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Posted 2/24/2011 9:22 PM (GMT 0)
Sorry, need to get this stuff off my chest.

No matter how bad my pain or emotions are like i still have to get up and do the household chores, we have a cat and her litter tray obviosly needs to be done, well thats my job etc.

my husband has hurt his back, so he's pretty much in agony (like i am everyday), but i have to "get on with it" no matter how i feel, why is it so different for men?!!!

Im sorry for this but i really needed to get things off my chest, its really getting to me now. im very stubborn and when i set my mind to doing something, then i want to do it, but why can't things be done before i get round to it???

my husband gets up 3 hours before me, so he can see what needs to be done, but he doesnt do it, he just sits on his laptop all morning.

im not saying he's putting his back pain on, cuz he's not, but why is it when im in so much pain, i still have to suck it in and grit my teeth?!!!!

thanks for letting me get things off my chest

Amz
Posted 2/24/2011 9:41 PM (GMT 0)
Sadly, it's not just a man thing. My wife has terrible PPD (postpartum depression) from the birth of our daughter last June, and I still get the bulk of what needs to be done. I have fibromyalgia, depression, and PTSD; yet I'm up 3 - 4 hours before her to get everything done, work a full day, then take care of our little one until bedtime. I think it has more to do with those of us that have accepted that this is the way things are, versus those who see what's happening as new or temporary. My wife's PPD was sudden and unexpected, so she's still riding the wave of "things will get better" while many of us are comfortable in the reality of "the way things are".

I totally understand why you're upset, and it's nice to know I'm not the only one that gets a bit irked about it sometimes ;)
Posted 2/24/2011 10:36 PM (GMT 0)
Hi C.R.,

Welcome to the HealingWell Fibromyalgia forum. I think this is the first post that I have seen of yours.

It sounds like you do a lot. Helping around the house, and taking care of the children, plus working. It is hard when we have fibromyalgia. It is hard just to get out of bed.

I hope that your wife feels better soon and I hope that you do too.

Amz,

I responded to your post in the depression forum. I hope that you continue to post there too.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 2/25/2011 3:50 AM (GMT 0)
Thanks for the warm welcome =D Today is my first day on these forums, and it's great to see so many people that are posting and supporting each other. I'll check out the other areas of the boards and look forward to being a part of such an active, friendly community.

C.R.
Posted 2/25/2011 4:12 AM (GMT 0)
Hey C.R. Welcome!! Why don't you start a new thread and introduce yourself? Forgive me if you already did.

Amz, I know exactly where you are coming from. There is stuff around the house that would never get done if I didn't do it. I have left his glass (or whatever) where he left it just to see how long it would stay there. It gets really bad when the grandkids are here for the weekend. He always says......"ask Meme" no matter what it is.

Funny thing is that he thinks our log house / farm type house should look like better homes and gardens. He is a neat freak....not that he picks up anything.....I have to be the perfect housecleaner .....hahahhahahhaha never was and never will be. Told him he better make more money so I can hire a house cleaner, only way that's going to happen.

You said you have a cat.......I have 2 German Shepherds in the house that demand to be fed the minute I wake up and walk down the steps, along with them hubby is asking if I will make him "just one egg?" Set my mood for the day and not in a good way. I ALWAYS say "at least let me have some coffee and a cigarette, just let me freaking wake uo for goodness sake!!!" After that There are 4 Shepherds in the kennel and 2 horses and a pony that all need fed.

So you see, you are not at all alone. I could add more & more...........
Posted 2/25/2011 3:12 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Amz, Denise is so right in the fact that you are not alone. My husband has MS and I understand that I need to do things for him, however he no longer does anything here at home. He can be 5 steps away from the garbage can but will have me come out of the living room to throw it away for him. Or call me out to get him a can of pop from the fridge. I understand getting his coffee and fixing his plate for him because he is so shakey that alot of times it ends up spilling if he does try to do it. However he is capable of taking his plate out to the sink or carrying an unopen can but he doesn't.

I have even talked to him about this several times but it seems to go in one ear and out the other. lol At least he's not having a fit over when the dishes get done like he used to. Things are looking up. lol

Gentle Hugs
Shirley
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