 10:39 PM (GMT 0)
So happy for you Sean. Keep up the fantastic work!!!

Hugs, Karen...
Posted 10/24/2014 7:30 PM (GMT 0)
I spoke too soon :( ....This morning I woke up and nearly had an anxiety attack out of nowhere but managed to talk myself out of it but I was shaken up and ever since then I have been feeling so spaced out and horrible. I think it is because of the increase in Mitrizapine which I went from 15 mg to 30 mg on Saturday just gone.

People normally always feel worse when they put the dose up before they feel better right?

Hope everyone is okay

Sean
Posted 10/24/2014 8:31 PM (GMT 0)
Yep- an increase in meds can absolutely cause increased anxiety and it'll subside. From all the stories I've read on here, it's not uncommon and ppl say it passes! It's unpkeasant but totally normal.

Cut yourself some slack. Did you take your anti anxiety med? I sure wish you could get some alprazolon- Xanax. It works so well for me anyway.

You did good talking yourself down. Don't get caught up in it. Renever, the more we pay it attention, the longer it festers. I know that's easier said than done but you must distract yourself- clean your room, put away laundry, do laundry, walk to a corner store and buy a snack, anything!

Still in my prayers Sean- every day. This crapoy season we've been in will end.

Sending love,
Lisa
Posted 10/24/2014 8:49 PM (GMT 0)
Hey Lisa,

Thank you for your reply....I was getting so exited the past few days as I felt good and then today it just hit me. I was taking the 15 mg tablets for around 11 days before I started feeling good but I felt bad before I felt good so perhaps its just the same thing now where I am feeling bad but when the 30 mg kicks in, I will feel even better than before I hope.

I took my clonzepam this morning as I could feel the attack happening but I just tried to relax.

Thanks for praying for me Lisa, I have to do a gig 2moro and its going to be so tough again :(

Are you okay?

Hugs

Sean
Posted 10/24/2014 9:07 PM (GMT 0)
Good luck with the gig Sean...

Have a good evening you two!!!

Hugs, Karen...

I just went up on my antidepressant. I hope I don't get anxiety... I don't think I will, I didn't last time.

But you never know. Lost all my medication this morning, after I got sick. Flu I think...
Posted 10/24/2014 9:13 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you Karen,

I pray that you dont any side effects from going up. My consultant put mine up after only a week of being on the low dose so he obv thinks I can handle them but right now I am feeling very out of sync and not connected hardly at all.

I am not giving up though no matter what I cannot give up. Sorry you are sick Karen.....make sure you wrap up warm okay :) x
Posted 10/24/2014 9:49 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks Sean, I will go to bed early. Been sleeping a lot today...

Hugs, Karen...

Don't ever give up Sean...
Posted 10/26/2014 12:14 AM (GMT 0)
Hey everyone,

How is everyone feeling today?

My DP has been so bad today, I managed to get through the gig but I felt like a zombie the whole way, only God know's how I got through today. I have a gig on Monday and Friday & Saturday next week so there is no let up. I keep thinking I am going to fall off the edge of the DP cliff but I still havent in over 8 months.

I now know I am stronger than I ever thought I was and although I cant say I am grateful for the experience, it has taught me that I can get through tough times alone.

I really hope you are all okay :)

Hugs

Sean
Posted 10/26/2014 2:47 AM (GMT 0)
Sean- I am so proud of you. In all of these months of struggling, I don't recall you ever canceling a gig despite feeling so weird and out of sorts. Even in your misery, you have carried on. You are an inspiration to me.

I still know you are going to heal from this. I truly feel that you not only are going to heal, but you are going to feel better than you did before all of this.

Sending you much love and prayers-
Lisa

Ps: Karen, sending you much love, healing & prayers too. Hang in there lady. We've got your back ♥️
Posted 10/26/2014 8:35 AM (GMT 0)
Hey Sean,

I agree with Lisa. You always take care of business even if you aren't feeling the greatest. We are both really proud of you. Hang in there buddy.

