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When do you finally say enough is enough?

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Posted 2/12/2011 10:27 PM (GMT 0)
I really would like to know....when do you say enough is enough with pushing yourself. I had to leave work today, only stayed an hour. I hurt....my muscles ache. It just hurt to click the mouse button and write...like it is now to type. I have an 8 hr sitting job, it's not very flexible. I used to work the hospital floor as RN but took a very low paying job cause of pain. Now after a year of this job I feel like I can't make it through 8 hrs. I have fibro, severe degenerated disk in l5-s1, bursitis in both hips. I don't understand why we have to push ourselves to work when we hurt. it's just not fair. Sorry im venting here. lol. I am seriously thinking about disability. Im 37 and people keep saying Im to young for it. I really don't see how age can matter.

KL

Posted 2/12/2011 10:55 PM (GMT 0)
KL,

I don't believe age matters, either. I felt better in my 40s than I did in my 30s, because when I was younger I didn't understand fibro and didn't have the resources to deal with it right, and I also didn't know when to say enough was enough.

Sorry you're hurting so bad. The people who are telling you you're too young just don't know what they're talking about!

Debbie
Posted 2/13/2011 1:03 AM (GMT 0)
My 19 year old DD and 23 year old DS would tell you that you can have it at any age. My DS had a run in with a GP last week about this andhe has had it for about 10 years.
If some tells them they are too yoiung they just ask if the other person could live in constant pain, no sleep and being too sore to move.
Both these young people work my DD part time and DS full time. But they are talking about putting him on disability [Australia] a lot different it is one Doc you need to see and your records. I got mine in 5 ins once I walked in the room and the Doc told me never too ask to be their patient because I was too bad for her to handle.
So tell them too try to walk a day in your shoes, or wait to they suffer a strain or such like and then say is that all.
I have made a lot of people understand the type of pain I suffer by doing this.
Take heart we all stand with you

Kathy
Posted 2/13/2011 5:29 PM (GMT 0)
My husband is 9 years older than me. He filed last June. He wanted to file sooner but the attorney told him that 55 was the magic age. They seem to approve more people after 55 for some reason. Maybe the criteria changes. I am 45 and would like to file but it is just harder when you are younger to be approved. I agree it shouldn't make any difference. Your best chance is to have as much doctor documentation as possible. If after you file you are denied don't get upset just get an attorney. We have one now that didn't charge us a dime. He only collects if we win and it is a set one time price. The down side is it is a long process. We are now waiting for a new hearing that will take place sometime next year. The good side is once approved the funds will be retroactive from the day in June that he first filed. That is what the attorney ususe to be paid and you get the rest and your continued checks. Best of luck to you!
Posted 2/13/2011 5:52 PM (GMT 0)
thanks so much for your help. I don't know what to do. It's a hard choice...especially when you feel like losing your job is losing your identity, and self worth. I hate to depend on people, I guess it makes me feel lazy. I am feeling better today, so I will be able to make it to work. We are only allowed to miss 7 days a year and dr excuses don't count..haha..that's hard to do with a chronic problem like this.

Thanks for listening! :)
KL
Posted 2/14/2011 2:57 AM (GMT 0)
I keep my supers informed with any probs I have as they mount up. Thursday I left work 3 hrs early in an 6 hr work day. I had a headache and could not concentrate and felt myself getting more annoyed by patients calling than usual. People screaming at me on the phone did not help. One day I left a couple of hrs one day cause my back hurt me so bad i was hunched over they seemed to understand. We have 40 hrs in a 6 month period that is suppose to be our limit but I always go over it  For part time  1 day = 4 hrs). My dr wrote a letter saying I might miss work more due to health. Hubby and I have talked about it. My paycheck is enough for our mortgage and some extras. I worry about losing that. He says if i have to quit, we will handle it. Great guy, Love him so much!

My goal this month was not to miss a day.  Does going home early count?

Good luck!

Posted 2/18/2011 2:04 AM (GMT 0)

  I am having an awful week.  I am in so much pain that nothing seems to help.  I've called in sick all week. I try to do work at home then I can rest.  The only problem is I don't have a brain and it takes me twice as long to do anything.  I do work for my Father who says he understands, but about every 6 weeks we have a meeting and he wants to know my plans.  What plans?  I don't even know when the fibro is going to act up.  My Dad is stressing me out so much I just want to give up and not work anymore.  Then I have a few good days and I love my job.  What do I do?

  When I talked to PA at the pain clinic she said I couldn't get disability for pain.  But its more than just pain.  I get so nausited I can only eat soda crackers and 7UP.  I am exhausted and I can't concentrate at work when the pain is out of control. I do take Lyrica but I am not sure if it works or not.  I am afraid to stop taking it because I do have some good days.  I was really feeling bad for myself the other night and found the Spoon story and emailed my Dad.   Is there a job that I can do from home? 

