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Exhausted and Givin up!

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Posted 10/1/2010 2:45 PM (GMT 0)
I am so tired today and sor no reason what so ever, i got plenty of sleep last night. And I have excepted the fact that I will probably never get a diagnosis and will never get better. I have been trying to have a really good additude about all of this but it is starting to really get me down. I have had the head fog for about 2 years now and it has not gottwn any better, they even had to send me to physical therapy for my ears which believ eit or not was helping a little bit. I walk through everyday in like fog I am so sick of it, I have terrible pains in my stomuch and I just never feel quite right. I just wish that someone would say this is the problem and fix it. But after dealing with this for so long i am sure that will never happen. And I also have the awful internal shaking, i just want to live a full happy life with my children but sometimes I feel like i am not going to be around cause of this medical stuff. I just want to live!

Kat

Posted 10/1/2010 3:41 PM (GMT 0)
Kat, it always feels good to get a diagnosis but, with fibro, they still can't fix it.  You have to be your own advocate and look for things that will help you.  I wish I could say to take this or that and you would be fine, but that won't happen.  What works for one might not work for you.  You have to try things and see how your body reacts. 

 

If I were you, read Fibro 101 if you haven't already.  There are things in there that just might help you.  Also, there is a lot of info in back posts.  Or, just asking questions and getting responses could help you.

 

The fog?  Laugh it off.  Honestly!  The more you worry about it, the worse it will be.  I was quite frightened at first because I thought I was getting Alzheimer's.  Now, I just laugh at the dumb things I do, write list so I don't forget stuff, either.  It's good to do things like crossword puzzles...anything that causes you to use your brain. 

 

Don't let fibro beat you down.  If you do, it wins!  Nope!  You fight and find what will help you some.  You won't be pain-free.  I'm not...not even close to that but I have had a great life and done what I've wanted to do.  I just refuse to let this illness stop me because I only have one shot at this life and I'm going to have a great time!

 

Lastly, fibro isn't anything you die from.  It just can give you pains and make things more difficult to do.  You mentioned that you were afraid you weren't going to be around because of your medical problems.  You can't think like that.  It will depress you and make your pain worse.  I have fibro, diabetes, Crohn's disease, an ostomy, osteoporosis, glaucoma, and am legally deaf!  But you know what?  I'm fully enjoying my life!  If I can, so can you.  Stop thinking about your illness and just focus on your plans for the day.  Keep moving...walking, stretching, swimming if you have access to a pool.  Enjoy every moment with your children because they grow up so fast.  Don't tell yourself you can't do something because you will start to believe that.  You can do anything you put your mind to!  So, you are going to live and a good attitude will certainly help you have a far more enjoyable life.  

 

I hope this helps you some.  Make a list of the positive things in  your life.  You will see how many blessing you really have and that can help you deal with this, too.  I hope you get some relief.

 

Sherrine 

Posted 10/1/2010 3:44 PM (GMT 0)
I'm so sorry to hear that, and I feel the same way! I just want to be diagnosed so I can have proper diet, pills, whatever....something has got to help.

I have that internal shaking too. It's very wierd. It only happens when I'm lying down just trying to rest or if I get woken suddenly. I just had a sleep study recently and I asked them about it. They said it is due to anxiety. I don't think so though, because mine is only sometimes. I seem to notice a pattern of it happening when I am in my complete exhaustion states, unbearable pain and dizzy spell episodes.

Maybe you should ask for a sleep study to be done, and also too, I dont know if it's going to help or not, but I bought myself a daily planner, and I write all my symptoms down, every day, even if they are minor. I will bring this with me when I finally get in to the rheumatologist again! There's gotta be answers, don't give up!!
Posted 10/1/2010 3:50 PM (GMT 0)
Kittybear,

Oh---so sorry you are not feeling good.  Some days it can be so hard and it sounds like today may be one of them.  Not having a diagnosis is the pits because it makes you doubt yourself and what you are feeling.  Know that we have all been there too!  It took me almost 10 years to get a diagnosis. 

Be good to yourself today--Take a hot bath or get your heating pad out.  Rest awhile but try to get up every 30 minutes and just move around for about 10 or 15 minutes even 5 minutes of walking around the house or moving helps on bad days for me.  Set your timer for 20 or 30 minutes when you go back to your chair so the ringing will make you get up!  I know, I know who wants to get up!  But it will encourage you to move around some and pacing your day can really help.

Gentle hugs,

Yoyo

Posted 10/1/2010 4:11 PM (GMT 0)
Don't give up Kitty, there will be plenty of wonderful days ahead for you.
You might not realize it now, but in time you will find that you can enjoy life
no matter what may come along. Always remember that each day is a
new day....a chance for wonderful things.

Pain does hurt, and finding ways to make it easier is the first step. Doing what
you can do to help yourself is important. Believing that things will get better
is so important. If you are in a mindset that things can not improve...chances are
they won't. "Those who think that the world is a dark place are blind to the light
that might illuminate your life."  I want so much for you to know that life can be
good. If you are having a difficult time perhaps talking with a therapist might.
help. Kitty, I'm only wishing you the best and want you to enjoy life!

