feeling very offended

i am sorry to say i am left feeling very upset after reading a comment made by sherrine on a post made this month. i would have sent my feelings regarding this direct to sherrine if i had any way to do so, being quite new to the internet im not sure if this is the right way to express my feelings or not.
sherrine you commented that when you went to diysneyland " there were too many people and too many who were overweight renting wheelchairs and you cant get around the park because of it. i feel your comment was a very wrong thing to say, the first thing is i have a son who is in a wheelchair and this is not due to the fact that he is over weight, my son is in a wheelchair because he was neglected after his birth by medical staff and suffered brain damage. i also have a very dear friend who lives in florida, she is spends everyday in extreme pain due to many different illnesses and one of them is fibro some others are lung disease and arthritis.my friend goes out a walk everyday to try and keep herself from being stiff and sore, but walks very slowely but like myself has found that due to pain she can no longer do the things she loved doing and has put on a lot of weight over the years. due to her own weight issues she no longer looks in the mirror and trys very hard to loose weight but cant loose much as she cant excersise.she used to go to dysney land every year since her grankids were born untill 3 yr ago when twice in one trip a comment was made to her like the one you made.she rents a chair on her visit or she couldnt go.due to the lady saying look at her in a wheeelchair cause shes fat my friend has never went again.she was very depressed due to this and it ruined her whole holiday and more, its made her feel worse about herself.
we should all no that suffering from fibro is an illness no one can see or even know your ill at all, and i feel we should not make a comment like this esp on a support forum were we really dont know what people we are talking to look like.i find it very upsetting and offensive.i have put on a lot of weight and if i went on holiday to dysney land i would not go without a wheelchair not because of my weight but due to pain and weakness. i think that sherrine gives a lot of great advice to many people inc myself, but this is very hurtful thing to say as you cant tell if people are in pain. would it be said if the people were all very thin who were in the wheelchairs. i think not !! people who are in chairs have every right to be in the park as much as the people who are not, i feel by saying too many over weight people in wheelchairs is like saying thev no right to be there and no right to use chairs. im very upset and am now thinking maybe this isnt the place for me, but i must stress iv found this a great place to be and its wonderful to find others who have this condition and i finnally found people who could give me great advice. iv also learned so much since i joined.
i felt i cant go on here unless i let my feelings reg the above be known.
i wish you all painfree days/nights ahead,
shana

Myjoy, please don't let one persons comment take you away from here. I enjoy reading and commenting on your posts :) and feel like I've made a friend with you.

Shana,

I agree with Myjoy. Sherrine responds to so many posts, and helps so many people...I'm sure she didn't mean any offense to people in wheelchairs or overweight people. She was just relaying her experience (and maybe could have chosen her words more carefully) - but who of us doesn't sometimes put things in a less than perfect way?

As to the weight issue, I can't tell you how many times I'll mention to someone that I'm cold, or weak, or whatever, and they'll look irritated and say, "Well, just put on some weight, then!" (I would if I could, believe me!) So that sword also cuts both ways, something I never would have understood when I was younger and fighting to keep the weight off.

So please don't let this one misunderstanding keep you off the forum. Intentions are important, and I believe Sherrine has only the best intentions.

Debbie

Shana,
I am sorry that you are feeling hurt. I know what comment you are talking about and am glad you spoke up because communication is healthy. I have been on the forum for a couple of years and know that Sherrine always means the best and wants the best for our friends here. As you know, when we are in pain, it is hard to think clearly and say things with the utmost tact. Sometimes it is even hard to express a cohesive thought!

And my thoughts here are a bit awkward and not sure if they make sense!

I hope you will take comfort in the fact that we are all not perfect, we say and do things that come out all wrong, but we care a lot about one another.

Hugs,
Sue

saintsfan said...
Myjoy, please don't let one persons comment take you away from here. I enjoy reading and commenting on your posts :) and feel like I've made a friend with you.

 

I think you meant the OP, not me. I was trying to encourage her.