Lisa, thanks for the kind words. Not feeling too good today, maybe going to have to go to urgent care. I was hoping I was better.

Hang in there you two. We will conquer this together...

Hugs, Karen...
Posted 10/26/2014 9:08 AM (GMT 0)
HI. i am allover the place at the moment. not too worry. keep well and strong. thought i would pop by..........so i have popped, so bye.
Posted 10/26/2014 3:04 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks everyone, I think I only got one gig covered this year and that is out of about 50 or more of them so I am very proud of myself for that. I just feel so horrible right now, I am so disconnected from my own mind and you would think I would be used to that by now but it worries me every time that I am going to lose my mind when I am 99% sure that it is just the increase in dose of tablets.

I hate going on about me I am really sorry, just I cant seem to get past this right now but I will no matter what it takes. Karen are you okay now? Lisa how has your weekend been? Happy Turtle sorry you are all over the place right now :(

Hugs to you all

Sean
Posted 10/26/2014 4:23 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Sean,

I am feeling better today. I was kind of sick this morning. But now I am a lot better.

I am sorry that you are feeling disconnected. Maybe keep track of your meds (where you are at) and of your symptoms, maybe you can find a connection. I hope so. I hope it is just an increase of meds, it very well could be.

Take care and have a fantastic day...

Hugs, Karen...
Posted 10/26/2014 4:37 PM (GMT 0)
Hey Karen,

I am glad you are feeling better :) this makes me happy!

I am fairly sure it is the meds as I felt just as bad the same amount of days after I started these new tablets as I have the increase so if that is anything to go by, then I hopefully feel much better in the next couple of days.

I have another gig tomorrow but it is a local one so its a bit easier I guess.

Hope you enjoy the rest of your Sunday.

Hugs

Sean
Posted 10/26/2014 6:02 PM (GMT 0)
I wish you well with the gig tomorrow. And I wish you a happy Sunday too.

Hi Lisa, Hi Jamie...

Have a good day all!!!

Hugs, Karen...

I thin you are right about the medication Sean. I think it will be better in a couple of days. Keep hanging in there.
Posted 10/27/2014 3:18 AM (GMT 0)
have a great day and gig. monday afternoon here. us aussies take the lead!!! lol.
Posted 10/27/2014 4:45 PM (GMT 0)
Hey everyone,

Still feeling so zombified and have to do the gig tonight.....I have slept most of the day to avoid feeling bad but now have to get ready and go out.

Hope everyone is feeling okay.

Hugs

Sean
Posted 10/27/2014 4:54 PM (GMT 0)
You will do great at the gig. I hope you have a good time...

Hugs, Karen....
Posted 10/28/2014 12:46 AM (GMT 0)
Hey everyone,

So I got through another gig and with great feedback but I felt so disconnected its unreal, I am really having trouble dealing with this DP now and really hope its just the increase in tablets as I am exhausted now after having this constantly for 8 months.

If the first dose was anything to go by, I should start feeling some benefits in the next few days but I am really struggling right now.

Makes you think what have I or anything of us done to deserve this crap when there is all these bad people out there who seem to breeze through life.

I heard a quote once ..........if you are going through hell, keep going!
Posted 10/28/2014 4:15 AM (GMT 0)
"If you're going through hell, keep going." -Winston Churchill.

Brilliant quote & quite fitting for us this year.

Glad you got through your gig. I hope you've been able to relax and get some sleep by now.

I'm doing ok. Mostly good days but like tonight, have that weird, down, disconnect? feeling. I started taking Deplin last week along with the pristiq & lamictal. Deplin is a prescription folic acid tablet. It's supposed to help with depression. I'm to give it a month to see if it helps my moods before considering switching to a different AD.

Sending love and support!
Lisa
Posted 10/28/2014 8:45 AM (GMT 0)
Congratulations Sean!!! I am happy you did the gig. Things will get better...

Hugs, Karen...
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