HealingWell
Search Close Search
☰

What's 'sick enough' to warrant therapy?

Support Forums
>
Depression
✚ New Topic ✚ Reply
❬ ❬ Previous Thread |Next Thread ❭ ❭
Posted 4/21/2015 7:44 PM (GMT 0)
Hi everyone,

I posted a few months ago about how to go about seeking help. My doctor recommended a therapy organisation, so I filled out a form, and they've finally gotten round to giving me an appointment next week. Three months later. I feel too much time has passed and I'm not prepared anymore.

The letter says to come in for an 'assessment' to be 'considered for the programme'. It sounds so scary, like a job interview. I'm so nervous. They're going to laugh at me, I'm not anywhere near sick enough to be wasting their time. I don't think my problems are important anymore, because I'm able to function and get out of bed and do some work and eat and stuff. I even volunteer and have friends. I wish I hadn't applied.

But then, even though my problems are mild, I still feel I need help with them. No motivation. Frequent thoughts of dying. Past 'traumas' are still haunting me - but I don't know if I can even call them traumas. It seems silly. Nobody physically hurt me, nobody close to me died.

I don't know. How did you guys know you were in need of therapy?
Posted 4/21/2015 8:36 PM (GMT 0)
I don't know honestly, but I'm thinking if you feel you need help of any kind you should seek it out....

I have been through a lot of emotional and physical trauma in my life and I've waited until now to finally seek help because everything from my past has come to head now and issues I have presently are also extremely stressful and painful so I'm now seeking therapy, been once so far and going again next Monday and hoping it will help.
Posted 4/21/2015 8:48 PM (GMT 0)
It would help to go. If you don't need it real bad, you can space your appointments out so you aren't going so often. But I think it couldn't hurt. So check it out...

Hugs, Karen...
Posted 4/21/2015 9:09 PM (GMT 0)
And what happens if you feel worse tomorrow?

Keep the appointment.

Not to be a downer, but I sought out help and had to wait three months. The psychiatrist started me on an anti-depressant, and referred me to counseling. Three weeks later, there was a death in the family, a very meaningful one to me. I was so glad I had a sort-of support network in place.

If there is one thing we can count on, it's that we do not know what is happening next. You do not want to get to a point where life becomes unmanageable.

Besides, you use the words, "No motivation. Frequent thoughts of dying. Past 'traumas' ... still haunting me." Stop belittling your feelings. They are valid, you are valid, and you deserve to feel better.
Posted 4/21/2015 9:49 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you so much for the replies.

pb4: It was really brave of you to get help and I hope it makes you feel better
Myself09: Thank you, that means a lot to me. Too often I invalidate my own feelings

I know I need help, but my main reservation is that I don't know if therapy is the answer. Maybe I don't need a therapist, but just someone to love and listen and care. I think I'll go to the 'assessment' and see what happens - if they think I don't need therapy then they'll tell me and that'll be the end of it.

I'm just really bad at saying these things out loud... They're going to ask my what made me seek help and what I want to gain from therapy and I just don't know how to answer these things :((
Posted 4/21/2015 9:52 PM (GMT 0)
I'm thinking it's sort of like being "a little bit pregnant"! Stuck is stuck. One of the best things I've found to help me is a different perspective.

I waited 3 months for my 'intake' appointment, then another month to actually see the psychiatrist. The day of the appointment, they tell me they had to reschedule and had tried to reach me. WHAT???? They were not calling MY phone number! I was given an appointment another 4 weeks away. I left the facility and came to the first traffic light. Make a right, and go home, practically suicidal OR make a left and pull into the emergency department? I made the left! After a few hours in the emergency psych ward and a nice long talk with a social worker, I was able to go home, knowing that I could stay with a friend if I felt bad again. The staff had an emergency meeting because of what had happened to me and they changed their protocol for situations like mine. Never know how things that happen to us will be put to use!

Keep the appointment. Unload there. Usually, what we are willing to acknowledge to ourselves and others in the beginning is only the tip of the ice berg. I sincerely hope you are able to work things out for a good outcome! Keep posting, let us know how things are going.
Posted 4/21/2015 9:54 PM (GMT 0)
Babe--Therapy might not be the answer, but it's a step in the right direction.

If you don't know what to say, then say that. A good therapist will help to draw out the trouble. Therapy isn't a test. It is an objective ear that hears what we say, doesn't judge, and tries to help sort through the 'stuff.'
Posted 4/21/2015 10:51 PM (GMT 0)
The therapist will listen and care. That is 2/3 of the way there. You learn to love yourself.

Do try... It cant' hurt anything as I mentioned before. It will help.

Do this for yourself, you are worth it.

Hugs, Karen...
Posted 4/22/2015 10:02 AM (GMT 0)
see it as a productive experience. you will know if it is for you or not. also the therapist may have further ideas that will be of assistance.
Posted 4/25/2015 1:03 AM (GMT 0)
M

welcome to the forum.

I hope you have or will go to the appointment. they will ask you many questions that will be very helpful. Be as honest as you can, you first answer that pops in your head is the right one.

There is not shame in getting therapy, sometimes we all need some professional help. These people are trained to listen and guide us to organize our thoughts and get emotionally balanced.

