Just holding on!

Hi there CheerDad

Put your foot firmly on the brake pedal..and take two steps back..hmm let me see..

Ex wifey can probably be handled by pretending (for a while) not to react to whatever she says that really gets you down or winds you up whatever the case might be!...Once these sort of people realise that they are not having any effect on you they quickly lose interest and go and pick on someone else..this works trust me, and after the first couple of times you ignore the taunts and button pushing you no longer have to pretend ~ and you find that you really couldn't care less after all lol

As for pleasing everyone - forget it lol..sheesh that's way too exhausting..not enough hours in the day for that job..and it's impossible! Sounds to me like it's time that you started pampering yourself a little..distract yourself from needy people in your life and try out a new hobby or challenge that's gonna make you feel good!

Take good care.

Maree

Hi Randy,  I just wanted to lend my support to you.  I have been going through a tough time myself the last month so I can relate in a way.  It always seems like a constant battle or struggle with depression and the slightest interuption or imbalance in life can disturb any kind of peace we have sought for ourselves.  That is the worst kind of irony I think to having this disorder.

You have worked so hard to get where you are now and working on resolving the issues with your divorce.  It is always going to be difficult as you carried a lot of the guilt for it, dont let your ex's anger and resentment pull you down with her.  This is most likely the kind of response that she is looking for as she knows that she can get it from you and that she can pull your strings in this way and the only option that she has to control whatever the situation may be.  Your a strong man and have worked very hard to put the pieces of your life back together.  Dont let her tear them down, dont let her tear you down.  You know we are always here for you.

Hi Randy
I also want to lend my support here.
UGH at exs!!!! I have been divorced for 6 years now,and I ended up having to move to another town because of my ex husband. He was a total control freak during our marriage,and that did not end when I divorced him.It got so bad that when I moved to my apartment that freak moved 2 blocks away! Which gave him better access to me and to know what I was doing.
When I started dating 2 years later,he would find out thru my kids that I was going out that night,and find an excuse to just show up when my date was picking me up. It was bad.
And if you have kids with them,it just makes it worse.
Since I have moved and gotten stronger,I now have no contact with him.My kids are 19 and 17 and if he needs to talk to me he either sends an email or tells my kids.
I don't know what your ex wife is putting you thru,but you might have to come to a point to where when she contacts you it is strictly about the kids,and it is on YOUR terms only.

Good luck with this!!!!

Shy

Randy, I will admit that it has been a while since I have followed your story. From what you have told us about your ex she seems to me to be a bully. Bullies really are cowards at heart. They try to make themselves look strong by tearing someone else down. Instead of handling their own anger they take it out on someone else. The thing about bullies though is that it is all for show. You don't have to give into the way she makes you feel.

I think JordaNZone is right about "Ex wifey can probably be handled by pretending (for a while) not to react to whatever she says that really gets you down or winds you up whatever the case might be!...Once these sort of people realise that they are not having any effect on you they quickly lose interest and go and pick on someone else..this works trust me, and after the first couple of times you ignore the taunts and button pushing you no longer have to pretend ~ and you find that you really couldn't care less after all lol"

You are strong and smart and caring. That will always serve you better than the effect any cowardly bully can have on you. Stay Strong,

Randy,

How are you doing today?

Thoughts and prayers are with you,

Good for you Randy!!!
I think you will find that life will be a little easier without hearing her voice on the phone!
You have put her in her place,now lets hope she continues that!

Shy

Good to hear that you are standing up for yourself Randy. Refusing her calls etc is a good thing......you really shouldn't have to deal with her behaviour . Take care of yourself.

Yay, Randy! Good on ya, referring your ex to your lawyer. I hope that cuts down on the "static" coming from her.

zinniagirl