Been very depressed

I am writing here because i need some help. Five years ago my mother had got into a bad depression i was 15 at the time she was soo depressed that she took her own life. Two years ago i had a very bad anxiety attack and it put me into depersonalization, i have had a anxiety disorder ever since that one attack, with having anxiety i am constanly worried about my mental health and just about everything, my thoughts are very out of wack, i fear i am going to loose control, but for the past couple of weeks i have been thinking of how depressed she must have been in order to take her own life, i have been feeling very depressed for about a month now and i fear that i will get as depressed as my mom was, i fear that the cause of my death will be suicide, i'm not suicidal at all so you don't have to worry but i just fear that it might happen one day..it just makes me depressed to know that depression can actually make someone take there own life.....last sunday i was sitting on my couch with bad anxiety and i started thinking and thinking untill i felt myself sinking into a depressed dark state of mind when i got up and walked around i felt differen't, i felt heavier i felt sick....Im 20 years old i have really good things going for me in my life but this fear is taking over me.....can anyone please tell me what i should do?....i don't want to go on meds i try to stick with the nature source....i just am feeling sick...any positives would be just great...

Thank you

Mike

Hey Mikey,

 

I have no grate words of wisdom for you but I do have gratitude.  I have a 15 year old daughter and my depression has been real bad lately but your courage to speak out gives me reason to hold on.  Your reminder that I need to be here for her is very timely and appreciated.  They say “if we can only help one person” well brother you just did that.

 

I have dealt with my depression my whole life and meds help most the time specially when I take them.  Your desire “to stick with the nature source” is admirable but there is nothing wrong with having a back up plan.  Do not limit yourself.  Research and open your mind to other alternatives and again, have a back plan.

 

Again thank you again and.

 

Be happy.    

Hi Mikey,

I am 22 so I can relate to how you feel to a certain degree. I am really sorry to hear about you mum. This is something I cannot image being so young so all I can do on this level really is offer my support and my ears. If you are really worried, you should see a doctor. You can explain to him that you are not interested in AD's if you want. Its your right as the patient. But there are other forms of treatment for depression & Anxiety out there than pills. The number of psychological treatments are huge and growing all the time. Again, this is something your doctor will be best able to advise you on.  There are also a number of natural treatments for depression that come in a pill form. Chinese herbalists are usually your best bet for advise there... but be careful to make sure you seek advide from a herbalist who is QUALIFIED!

Hopefully this will give you a starting point alongside what Haapy has said. Take one day at a time and dont try to rush yourself.

Darren