Sending gentle hugs and prayers your way!

Hugs, Robin
Posted 10/2/2010 2:02 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you everyone so much for the support sometimes it just gets really hard and I get so negative about things. I have had a whole bunch of bloodwork done and everything has been normal so the doc says that he is pretty sure it is fibro but then i get the internal shaking and mind fog stuff and hard time walking and i think nope he is wrong it is something really bad this is the end of me. I also have high anxiety and sometimes it takes over. I am so glad that i have found this site though all of you guys are truly wonderful caring people, god bless all of you for your love support and kind words. Thank you so much fibro family!
Kat
Posted 10/2/2010 2:38 PM (GMT 0)
Kat, there are several members that have the internal "shaking" feeling on this forum!  You are not alone there.  I sometimes feel like my blood is boiling! 

 

Oh, the fog!  Everyone has that!  I tried to start my car with the key to the freezer...on two different occasions!  You'd have thought I would have learned that the first time.  Speaking of freezers...you never know what you'll find in there...maybe ice cream, maybe your purse!  We all do this.  BUT, the more  you worry about it, the worse it seems to get.  So, dig out your sense of humor and laugh at the things.  I used to cry over the fog.  There are conversations that my daughters have said I have had but I have no recollection of them!  Now that's scary.  I thought I was getting Alzheimer's at first.  But I know it is fibrofog now and just laugh it off.  Here is a link with more fog stories that might help ease your fears.

 

http://webspace.webring.com/people/fc/cfsdays/follies.htm

 

Try to get a handle on that anxiety.  I suffered with that and was on a lot of Valium for it, too.  When I realized that all anxiety was was fear, I decided I was not going to live in fear, stopped the Valium, and learned how to contro it.  (This is why I have that scripture in my signature.)  When the symptoms of anxiety would start to come, I would dismiss them because I knew what they were and then got focused on something that took my mind off how I felt.  You can't keep thinking about how you feel.  You need to start living your life.  You have a great life ahead of you.  I know I've had a full and enjoyable life in spite of fibro.  If I can do it, so can you!

 

Hope you are having a good day today.

 

Sherrine

Posted 10/2/2010 3:11 PM (GMT 0)
Kat, all these crazy symptoms are just that...crazy. The fog can be frustrating
but can make me laugh. Yesterday, I was going to go shopping...as I got into
the car, I realized I had two purses hanging from my shoulder...usually I can't
even find one. When I got into the car, I realized I didn't have my keys.

I have a whole load of dx's... but to me, no matter what I have..I handle it all
in the same way...one day at a time...pain is pain and you learn to handle it.

I used to be the queen of anxiety a Nervous Nellie for sure. One thing I have
learned there is nothing to worry about. You either have control or you don't.
If you can control a situatuion...then control it. If you don't have any control
over it...let it go. In the past, I have wasted too much energy over things I
have no control over.

When I find my anxiety level rising...I focus on breathing deeply from my
diaphragm and think wonderful thoughts. I do relaxation therapy throughout
the day....deep breathing and meditation. I even do my deep breathing at
the grocery store, waiting in the checkout line.

Kat, I know it seems difficult now...I was where you are....but you will learn
to live with these crazy symptoms and live with a genuine smile on your face!

Hang in there hon...we are here for you :)

Hugs, Robin
Posted 10/2/2010 11:29 PM (GMT 0)
Kat, I get the shakes, too. It's an awful feeling. As far as your stomach pains, what do the doctors say? Is Irritable Bowel Syndrome a possibility? That can cause so many different problems and can be very painful, although, like fibro, it's not dangerous. Diet can help - but here I am, getting ahead of myself.

I wish I could think as positively as some of our other members, but I'm getting better at it, just from reading their stories. My doctor is a great help to me, too. He's so smart and has a wonderful sense of humor, so every time I leave his office I feel validated (not pampered, though) and hopeful.

I can't remember (no brain, right??) if you have a good support system - doctor, family, friends? That's so important. Well, you have us. And I'm sure you can help us, too, because we are all in this together, for better or for worse.

Debbie
Posted 10/3/2010 6:51 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks again everyone for the support it just gets scary! I have to really put my mind to it to gets things done somdays! This shaking is really getting to me. I do have a doctor appointment tommrow so I am going to bring it up. I also have really bad allergies to the point where i had to go to physical therapy for me ears to regain my balance and I have sever scoliosis, so it could be those things to that are affecting the shaking! Not sure but I will keep everyone posted thank you again everyone, having you all heret o talk to makes this so much more bearable!
Posted 10/3/2010 7:55 PM (GMT 0)
Kat,

I'm getting the shakes really bad all weekend and feel very unwell....I feel like I could die, but I have to try to be strong. I need to be here for my little girls. If you find out anything about the shaking, please let me know.

We went to our trailer this weekend and all I could do was sleep. It's very sad for my family. And I was so sick with the shakes and migraine this morning, I can barely hold my head up and thought I was going to throw up!

Hugs and hope you feel better soon!

Krista
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