Hi, my name is Sassy, I've visited here before. This is the most distressing thing happening to our son and girlfriend affecting the whole family. Last time on here I talked about
our son who suffers with dystimia (chronic depression) & was into some light drugs and I couldn't deal too well. Now his Bipolar girlfriend is pregnant, due at Christmas and has not and will not tell her divorced parents who basically abandened her for other spouses & their children. Her mother suffers from Bipolar too.
So, both are 18, both are extremely selfish, highly intelegent, and extremely immature. They think they are keeping this child. She does nothing ( except tell my son what to do ) and expects to be housed and fed by him (us). We can hardly talk to them, because they go into angry or crying or baby like fits. I understand this condition somewhat, as I suffer from mild depression and do well on anti-depressants. I feel sorry for her, as her Dad, whom she was living with, didn't give a *** that she spent every night at our house. We told her this couldn't continue, but they did it anyhow.
She is off her meds now, and between the pregnancy hormones and bipolar, its hard to approach her. Our son is the same. He needs counciling or cognative therapy, but denies it. So...how can we help him (them)??? I fear, the baby will be the biggest loser. From what I understand, people with depression, & bipolar, often do not have a maternal instinct. They are so focussed on themselves, that the child will suffer. I mentioned Hope Adoption, and was told I was trying to manipulate them. I see it as her manipulating him, as she did not want to move out of town with her father, became pregnant and hence our son carries it all on his shoulders.
I needed to get this out there, so sorry for the long post. I know we do not want to have to raise another child now, and feel it is their responsibility to do so. But I feel they are incapable of doing it.
Does anybody have any advice on this? What and how can we approach these kids? If you are Bipolar, do you have any things to help us understand how she may be thinking?
Sassy--greiving grandma to be.