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Posted 8/18/2010 10:21 PM (GMT 0)
I was in Walmart yesterday looking for a few new throw rugs.  Being that there were quite a few to choose from I was on the rug aisle for a bit.  There were two women looking with me who had run into each other there and from what I gathered had worked together at some point.  They started talking about another woman they had worked with who has Fibromyalgia. And in particular how they thought she was just lazy.  They were saying how it's not a "real" diagnosis and that Doctors just hang it on people when they can't figure out what's really wrong.  They went on and on and I had to literally leave the store because I was so angry.  I wanted to say something but I figured I'd better keep my mouth shut since for one, I was so mad and who knows what I might have blurted out, two I have PMS right now and three they looked like they were rough characters.......If they only knew.  Anyway I tried today to just realize these people are ignorant and I was glad that I kept my mouth shut. 
Posted 8/18/2010 10:27 PM (GMT 0)
Oh, Libby!!! Uggggghhhhhh!!!!!

I completely understand what you're saying. There is a b word for people like them. devil

I do believe in teaching people - but if they're of a certain type, there is no getting through to them. Rough characters? They were probably just a couple of bullies. I detest bullies. Especially bullies who talk about other people when they can't defend themselves. Ugh!! I'm projecting - but .. just --- UGH!

I'm really sorry!

Kudos to you for not whacking them upside the head.
Posted 8/18/2010 10:43 PM (GMT 0)
I'd have informed them of the truth!
Posted 8/18/2010 10:57 PM (GMT 0)
Libby,

I'm sorry they ruined your shopping!  Just goes to show you how ignorant people can be.

Once I almost got beaten up for giving this woman the "evil eye" (?)  because she was being so verbally abusive to her son in Blockbuster.  This is how it went:

Her: WHAT??

Me: I couldn't help noticing how you treat your kid.

Her:  Back off.

Me: Yes, ma'am.  (Either she didn't catch the sarcasm in my voice, or she didn't want to pursue it.  Which is good because I already had Fibro, and she  was obviously younger and stronger!)  I just wanted the boy to know that not everyone thought his mother's behavior was normal.

I hear you, sometimes it's just not worth the grief.  Esp. if it's for ourselves, we tend to just suck it up and keep going, which is understandable.  We don't need more stress.  There's a term I heard a few years ago, TAB (temporarily able-bodied.)   Everyone is a TAB.  Everyone will eventually (if they live long enough) learn what it's like to be not so able, or to hurt, or both.  Then they'll understand.  

Debbie

 

Posted 8/18/2010 11:15 PM (GMT 0)
Libby, honestly I don't know what I would of done,but I would have had a hard time
not speaking up. I usually don't hold back when I'm angered so I probably would
of came off as an angry crazy lady,... not a good spokeswoman for fibro :)

Just shows you that public awareness of fibro is lacking. The commercials make it
seem like you take a pill and everything is fine and dandy. Some people are just
plain mean and others are misinformed. Fibro deserves more recognition!

Hugs,Robin
Posted 8/18/2010 11:29 PM (GMT 0)
Robin, are commercials for diseases/medications common? It is illegal in Europe. (Except OTC remedies, of course.) How do they work? Surely you still have to be prescribed them by a doctor - or can you ask for specific treatments?
Posted 8/18/2010 11:42 PM (GMT 0)

crazykitty said...


Just shows you that public awareness of fibro is lacking. The commercials make it
seem like you take a pill and everything is fine and dandy.

Hugs,Robin

Oh, Robin, this sooooo struck a nerve with me. I absolutely could go bonkers when I see those tv commercials for lyrica! They just emphasize how the drug takes away the pain and the woman runs off like nothing was every wrong. Ugh!!! They forget to mention the 6,000 other symptoms that Lyrica doesn't touch. They forget to mention that Lyrica doesn't work for everyone. They forget to mention that fibro sufferers are nothing like the fake women they use in their commercials. Grrr.

James - to answer - yes, they can and do run tv adverts for all sorts of medicines over here. I wish it was not allowed. It gives the wrong view, only one view, of the medication to the person who then goes to their doctor and says, "I want!" The doctor, on the other hand, is being fast talked by the drug peddlers ... er... sales people .. and given samples to give out to the patients. Some meds are good - but you can imagine when they're NOT so good this is problematic. It seems that the worse the medication, the bigger the marketing budget must be in order to convince people to take it.

Sorry if I rattle anyone with my views on meds - but I almost totally refuse to take any med unless is has been on the market almost as long as I've been alive.

Sorry if I'm sliding off topic. Not trying to high-jack your topic, Libby. I'll try to shut up now.
Posted 8/18/2010 11:42 PM (GMT 0)
Im sorry that you had to listen to two unintelligent women belittling someone who couldn't even defend herself. I have met so many people with nothing better to do than run someone down when they arent there. I can almost also guarantee you that when they are around this person they are both really nice to her. I try my hardest to avoid people like that. I have always believed if you cant say nice about someone dont say anything at all. I dont blame you at all for being upset. I would have wanted to say something too but probably wouldn't have. lol Hope next time you are shopping for rugs it goes better for you.
Gentle Hugs
Shirley
Posted 8/18/2010 11:43 PM (GMT 0)
PS: Debbie - hurray for you for standing up to that idiot mother!
Posted 8/18/2010 11:44 PM (GMT 0)
James, there have beena few differant commercials out for fibromyalgia advertising
for Cymbalta and Lyrica. Oh yeah, the pharmaceutical companies are really pushing
their meds. I didn't know it was illegal in Europe to advertise prescription meds.
Learn something new everyday!