I see a therapist and find it is very helpful.

Please let us know how you are doing.
Peace
Trina
Posted 4/25/2015 1:08 AM (GMT 0)
Thank you malaika,

It's dreadfully painful to be this way and this is my last resort so I guess we will see.

I wish you well with everything.
Posted 4/27/2015 1:44 PM (GMT 0)
You were all so kind, I thought I'd let you know what happened.

I just got back from the assessment. I found it hard to just blurt out all my problems to a stranger so was a bit anxious and slow, and she looked at me in a way which made me feel I was wasting her time. She said 'I'm not sure you feel you want to be here'. I kept apologising for wasting her time, and I wish she would have reassured me that I wasn't, but she didn't.

I got talking a bit more though, and at the end she basically said my problems were too deep to be handled by their service, which offered short-term six to eight week counselling, and that she was going to write a letter to my GP recommending me to a mental health division. Thing is though I'm graduating soon so returning back home, and it takes some months to get referred, so that's not gonna work out.

I'm having a really bad day because I facebooked stalked my ex, which I knew would be a bad idea, and found out some upsetting things, and I don't know if I'm allowed to say this on here but I'm feeling really suicidal.
Posted 4/27/2015 2:05 PM (GMT 0)
M.

We can not talk about how you feel unfurnately. However, here are some numbers you can call, there is always a person at the other end of the phone that cares what you are going thru and will talk to you until you feel better. Please put the numbers in your phone so you have them ready to dial at anytime.

NDMDA Depression Hotline | Support Group. 800-826-3632

Suicide Prevention Services Crisis Hotline 800-784-2433

As you know, stalking your ex is a bad idea, leaves you open to more hurt. Suggestion here is to block her on your face book.

Do not loose hope, when you get home there is help you can get. NOT everyone is as cold as the person you encountered. I have met one or two. But the majority I have met have been encouraging, kind and compassionate, including my therapist and pyschiastrist that I now see.

You can even start looking for depression support groups NOW in the area you will be moving back to. Just search on line. I attend one 2 times a week. Hard to start attending, won't lie about that. But, once you get comfy with the group, it is invaluable to hear other people having the same struggles, seeing their faces and sharing how you each deal with the common problems.

Hang in there M, you are stronger than you know.
I wish you peace and strength
Trina
Posted 4/27/2015 3:30 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you Trina. Unfortunately I live in England so don't think I can call those numbers.

I am so tired and feel so alone, getting help is so much effort and I feel it is wasted effort, for nothing about me matters.
Posted 4/27/2015 4:01 PM (GMT 0)
Block facebook, period. Time to put on the "big-person pants." If you use the service to make yourself nuts, it's not worth it.

Go through with the letter to GP. It will work no matter where you are. Stop letting yourself down by saying it is too much effort and it will not be of much help. When we are depressed, we resort to self-sabotage.

Easy to do is NOT generally useful. It's just the default. It's always better to move forward, even if it is the wrong move.

You are worth the time. Stop listening to that voice talking you down. That is depression, and here we all know what it sounds like, and the amount of time and self-worth it steals.

If you feel as if you plan to hurt yourself, go to a hospital. Go to a doctor. Go to a friend. Go back to student services and say "I want to hurt myself."

And, please, you know how you are feeling is wrong and bad. You know it is not right. You can find help. We believe in you.
Posted 4/27/2015 4:08 PM (GMT 0)
One more thought. The student center person was not able to help at the moment, but she is helping you the best way she can.

She was not looking at you to indicate you were wasting her time. That, again, is the anxiety and depressing making the assumption that we, the depressed person, is ALWAYS WRONG. We aren't, no more than the usual person.

Every statement has an opposite, and opposite is just as likely to be true. Wasting time versus important engagement.

Please, be well.
Posted 4/27/2015 5:27 PM (GMT 0)

Myself 09 said...

She was not looking at you to indicate you were wasting her time. That, again, is the anxiety and depressing making the assumption that we, the depressed person, is ALWAYS WRONG. We aren't, no more than the usual person.

I think you're definitely right about this. It was probably just me being paranoid.

I just really wish I had someone to support me through all this. It would make the burden so much more bearable.
Posted 4/27/2015 5:46 PM (GMT 0)
M

Here are some help centers I found for the UK I hope they help you. Never, Never give up.

You are not alone, remember that.



Samaritans UK & ROI
National
Contact by: Face to Face - Phone - Letter: - E-mail:
Hotline: +44 (0) 8457 90 90 90 (UK - local rate)
Hotline: +44 (0) 8457 90 91 92 (UK minicom)
Hotline: 1850 60 90 90 (ROI - local rate)
Hotline: 1850 60 90 91 (ROI minicom)
Website: samaritans.org
E-mail Helpline: [email protected]
24 Hour service:


http://www.befrienders.org/directory?country=GB


http://news.bbcimg.co.uk/media/images/77051000/jpg/_77051399_77051394.jpg

National Suicide Crisis Hotlines

UK: 08457 90 90 90


I wish you Peace and strength
Trina
✚ New Topic ✚ Reply