Roid rage

I saw my dr Monday and he prescribed Prednisone for TMJ and the rest of my flared arthritis, I took it once. I picked up my monitor, my desk, surround sound and tower by the monitor cord, before dropping it all on me. Needless to say, my desk top is dead, I look and feel as though I've been beaten with a bat. I called my dr Tues, he suggested that I take the Zanax he also prescribed at the same time I take the steroids, my husband stopped talking to me for two days. I called on Wed and told the dr I simply could not take the prednisone anymore, and that for future refrence, it might not be the best idea to prescribe steroids to a person with anger management problems and a just diagnosed anxiety disorder. I try to joke about it now, having turned into a mini redheaded Hulk, but it hurts to know that the pain I'm in now, I caused myself, I lost years worth of pictures that have no hard copy. Less important, though still aggrivating, I lost my Sims 2 games and World of Warcraft, my stress releavers. At least we have a laptop so I'm not going completely crazy. But I know I'm going through something emotionally, drained and sick and tired of this situation, no money, no prospects of money, my house is a mess and falling apart.
The best part of the last week, today was my son's 5th birthday, I did my best to keep everything inside and make sure he had a good day and I think I did, he wore himself out and was passed out in my bed by 8:30pm
I just want to find a deep dark hole, scream myself hoarse and beat my head against the wall until I'm unconscious and don't have to deal with any of this mess anymore.

Sry it's so long guys, I just needed to vent to someone who understands more of what I'm going through than anyone else.

mrscavbar, You go ahead and vent all you need to, that is what we are here for. We all have our bad days and just need to get it out to feel better. I'm so sorry that you are going through so much, and we all do things that we know we shouldn't. I tried taking prednisone and i had to stop because it made me sick. atleast you know you can't take prednisone any more. All we can do is ,do the best we can and take one day at a time . I hope things get better for you, and remember we are here for you any time.

Tressia

Lola, I hate Prednisone, too.  When I was diagnosed with auto immune inner ear disease, they put me on 80 mg a day for one month to see if it would stop the progression of the disease.  The first couple of days I pretty much landscaped my front yard!  Then it hit!  I got sicker and sicker.  It was shutting down my immune system.  It didn't help with my hearing problems and it took me 4 1/2 months to be weaned off of it.  So, I too avoid that.

 

I'm sorry about your computer.  Perhaps the things are not lost.  Maybe if they repair it, the pictures and games will still be on it.  I'm not computer savvy but I hope that is true.  I bet you'll start backing up things from now on.

 

I hope you start feeling better.  Stay warm and try to relax.  You know what stress will do to you.  Tell your son Happy Birthday from me, okay?

 

Sherrine

I can totally relate to the reactions to meds. I did Med paks and got so sick I missed a weeks work. Believe it or not predisone
is one of the very few things I don't react to. For me I use it for voice loss. I used it for so many years that I could tell when the
voice was going to stay stable. Luckily I never had to take it for more than a week. I finally found Yucca Root which is a
natural steroid without the side effects that seem to go along with the reg roids.

Hope things get better. I know what it's like to lose so much info. I had family historys back 3 generations when my man lost
it all on me. Good luck...
Nana Monster

Update:
On Sunday my son and I traveled 3 hrs to my grandparents, where after the party, I collapsed, my mother and step father had to pick me up. I then had a total and complete meltdown. My mother drove us home, 4.5 hrs in the opposite direction of her home. Monday morning on the way to the grocery store I stopped at an intersection facing a lake, while stopped I wondered what it would take to get my mini van over the curb, through the fence and into the lake. Instead of going to the store I promptly drove to the nearest mental health clinic and got a psych eval. I had my first therapy session Tuesday morning, weekly therapy and anti-depressants and possibly anti-psychotics as well as someone to come to my house a couple times a week and help me clean and do the things I cannot do and help with my disability case are the plan for now. My therapist asked me to start at the begining, which meant I had to go back 22 yrs, and as I sat there and talked and talked and talked, I realized just how much I had gone through and how much of it I still carry with me and that though most of the people that hurt me are no longer in my life, they still affect my life. And I also realized, as I have survived all this &^%$#$ that I do this too, and now I have the best motivation in the world to do so, my son.
My entire family, including my husband, who my mother thought would balk at the suggestion, is willing to go to sessions with me, they say "Whatever it takes" and for the first time, I believe they mean it.

Also, I must say it, if you're like me, and was living a life, a successful life, then one day BAM!! you're so sick and so tired and hurt so much and watch as what you were slowly slips away from you, don't just tell your dr you're depressed, yes an anti-depressant will help, but I know that sitting down and talking to someone about the changes Fibro and other illnesses have forced upon you and your family help so much more. Don't let yourself get to the point I was at, where suicide wasn't just looking like a good idea, but the best option because it is not an idea, it is not an option.

And *big hugs* TY guys so much, for listening and being supportive. I couldn't have made it this far without you all, and you all have a very special place in my heart.