GRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

    I really need to vent but this post could turn into a short story before I can get my thought out so bare with me. I could really use some advice.

I have recently had to give up my career as I said before. Then, a few months later, my husband was laid off. We are both unemployed at the moment and as a result I have had to move in with my parents. For most this wouldn't be a huge issue, just a little uncomfortable. Well, it is unbearable. My entire life my family has been very negative. There is an ample amount of drama and trash talking about the others. No sense of respect. They are the type of people that want to know every negative detail of your life unless it something meaningful....like fibro...then, they run. I am having a really hard time dealing with being back in this environment. I moved several miles away years ago and I was left alone, but now it is all around me. Then, to add to the frustration, my parents are unreasonable people. My father is dealing with extremely high cholesterol and triglycerides. He finds this out and immediately comes to me for how to fix it. Never asked. It was an order. I took care of it and within one week of implementing my ideas and meals he dropped 12 lbs. But, when he found out about the fibro or the heart condition he ignored it. Never asks how I am doing. Doesn't ask about what's going on. He didn't even know I had been to the doctor for 3 weeks. I was even taking myself to cardiologists at 16. When I have a rough night and I am awake all night I tend to fall asleep around 6am and I will sleep until around 12pm. When I get up he usually greets me with, "Its about time you got your sorry a** out of bed" or some other derrogatory intro.If I mention I am hurting I get "its all in your head", or "walk it off." Then, I have to spend all waking hours taking care of him and my mother and let all of my things like homework, my kids, and personal errands for late at night. I am staying behind and struggling to get through everything. I am finding it very hard to even care about their problems because they have never shown an ounce of concern for me. I am a 27 year old, married, mother of 3, college student, and have had a successful career, but I am a failure to them. Its never enough. I am treated like I am a complete idiot.The stress is really causing the pain to remain constant and persistent. If anyone has any ideas on how to deal with people like this or atleast shed some light on a different perspective that I am missing that could help me cope that would be awesome. I don't have anywhere to go so trying to make this situation a little more tolerable is the only option.  Sorry if this sounds whiny or anything. I am just overly frustrated with negativity and poor attitudes.

Gentle hugs & lots of laughter,

Ivey

     It is not the norm for me to air this type of business publicly, but with no one I can speak to about it I am feeling overwhelmed. As a mother myself, I understand the logic that it may be hurtful to my parents to accept that they have created something "less than perfect", but in my mind, as a parent, you have to set aside your personal feelings in order to properly care for, comfort, and understand your child. I was always the "smart one" and they have always told me that they expect more from me. That I can do "better" than the others. With that mindset in place it really puts me as the black sheep of the family. I am not treated as well or cared for as well as the other children. The reality is, I just want a break. I don't want to keep up that persona anymore. It allows me no room for relaxation. I want to be as normal as everyone else. I don't want them to lower their expectations persay, but make them a little more realistic. From daylight to dark, my focus is on their happiness because my own is dependent on it. I desperately need to get back to my own life so I can turn my back on this madness! I really appreciate you all listening to my vent and trying to help. Things will get better soon!

And Shirley-Thanks for the perspective and the idea of leaving the articles around. I am not hopeful it will help, but definitely worth a try!!

Gentle hug & lots of laughter,

Ivey