  Does anyone else become nausiated during their flare up? 

Debi

Posted 2/18/2011 2:50 AM (GMT 0)
I can so relate to this. I am having an awful time, to make matters worse I am slipping behind. I am an administrative assistant to a regional director for cable. So many days when I just can't concentrate due to pain and concentration issues. Hours missed atleast once a week. I have intermittent FMLA but it's still hard
Posted 2/18/2011 4:19 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Klambert~

I'm so sorry that pain and agony is ruining your life. When is enough, enough? When your quality of life is deteriorated and each day is miserable. When you've tried your best and just can't go any more. When your doctor has done about all he/she can do? When you ask, "when is enough, enough?"

IMHO, you needn't wait any longer to apply for disability. My doctor told me to file for state disability first. Then use that to springboard into social security disability. I don't know all of the ropes on this yet as I've stalled due to my own stubbornness, but I think it's time for me too...but I'm way older than you are! smhair shocked We've had many member file at younger ages and get approved. I remember one gal in Florida who was a nurse. She had fibro and depression and was approved on the first go-around. If you think about it...we usually only hear the bad stories of people filing and being denied. But those who get approved rarely come on to a forum and carry on about how easy it was or that they had a very short wait time. See where I'm coming from?

I would suggest that you go ahead and try....what do you have to loose? If you have a doctor who is easy to work with then it will be all that much easier. Even though you might not find fibromyalgia on "The" list of ailments that qualify you for disability, that doesn't mean it's not given for it. There are allowances for things that result in chronic pain and if you add any other debilitating disorder to that, like your hips/spine, then I would think you should have a good chance.

Go online and see what you think. Below is a link to the SS page. Let us know how you are doing..OK?

Hugs,
Chutz

www.ssa.gov/
Posted 2/18/2011 12:11 PM (GMT 0)
Hi, im so sorry you've got so much pain. Age has nothing to do with disability, I am 23 and I'm on disability, due to fibro etc.
I also have a disabled badge for our car.
If you feel you cannot work anymore, then go for disability. It is hard getting used to not going out to work, but its worth it to save all the extra pain and stress.

I hope you listen to your body and do whats best :)

Gentle hugz
Posted 2/18/2011 12:13 PM (GMT 0)
Oh i forgot to say, I was approved the first time round. which i was very greatful of. :)
Posted 2/18/2011 12:46 PM (GMT 0)
Hi, I am not on disability however I would like to respond to the identity issue you are talking about. I went from working as a Sped teacher which I always identified myself as to not working at all. I am a very disorganized person. With Fibro fog, depression and ADD, I could not keep all the balls up in the air so I was told to resign or be fired so I resigned. I identified myself as a teacher and now I was nothing. Who was I? But with time, I realized that I was a mother, wife, foster mother, Lisa, and someone who had alot to offer and why not try to do something else. I am trying to start my own business doing cards and scrapbooks and various artsy stuff. It took me a while to find myself but I did and so will you! Sorry if I am lecturing/rambling. As far as the disability, I have no experience with that so I cannot offer any advice. I am not at that point. Hope that helped.
Take care,
Lisa
Posted 2/18/2011 12:56 PM (GMT 0)
I have taken up alot of "easy" hobbies, ive started card making, jewellery making and also knitting, when my hands aren't in spasms.
It takes my mind off of not being able to work etc. x
Posted 2/18/2011 1:40 PM (GMT 0)
Anything to take your mind off of the pain is worse. Sometimes I don't know what is worse, the acheness, spasms or the pain.
Posted 2/18/2011 1:57 PM (GMT 0)
the acheness i can just about cope with, its the spasms and general pain i can't deal with. what makes it harder is the fact that you can't even sleep through it :(
Posted 2/18/2011 2:19 PM (GMT 0)
Very True...The only thing you can do is take it one day at a time...
Posted 2/18/2011 2:27 PM (GMT 0)
yea and just hope and pray the next day is going to be better than today x
Posted 2/18/2011 2:37 PM (GMT 0)
 

My week starts out good, I'm out on the track and working on Monday, when I come home I am beat, like its my first day back every single monday. Tuesday...since I went straight to bed after work, I can usually pull out another pretty good day. Unless no sleep, then all of this does not matter because I'm just dragging.

By Wed the sail is starting to get very low, but I keep plugging away, I'm lucky if by Thursday, I have not had to take any time of yet for the week. Then Friday comes, golden friday...exhausted, I drag myself into work and seem to somehow make it thru just knowing that I have a whole Saturday and Sunday to me to relax, rest, sleep and recover from the week.