Hugs, Robin
Posted 8/19/2010 2:04 AM (GMT 0)
I would have definitely spoken up and said something like "its too bad neither of you are educated enough to know that Fibro is a real and very painful disorder. I have it and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. What a shame that you would rather talk about someone behind their back instead of asking questions and learning"

Honestly, I just can't stay quiet any longer...I just don't care anymore what happens, I just need to share the real impact of Fibro and how it affects lives of the sufferers and their family/loved ones. Why is there no fund-raising or marathons or raffles to support research into this disorder? The time has come to remove the veil of silence and start talking about Fibro and what it does to people's lives.
Posted 8/19/2010 2:16 AM (GMT 0)
I can totally understand your frustration.  If I happen to mention fibro I can usually tell by people's expressions if they believe it is a "true" diagnosis.  If they don't believe I don't usually bother to educate.  Makes me too mad most times.
Posted 8/19/2010 4:56 AM (GMT 0)
I do not want this to go out the wrong way but as all us fibro ppl know it is a very mysterious disease. I think it is hard to go thru life with an invisible illness that no one can see and only you can feel, but I also see where they are coming from (as ignorant as they said it) all they see is a "lazy" person who doesnt do their job. I know that has to be hard for them too. Thats why I make sure that I work x tra hard somedays even more than I should so ppl dont see me as lazy and that I do my part. But in the same breath I also have very understanding co workers who arent "lazy" themselves (like hiding out in a corner talking about someone) So I guess I see both sides even tho i sympathize with the lady with fibro because just because we dont look sick doesnt me we arent sick fibro is an invisible ailment we live with every moment of everyday!

Love u ladies and gents
Posted 8/19/2010 8:38 AM (GMT 0)
I know I have started to cry when I tell people Fibro is a nightmare DX and I get reamed a new butt hole. They do not get it. I hear from them,"If you want a nightmare diagnosis, try cancer. You do not know what pain is, you do not have it that bad". Why can't people with Fibro and cancer both have severe pain? My husband had cancer, his went away with treatment. I feel horrible for people with cancer, I was a nurse and treated ppl with cancer (until Fibro stole my career). I tell the insensitive people; for someone with cancer, with all hope it will go into remission and then it is gone, like my husband's, or they pass away(hopefully remission though) and they no longer feel pain. Fibro is chronic and severe pain...all over pain.... indefinite pain. I could live with this pain for the next 50 years (i am 35) if someone does not take us serious and find a cure, or an adequate treatment. That, to me, is a nightmare. I have doctors say, "You need to learn to accept that you may never have a period of time, when you are pain free.....at a zero or a 3." Why? That is not acceptable to me, it never will be. I have too many things I want to do. If not for myself, then my family. I just do not understand why I have to be compared to someone with some other ailment. Pain and suffering is pain and suffering, no matter what causes it. I told a doctor once, that when they figure out what causes Fibro I am going to expect a major apology for them telling me I am crazy.
The insensitive people are not hearing me at all. To have cancer and know you could die is a nightmare, yes. The nightmare I speak of is the pain of Fibro and the fact that nobody seems to care or take us serious..it is hard to live with. It is a nightmare to know that I am going to have to beg for pain medicine for only God knows how long. Before I was getting pain medicine, I considered suicide, my pain got that bad. I have a very severe case of Fibro that has responded to nothing except narcotic pain medicine, and even then, the pain is not 100% gone or even 60%, I still have some very bad days too. If any of the other non narcotics would help, I would happily take them, but they don't. I gave them all a good try... The pain is the worst part of my Fibro, but I have the other crap with it. Bowel issues, headaches, menses issues, numbness.....I got it all. Ugh....cannot sleep. Sorry for venting. I am new here, nice to meet you all. Hoping I can get some advice and support here.
Posted 8/19/2010 12:14 PM (GMT 0)
Hi BJ and welcome to the boards, sorry you are in so much pain right now, I do understand what you are feeling trust me I do. I have had fibro for many years and there were a lot of days that I would go to bed praying that I wouldnt wake up in the morning. I have learned little ways of managing the pain better through the years but there are still alot of days that I just hurt and I have come to accept that.
People can be so insensitive when it comes to fibro because of all the rumors out there that it isnt a real disease and that makes it alot harder for those of us that do suffer with it. I hope that you can find some good days soon. Once again welcome and dont be afraid to ask questions, vent, or offer advice. That is why we are all here.
Gentle Hugs
Shirley
Posted 8/19/2010 12:54 PM (GMT 0)
So frustrating. I'm often hesitant to tell people that I have fibro because it seems to have such a stigma attached to it among the ignorant masses (and by that, I mean ignorant of the disease, not in general).

There are many illnesses that are invisible; I'm not sure why fibro gets such a bad rap. Maybe because the medical community has just begun to take it seriously. Hopefully, it will eventually become as mainstream and accepted as diabetes or arthritis. Our disease is real, and medicine sometimes takes a while to catch up with reality. At one time, it was a common practice to bleed patients to get rid of "bad humours." We now call those "humours" bacteria and viruses. rolleyes

Hugs - Austen
Posted 8/19/2010 4:43 PM (GMT 0)
OMGSH, that is so aggravating.

I think my family thought that at first.

When my ex told me he wanted a divorce he said that I was lazy and boring and had no ambition.
He never understood and wasn't supportive at all.
Posted 8/19/2010 7:57 PM (GMT 0)
Libby, I would have been angry, too! How infuriating. It must have felt like they were also insulting you in the process of insulting their co worker. Some people are so rude!
Sue
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