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Posted 12/11/2015 1:03 PM (GMT 0)
I just got done writing out the check for my car insurance. A whopping $2.49 left in my checking account and Christmas is 2 weeks away. I know I can't change this. I know my family understands. Still, I hate this! It makes me feel so defeated.

I know that Christmas isn't about the presents under the tree. It just puts it in my face that I do not work. I cannot work. I am stuck on this lousy limited income for the rest of my life.

I'm tired of it. Tired of the pain. Tired of the comments about people on assistance being lazy, lumping the truly disabled in with the 'leeches'. Tired of having to defend myself. Tired of having to claw my way back out of despair. Tired of having to wear the "Happy Face" mask when around other people this time of year.

Let me have my Bah Humbug moment, for crying out loud!
Posted 12/11/2015 3:34 PM (GMT 0)
I remember a Christmas .50 cent in the checking a week before the holiday. Car broke no money. dble shifts at the Casinos to get money, people called out, ended up not going anyway, send presents late.

It is what it is Pitmom. Roof over your head, food on the table, heater working, hugs for the ones you lover.

Gather them round, make popcorn from cornels in the bag in the pot on the stove and Read the kids! Memories are better then toys. They just don't know it yets.

Love, Peace and hugs
Trina
Posted 12/11/2015 4:20 PM (GMT 0)
I am in the same boat too this year. Was able to get the youngest grandchildren a gift, but that is it. I am trying so hard to be happy anyway. I know, it isn't easy. I guess we do have to count our blessings.

Hugs, Karen...
Posted 12/11/2015 10:31 PM (GMT 0)
Sorry to hear, pitmom, about your stress during this season. It is really hard when we know that some situations,(like not being able to work), will never change. I don't know about you, but there are times that I just feel overwhelmed, and yes, very, very tired. Keeping that "Happy face" mask on is exhausting.
I hope that you can keep posting here and get some relief from at least talking freely about your frustrations.
Being on a limited income is really hard. You can feel good about yourself that you can budget and are able to cover your car insurance.
Posted 12/12/2015 6:02 AM (GMT 0)
keep strong. this world is slowly becoming void of compassion.
Posted 12/12/2015 10:42 AM (GMT 0)
I realize today that I spent almost no time outside in the sun yesterday. I also realize I haven't gotten my full spectrum lamp out of storage yet. I am taking my vitamin D though. These emotional speed bumps come and go. I need to use everything in my arsenal to fight.

My daughter gave me a really nice back rub last night and I was much more comfortable for sleep. I've been waking long before sunrise for the past couple of weeks.

She and I are very open about what state of mind we are in so we can take whatever steps may be possible to mitigate any contributing issues.

Thank you all for responding. Those who saw my point, and those that missed it. It's just nice to know I was heard.
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