 

But it makes me not very social or anything, all I want to do is sleep and rest. Not be social, go to friends houses, parties, nothing just rest. So that really puts a downer on things with my family. I don't think my quality of life that I have while I work is good at all. But again, its just scares me because we can't afford to go to one income, while I was and start the whole dissability process. But I guess sooner or later, it will happen. I've already came out one for fibro, then came out 6 weeks last year in Oct when I had hemmoriods removed, but it was 6-7 weeks to relax, uncomfortable yes, but hey, at lreast I was relaxing and resting.

 

There is never an easy way.....but...its' my friday!!WhooooHooooo!!

Posted 2/18/2011 4:16 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Klambert, I just wanted you to know there is another site you can go to too check on qualifications and fibro. It is called Allsup just do a search on it. I have no interest in them other than to try and help you get information. I didnt even hire them when I applied for ssdi the sight just gave me some insight as to if it was worth applying. Hope this helps. Oh by the way I did get approved the first time I applied so give it a shot.
Gentle Hugs
Shirley
Posted 2/18/2011 6:02 PM (GMT 0)
I can relate to everyone. I work full time and it can be really difficult. My saving grace is I am able to take sick time when I need it and I am not in as much pain as some of you. I also can kind of hide in my office if I am not doing well, or not take lunch andleave a little early.
But what makes me so mad is all of my energy goes to work- then I have no life by the time I get home I can't do anything. That gets me so pissed off!!!

I agree with everyone that age should have nothing to do with disability, if you are in so much pain and can't do your job that is what they should be looking at, not how old you are. Hang in there!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted 2/18/2011 9:00 PM (GMT 0)
I'm in the same boat. I'm almost 38 and debated myself with this. My biggest problem is I have Cubital Tunnel on top of the Fibro, depression, anxiety, Raynauds Syndrome now and the list goes on. I can't do repetitive work which leaves out A LOT of jobs then you add Fibro on top of that and it's a disaster. I have 2 episodes in my work history in the last 10years of gaps of time not working due to the Cubital Tunnel and have been unemployed since my last surgery with Cubital Tunnel. I am nothing but a liability to jobs just looking at my resume. My arms are killing me then u add the Fibro. I guess my point is, I have reached that "enough is enough" stage. I have applied for SSD and am waiting for the process. It took me a little while for someone to take me so we'll see what happens. I too, worry about "losing myself" but I think if I get on the disability that I can relieve some stress and try and figure out things from there. All I do is stress out trying to figure out what to do with my life now in this situation I was dealt and come up with nothing. I have a fear of going back to work and getting injured again and now worry how to deal with the pain and fog from Fibro. I'll keep you posted whether I can get mine or not. If you have gotten to that point that you can't work then you first need to find a doctor that will back you up. Mine almost didn't because she was afraid of me being "too young" which I understood where she was coming from but...I'm the one having to deal with the pain so after a few discussions she agreed. So don't give up and only YOU can make that decision. Good luck with whatever you do!
Posted 2/18/2011 9:36 PM (GMT 0)
Boy do I know how you are feeling!  My doctor told me he wouldn't support me in a disability claim because they are so hard to get.  I'm 59.  He's been treating me for depressions for years.  FM and IBS are within the last two years.  He says I'll just get bored if I stay home. Man-o-man!  I had to take 3 months off last year because my employer would not let me work on morphine but the disability people said find an employer who would let me work on morephin.  Apparently, if you are in a sedentary job they can't they can force you to work no matter how many drugs you take or how much pain you're in.   Hang in there.  I never hired an attorney but I'm thinking of looking into it more.   smhair
Posted 2/19/2011 2:12 AM (GMT 0)
I think what they mean by your being "too young" for disability is that it's REALLY hard to get on it when you're under 50. The govt. doesn't like to pay out disability for prolonged periods of time, you see. Also, it's very hard to get on disability for fibro alone. Your disk problem might give you an advantage, as it's something that shows up in lab tests and can't be dispited, as fibro is.

I began applying in 2003, and still haven't been accepted. :(
Posted 2/19/2011 4:00 PM (GMT 0)

erieislander said...
My husband is 9 years older than me. He filed last June. He wanted to file sooner but the attorney told him that 55 was the magic age. They seem to approve more people after 55 for some reason.

After years of applying and re-applying, my father finally got on disability recently. He is just over 55 now and a lawyer told him the same thing about the magic number deal. Total BS in my opinion, but what erieislander says seems to be true. Here's hoping you find some sort of relief!
Posted 2/20/2011 2:14 AM (GMT 0)
My son does ssd cases and yes the magic number is 50  iwas 48 when i filed i have 2 forms arthtris.fm,7 bad disks sugar, mental ilness, copd 2,skin disease, blood pressure,astma ,but after 50 they look at things different so after my records got lost by ssd it end up be 4 years and 4 days that i got it and they only wanted to go back 6 months on my disiable but i took all the back to supreme court and i won that too so i recieved a nice 20 thousand check so like my son says hang your head high and fight, fight,Deb
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