Too ugly for anything or anyone.

I'm solely doing it for the isolating, as my grandfather has already past away and my grandma spends most of her final days in the city with my aunts and uncles. I don't plan on making any face to face human interaction anymore.

I do not know how old you are, but women can be very mean. I think a guy who takes care of his grandparents and will own a nice farm one day is a pretty good catch. I doubt you are anything out of the ordinary as far as looks go, these girls are probably trying to make themselves feel better by putting someone else down. That makes them very ugly. Are these people from online? People on the internet are very quick to judge and they will say anything without thinking. I go through phases were I feel bad about myself too. I think it's good to get involved in an activity you enjoy. Volunteer, work with animals, take extra hours at work, paint, bicycle, cook... Whatever it is you enjoy. Interestingly enough, when we are doing things we enjoy, we are more desirable to other people. You also might meet someone on one of these missions. Just try to be happy individually. That will lure people to you.

Had a strange thought for you while on the treadmill this morning... if moving is a viable solution, why not move somewhere where the ratio between women & men is high? I mean, where there are lots of women and few men.

Just a stupid random thought to help level the playing field. If there are fewer men the women will be forced to look at what matters rather than judge on surface appearance.

Alex dude, you'll be living the dream man, you'll be living the dream.

If this was a hundred years ago, people would call you a hermit; today they'll just think you're mentally ill. What evs. We can't all be good at hanging out with other people.

No advice for you, man, cuz I suck at giving it and you suck at taking it. That said, remember to pay your taxes, you don't want The Man taking your farm away.

On the other hand, life is a whole pile easier when you have people around. If you can figure out a way to be comfortable around humans again you'll likely be better off.

To be fair, 7 years of bullying would destroy most people's confidence/self-esteem. Only to most people it happens when they are at school. How old are you? What dating sites have you tried? I'm just finding it hard to fathom that there are hundreds of girls which have told you straight out that you're ugly and not worth their time. Women have many faults, but for most of them sheer, brutal honesty isn't one of them. Are you positive they're not saying something blander, which you're interpreting to mean that you're hideously ugly and you should crawl into a ditch and die? Paranoia isn't a pretty thing; we see insults and malicious intent everywhere.

Here's where I'm going to be a bit blunt, but not about your looks: nice guys overrate niceness. Sure, it's a nice quality to have but anyone can be nice - it's a tad, how can I put this, boring? *********
You don't have to go from one extreme to the other, nor should you. You can be a basically polite and decent person without being a doormat. If your female friends treat you like crap, don't grin and bear it. If they whinge interminably but aren't interested in your problems, then stop listening to their interminable whinging.

I don't think you should cut yourself from all human society. A few hardy souls can bear total isolation, but there is a reason why solitary confinement is considered torture in most civilised countries. I think you ought to take a break from dating, avoid dating sites and Tinder, and just try to meet a few new people - including females - as friends. For females, avoid the trap of being friends with them but secretly hoping to sleep with them. If you really do fancy somebody too much to just be friends with them, then they're not friendship material. You can't fancy literally every woman you meet, so try to find female friends that you don't fancy.

I hope this does help a little bit. I know the feeling of not feeling wanted, and it is a horrible one.

Post edited for graphic content

Post Edited By Moderator (BnotAfraid) : 5/9/2016 8:56:02 AM (GMT-6)

What did I say that was graphic in my last post?

Also I find this line to be unacceptably judgemental for a supposedly 'supportive' depression forum: Where some members tend to negative and like to mire in their muck, most of us to chase the light. I'm also positive it's a reference to me (and probably other people too, but I'm not sure who).

I have absolutely no doubt this post will get removed, so I will screenshot it to have a record of it.

PS: I'm actually going through one of the hardest times of my life I've ever been through at the moment and Trina's comment was almost like a physical slap in the face when I read that. My instincts not to trust this board have been justified - if ever I was tempted to post about my problems on here, that temptation has now been utterly removed. I will find a less cliquey, more supportive place of 'outsiders' than this board. Maybe I'm overreacting but if there is one thing in life I have learnt, it's that your gut instinct tends to be the correct one. Not always, but mostly.

Post Edited (NiceCupOfTea) : 5/9/2016 10:23:25 AM (GMT-6)

I feel like that picture is scarily true, tbh =/

I seem to be too depressive or too angry for most forums.

I would add that most people will internalize their pain or sadness or hurt, and feel rejected. This can happen even when there was no rejection at ALL.

I routinely will blow many things out of proportion, which really mangles your point of view of the world. There is a thing as neutral. I would agree that very few people would be outwardly so cruel as to just be so blunt.

Stop looking and just be for a bit.

I feel I am weird too, so you aren't alone...

The world is full of so many types of people that I really don't think that there is a weird anymore.

Yes, fight the feelings. Because honestly you are not weird. We tend to compare ourselves to others which isn't fair to us. I have done that a lot in my life. Now I pretty much don't care. I guess it is my age.

Hang in there NCOT. We really are here for you too.

Hugs, Karen...

Thanks Karen. Sincerely...

There was a time when I did start caring less about what others thought. It was actually rather freeing and I would love to be able to go back to that, but it doesn't seem to be an easy thing to do. Maybe if I could get out of my parents' shadow (it's a long story - a very, very long story), it would become easier again.

@Myself - Yes, I think women are more prone to feeling self-conscious about their bodies than men. So many of them disparage themselves for being too fat, for example, when they are genuinely not even overweight - they're just not absolutely rake thin is all. It's pretty sad, really.

NCOT I edited the line where you stated Alex was either good or extremely bad.

Not bad, the bad was not proper for the forum.

And like all members, MODS are allowed their opinions.

Look inside yourself for where your anger is truly coming come.

I wish you peace.

I wish you calmness and peace.

I AM LOCKING THIS THREAD. AS STATED IS HAS BEEN HIJACKED. ALEX FEEL FREE TO START ANOTHER THREAD WE ARE HERE FOR YOU TO LISTEN AND SUPPORT

Trina