okay, been busy the last couple of days and severely sleep deprived. first yesterday i seen my gp. all numbers a.o.k he said i am, for me, medically fine. i was extremely buoyed by this. today had my shrink. an excellent session. i said i will back off a bit, he is glad that i have accepted that i am relatively stable. he wrote that to my gp. very considerate. he is aware of my excitement and shear terror of wellness, and he gets it. i have not known relative stability. i think the insanity sign is allowed to be ripped off in 24 hours time, lol. an interesting tid bit. my consultant psychiatrist is a professor and is a clinical director for hour hospitals drug and alcohol and mental health services. for the whole region. interestingly i found out today that he is a dean out our esteemed university and lectures the medical students. i have been invited, along with another individual to do a talk on mental health. it will be tv style, recorded as well. approximately 110 students, boy. my area will be self harm. i will get a taxi there and back and a payment for service. i don't think it will be a lot.
i am excited to promote and makes these soon to be new interns a little more clued up, so to speak. such eager young minds. 2 hours of it. i felt very reciprocated by my shrink. he says i am very interesting suject, basically as mad as hell. i said i will straight shoot, he affirmed that this is good. been up since 3 am. i know i haven't posted a lot, but i guess i will catch up. he said sept / oct, i have e-mailed him so he has mine and will in due course send me the particulars. i have been using my medical as a crutch, i could see the affirming in his eyes. basically he was saying about
expletive time.
you my friends have been a huge driver in my awareness and subsequent attunement and mind set change, as my fiance' puts it. i will still see my therapist, my shrink too but less. he said are you sacking me!! he sees me on the side. and he runs the hospitals full departments and lectures. he is amazing. less reflection for me, be in the moment, be as productive for today, listen to your mind and body. i love you all. many healing thoughts from this exhausted turtle. sleep maintence insomnia is a bugger. it is the inability to fall asleep and when stay asleep. very cruel. oh well. at least i know. see ya soon.