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Struggling- Feeling depressed

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Posted 12/11/2014 12:46 PM (GMT 0)
I posted this late last night in the anxiety forum as well:

I've been feeling good for months. Since Sunday eve, I've been struggling with derealization off & on. I've had it off & on for awhile but it usually doesn't last more than a day. This time it's lingering.

It's not 24/7. Today/this eve I noticed I'm feeling depressed! No idea what's going on. Therapy is digging in deep but it's good., yet, still stirring up the dirt. The weather is changing too. I take vit D3 so I shouldn't be deficient.

It's so upsetting bc I've only had a few months of respite from struggling with a rocky many months.

I'm not having the anxiety I was having but I've been crying off & on today & am just very uncomfortable.

I just took a xanax in case it was anxiety. Sometimes when I've felt that gloom w/out physical panic, the xanax has helped.

I don't usually get depressed at the holidays either. Some sadness missing loved ones but usually the fun I look forward to with my family get together, trumps the sadness so I can't blame it on that.

My cycle was last week so I can't blame it on that either sad

Do any of you ever feel that gloom where you're just not comfortable for several days but are eventually able to snap back out of it? I'm just scared wahhhh shakehead

Thanks for listening!
Lisa
Posted 12/11/2014 12:55 PM (GMT 0)
sending many healing thoughts to you. keep strong, it will pass mate. does walking help with your anxiety or some form of activity. de-focus. de-focus, interesting word i think i have conjured. we are here for you.
Posted 12/11/2014 12:58 PM (GMT 0)
Yes walking helps! Just got out of the habit bc I was feeling good- oops. It's cold here but I we have a fitness center where we live so no excuses.

Thanks for the healing thoughts. I prefer to be the helper & not the helpee so thanks for your healing thoughts. Been sending them to you too. Defocus is an excellent term!

Hugs-
Liss
Posted 12/11/2014 1:52 PM (GMT 0)
How much vitamin D3 are you taking? I take 5000iu, 1000 wasn't enough... I had my levels checked and could see I needed more... Maybe that would help you...

I am sorry you don't feel good. I hope it passes. Even though some of us don't get depressed, the holidays can be overwhelming... Take a deep breath, and think happy thoughts. The sun is going to be out today, we have had so much rain that becomes depressing. I am happy to see the sun and blue skies...

Keep posting as it does help. I hope your day gets better...

Hugs, Karen...
Posted 12/11/2014 2:00 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks Karen! I take 5000 D3/day too.

One thing thats changed in the past 2 weeks besides digging up dirt in therapy, is my diet. I went back to low carb eating pretty diligently to keep losing weight. I remember when I started low carb 2 yrs ago, I felt low mood for a week or so. Hmmm. Maybe I need to eat a Reece Cup :-)

I just snowball the fear bc I haven't had enough time in between feeling good and my struggles this year, to build confidence. I get scared & think "I'm going there again or my meds aren't working."

Thanks for the alwsys loving and encouraging support ♥️

Lisa
Posted 12/11/2014 2:28 PM (GMT 0)
Oh I'm so sorry to hear this, but it seems as though you are a good detective in figuring out what may be the culprit. Funny, just before my celexa pooped out on me, I was following weight watchers and exercising. I wonder if speeding up the metabolism has something to do with how we process these meds? Did the xanax help? I sure do hope you feel better. Maybe this is an opportunity for you to practice some coping skills to prove to yourself that you have some control over this? That may help build some confidence in you? Thinking about you! You're a tough cookie, you can get through it!
Posted 12/11/2014 3:09 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks Coopsmom-

You're right about coping skills bc guess what- I've seriously neglected then as I've been feeling good for sometime. Not only am I going to pull them out & practice but I've started a book finally that's been gathering dust on my table called Hope and Help for your Nerves. It's already speaking to me!

Are you still struggling with your moods/adjusting to Effexor? Do you work? I've always worked when I've gone through this stuff before & I think that sped up my healing. Not working now so not having the distraction of work/something to do, has to be stagnating/delaying things in my opinion.

Love you guys!
Lisa
Posted 12/11/2014 6:07 PM (GMT 0)
If you stay on that low carb, increase your whole food veggies and fruits! Fruits have natural sugars, better than a Reeses!

We all go through this roller coaster ride, it is what we practice the coping skills for. Just keep working at it and the gloom will pass I promise.

Stray strong and safe
Peace
Trina
Posted 12/11/2014 6:10 PM (GMT 0)
Yep, changes in eating/exercise/sleep/daily activities can affect mood. Sometimes, it is nothing at all.

Inaction is, for me, a hard thing to overcome. It really makes me uptight and down. Most people do better with a schedule. A schedule focuses your body and strengthens your mind, becoming the distraction of choice. The day needs structure.

Even when I am off work, I try (and sometimes fail, but still!) to keep to some kind of schedule. Library day here, laundry day there, clean the house here, etc.

Do not talk yourself into jinxing yourself. "I am afraid it might not go away...." can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Don't let yourself go to the worst possible scenario. Stay in the moment.

Be well.
Posted 12/11/2014 7:18 PM (GMT 0)
Hey Lisa, I am still struggling but I'm not ready to give up just yet. I have always been working through all this mess. Even though I would dread the thought of going in, I was not going to let anxiety take that away from me. I can't say it's been easy but I needed to keep my life as normal as I could! I try to use my coping skills but with 2 active boys and work and house and all that, I sometimes forget to breathe!!
Posted 12/11/2014 7:24 PM (GMT 0)
Oh by the way, I have read that book many times! In fact it was the 1st one I purchased for myself over 20 years ago after my 1st experience with anxiety.

I've also purchased a newer version called essential help for your nerves that is more up to date. Amazing read actually! She really covers all of the weirdness that goes along with anxiety or as she calls it "nervous illness" Wouldn't it be amazing to have a psychiatrist like her??

Hope you're feeling better today!! Hugs
Posted 12/11/2014 11:45 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you friends!!! Love love love you guys!!

Coopsmom- I wish I'd have known about that book 20 yrs ago! I was 23 when I had my first experience with "nervous illness!"

I posted this reply in the anxiety forum too:

Tools belt is pulled out and coping tools getting spiffed up! No choice, I've been neglecting them, been on cruise control which has felt nice but unprepared for the curve ahead!

I'm going to bury my nose in the Dr Claire Weeks book tonight (Hope & Help for your Nerves). My bff called (the one that moved that I miss soooooo much), & we hashed out my issues. I wish she'd post on here, she has a magical way of making you feel better. Logical, intelligent, kind & crazy humor. Plus she's one of us lol & been there, done that with everything we have all struggled with.

I went to my neighbors to visit. I was supposed to get new tires today but didn't feel like sitting at the tire place for 2 hrs. My neighbors hubby (who totally reminds me of my dad, except he's black lol), offered to do it for me!!!! He refused to take any money from me for doing it so Matt & I are going to take them to dinner this week. Tires & alignment were $400. He finagled a free alignment. I figured that saved me $100 so I went to the mall & bought a $99 wristlet at Von Maur

I'm home now. Feeling better. Still off but I'm going to ride this wave. I could not easily do this without my friends here. Thank you all so much.

Love you guys!
Lisa
Posted 12/12/2014 10:16 AM (GMT 0)
remember. 'slow and steady wins the race'.
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