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Posted 8/28/2007 4:06 AM (GMT 0)
I can't go to sleep cause I just don't want another day to start. I don't want any tomorrows. I'm not thinking of self harm...but i really wouldn't mind if I didn't wake up in the morning. I haven't been this Depressed in years. My medications are not working. I stopped taking one of them 5 days ago because I'm just not getting any better. When do things get better? Why do I have to remind myself to breathe? I am just so tired of this and I want it to stop.
Posted 8/28/2007 4:56 AM (GMT 0)

Heather,

I am sorry you are having such a tough night.  I'm glad you have found this forum.  I think that after a while, you will find that you will get to know some of the members and feel like you are a part of a big family.  We all try to be here for each other.

Are you seeing a therapist?  If so, do you think you should get in touch with him/her to let them know that what you are doing is not working for you right now?  Most of us have email addresses listed if you need to contact us other than posting on the forum.

Please stay in touch and let us know how you are doing.

Take care!

Carla

Posted 8/28/2007 11:45 AM (GMT 0)
Heather
Welcome to the forum,I too am very glad that you found us and I am sure you will find the support that you are looking for.

I think it is time to get back into the doctor and let him know the meds are not working. This is frustrating but normal,it took my doctor 4 or 5 tries to get the right med combo to work for me.
Also as Carla suggested,trying to get in to see a therapist.

Please stay strong and keep us posted.

Shy
Posted 8/28/2007 12:17 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Heather and Welcome to HealingWell!

As Shy and Carla have suggested, you need to see a doctor about your meds if they are not working and talk therapy is a great way of start the healing process. I would not recommend stopping any meds without seeing a doctor as it can make things worse.

Please understand that we are all here for you and will give you what ever support we can.

Be Strong

Darren

Posted 8/30/2007 2:50 AM (GMT 0)

Thank you for your support. Yes....I'm seeing a therapist and I also have a pdoc. I've been seeing them both for almost 2 years. I stopped the med on my own....which I know isn't a good thing. But it wasn't working, and my pdoc doesn't listen to me. I've been more impulsive the last few days, and not thinking too clearly...probably because of the med. I haven't been able to go to work this week because everything just seems too stressful. I've been having more panic attacks than usual. I can't seem to get them under control. All the techniques I've learned in therapy are not helping. I just feel alone. I look forward to becoming part of your support group here.

Heather

Posted 8/30/2007 4:40 AM (GMT 0)

Heather,

Did you just stop your medication cold turkey or did you wean yourself off.  You know that could have something to do with the way you are feeling.  If you feel your doctor doesn't listen to you, why don't you ask your therapist to recommend someone else, but I think you need to see someone soon before you feel worse.  You just have to find the right medication that works for you.

Please know we are here for you and let us hear from you so we will know how you are doing.  You can usually reach one of us by email if you need to also.

Hugs!

Carla

Posted 8/30/2007 4:37 PM (GMT 0)

Hello Heather,

I know we met on the A & P forum and again your received wonderful support here. Please listen to the wisdom in the posts here and be very careful re stopping your meds on your own. 

Take care.

Posted 9/1/2007 5:31 AM (GMT 0)
Thank you.

I stopped the med cold turkey. It just wasn't working. And I had been on it for over a year. I was just fed up with everything. I told my tdoc that I was going to quit all of them....and she suggested that I wean myself off of one instead of cutting them all out. She's not the one who prescribed them....my pdoc is. She just didn't want me to stop them all at once because that could be bad. But she knew I was determined to cut back on them....so I agreed that i would at least give her suggestion a try. I'm glad I did cause I'm feeling a little better. The first few days after stopping the Trileptal...I felt awful. But today and yesterday I'm feeling better. I hope this lasts. This past year has been really bad for me.
Posted 9/1/2007 12:31 PM (GMT 0)
Heather

Is there anyway that you can get back into the doctor and soon? If you do not feel that she is listening to you then you may need to find someone else that you feel comfortable with.

It is not a good idea to stop cold turkey like that. The withdrawals can be very hard to deal with. And it does sound like you need something.

Please keep us updated.

Shy
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