Posted 8/28/2016 5:04 PM (GMT 0)
I just joined this forum after having read several posts on it with stories I could relate to. My biggest fear is life without SSRIs, despite the horrendous side effects I experienced while on Lexapro and Zoloft. I’m currently taking 150MG of Zoloft and suffer from the following side effects:
Extreme lethargy — I used to be a morning person who’d get up at 5am without an alarm. Now, I may get up at 5am, but I keep hitting that alarm over and over and over again until the last possible moment I can stay in bed without being late for work. (Although there have been numerous times that I’ve been late to work anyway.)
Chronic inactivity — For the past 9 months that I’ve been on Lexapro and Zoloft, I haven’t cared enough to change my clothes, wash my face, and brush my teeth before bed. No joke. I just pass out in my street clothes and wake up dreading having to brush my teeth and wash my face the next morning. There’ve been times where I’ll just wear the same outfit to work that I did the day prior. Before SSRIs, general hygiene and the changing of clothes was no issue whatsoever. I am (or was) addicted to running and have been doing so since I was 12 years old. I ran a marathon a few years back and routinely ran 3-5 miles, 3-4 times a week. Now, I run maybe once a month, if that. I ran 2 miles with my friends last week, and stopped twice because I was so out-of-breath and out-of-shape. The thought of even WALKING pains me. Which leads me to —
Major weight gain and appetite — I am a 41-year old female who used to be 5’2” and 98 lbs. Now that I’ve been on SSRIs, I’ve put on 38 pounds and counting. While I may have been underweight before, now I’m heading in the opposite direction. My food cravings (especially for carbs and sweets) are insane. I find myself buying a lemon cake slice from Starbucks, sitting down to eat it at work, then throwing half of it in the trash knowing I really wasn’t hungry (and Starbucks lemon loafs aren’t the most healthiest food out there). BUT. 30 minutes later, I’ll go through the trash to find that lemon loaf and eat the rest of it. Then I’d go on auto-pilot back to Starbucks for another one. The cravings are terribly chronic and uncontrollable (again, I know how to be healthy as evidenced from life pre-SSRIs). So bad that I’m on Ritilan, which often causes loss of appetite, but the SSRI usage completely cancels that out.
Trouble concentrating — Perfect example. I’m at work now, and what have I been doing? Reading SSRI forums (and writing this novel of a post!).
Intense night sweats — I wake up in the middle of the night, drenched in sweat. We’re talking sheets soaked through to the mattress.
Sexual apathy — I’d go for days (if not weeks) caring little about having sex. And when I’d have sex, I’d have trouble with getting turned on and would need to use lubrication (something I’ve never needed in the past). Orgasming wasn’t a problem, but I didn’t care enough to want one.
With all of these side effects, one might wonder — why the hell am I still on SSRIs???
Because the thought of being suicidally depressed (I’ve been hospitalized) and chronically anxious again (I used to pop Xanax like candy) terrifies me.
I’ve noticed that the Lexapro was FAR better combatting anxiety than the Zoloft has been. However, my psych put me on Zoloft because the food cravings were so terrible on Lexapro.
My question to this forum is: Are there any SSRIs you’ve taken which DON’T cause the above-referenced symptoms? I’m currently taking 150mg of Zoloft, 15mg of Abilify, 80mg of Ritilan, and 300mg of Wellbutrin. I’ve been on numerous other chemical cocktails over the years, and this one — aside from the SSRI side effects — seems to work the best. I tried Celexa a decade ago, but the depression/anxiety was still an issue after a year of being on it.
I’m seeing a new psych this week. I plan to tell her everything. And pray that I can get back to a modicum of my former self.
Any suggestions/comments regarding my post would be greatly appreciated. So many thanks in advance…..