Chronic depression

Are you seeing a therapist? Whenever my anxiety is preventing me from doing something I try baby steps. If I am afraid to go outside and walk around, I start by just walking to the front door, and keep trying until I can do it. Then another time I might open it and look outside. I dont put pressure on myself to do anything but just think 'lets see what happens'.

You aren't doing anything wrong, you are going through a really rough period in your life and depression comes along with anxiety in a lot of cases. I know its hard, so so hard, but you wont be like this forever. Things change, nothing stays the same forever, and you will eventually feel better. The road is hard, and you will have a lot of downs as well as ups. Recovering from depression when I first suffered it was a bit like 2 steps forward, 2 steps back, 3 steps forward, 2 steps back. I couldnt measure progress and just took it one day at a time, that's all we can do. I try even now not to think too much about the future and just take it one day at a time, because even thinking about going through what I'm going through now for another week makes me feel like its too hard. I'm in a bad place myself at the moment and every day is a struggle.

The only thing thats get me out of bed in the morning is routine. I have a very simple and repeatable routine which I do every morning and it seems to help. I get up at the same time every day, go take my medicine, then go and sit in bed for 30 minutes and do relaxation exercises. Then I go and have breakfast then sit on the couch and play games to take my mind off the nausea and pain that comes from breakfast. I shower 60 minutes later, then do more relaxation exercises. It is just habbit for me now and doesnt require much effort, the effort comes from suffering through the nausea and pain throughout the day and the low mood which makes me want to end it all :(