Bad News From Kentucky

Oh, Shannon!  I'm so terribly sorry.  There just aren't words enough to tell you how much I feel your pain.  I've been through the sudden death of a spouse and so I do know what you are talking about.  It's like someone ripped your heart out.

 

It's so very hard to function in the beginning.  I went to sleep every night asking God to take me because I didn't want to be here anymore but time and faith healed that open wound.  I'm so glad that He didn't listen to me because I've had some wonderful moments since my tragedy.  So hang in there because things do get better.

 

Have you gone to grief therapy at all?  That really helped me.  You can call your local hospital and they can direct you to grief therapy classes.

 

Also, don't hesitate to email me.  Under my name at the left of the post you will see a box with a little envelope in it.  Click on it and then type your message.  I will respond.  I know you need a lot of support right now and I really do know what you are going through.  I'll be praying for God to give you peace.  I know He will.

 

Sherrine 

Shannon,

I don't know what to say other than I do believe in prayer and I will pray for you. 

And that when I hear of something so tragic as this, I try and at least learn from it so that your expeience won't go completely without positive result. Oh man, that wording sounds all wrong.  I don't quite know how to word this. What I am trying to say is that knowing your experience will make me take time for my family, stop and smell the roses more, and quit sweating the small stuff.  And just try my very best not to take things for granted. 

And not that I have lost anyone close to me lately, but I was dealing with some turmoil (sp?) in my heart and it made me finally take that leap and get back to God and church. After I did that, I felt like I filled in a big gap that  had in my life. And where as I child I hated going to church, now I find myself craving Sunday so that I can have my time and talk to God in his house. Lord knows I talk to him all the time from mine but there's something that I feel, a deeper sense of connection when I am at church. And I don't know if you belong to church, but I can tell you this one I am going to now would tell me that it's OK to grieve. It's OK to be angry. It's Ok to not understand. And they would love me, wrap their arms around me, pray for me, be quiet if I need them, or talk if I need to talk.  They would be there and pull me through anyway I needed.  If I could I would try and be there for you.  All I can do from here is pray and add you to our prayer list and let the man do his work.

Try and be strong, one breath at a time, one moment at a time, one day at a time.

Sincerely,

Pam

So, so sorry about your loss. I think Sherrine's idea of grief therapy is a good one. Will be praying for you to have peace.

V

Shannon,

I am so terribly sorry for the loss of your dear husband. I wish I could take away your pain. Know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.

God bless.  Alice.

Dear Shannon...

I wondered where you were and I'm so sorry to hear your news. Words don't to a fair job of conveying my sympathy but please know that I am praying for you. I know that feeling you have..."nothing to live for." I felt that way when my son passed away. It feels like it will last forever but be kind to yourself and with time the pain won't be so bad. You will always miss him and there will always be pain in your heart but it will become more bearable. Don't worry about not sleeping in the house. You may never be able to again and that's OK. Do what you need to do to survive...OK?

Do think about talking to your doctor about how you are handling life. He should offer suggestions for counseling, maybe short term medication or he may be someone who is there to listen. With so many people here who love you and are offering up prayers at least you should not feel quite so alone. We are always here for you, Shannon. If you want to email me please do and I can call you if you need someone to talk to.

Warm hugs,
Chutz

Hello Shannon,

We don't know one another but I feel so compelled to send you gentle (((hugs))) and tell you I am very sorry for your loss.

Rose

Shannon, I am so sorry for your loss, I wish there was something I could say that would take the pain away, but I know that only time can make it easier. I will keep you in my prayers and do know that we are here to listen if you need us.
Gentle Hugs
Shirley

Shannon, I am so very sorry for your loss.  I am hoping easier days are ahead for you!!

I saw this yesterday and prayed for you, nothing I say will soften the pain only thing I can offer is prayer which I have for you since yesterday......((hugs))

Well, Shannon, My first thought was that church would be the best place for you to turn. But I ~think~ I could totally understand having had your husband pastor your church would make it an exceptionally hard place to be. Being a woman of God, have you started to maybe see any answers to the reason "why"? I believe everything happens for a reason and that God has a plan. But I also know that it sure is hard sometimes to understand why he plans what he does. And hard to see it at times. Sometimes I don't see the reason for things for years after it happens.

I'm having some minor health issues myself and am having a PCP that is just making way too light of my situation tomorrow so I am heading to a urgent care center for a second opinion tomorrow. I am making a point to be there at the opening at 8am so that I can make sure I am done before church at 11. I want to make a special point to make it to the alter tomorrow and have a good talk with God that he can be closer to you, comfort you, and help you to understand and see you through.


Sincerely,
Pam

Shannon,

I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your husband. May his memory be for a blessing always. My sincere condolenses during this very hard time.

Pam, you mentioned God's plan.  I do believe he knows best.  My dear husband had heart trouble and suffered with congestive heart failure.  He had triple by-pass four years ago.  It was getting to the place where he was taking mega doses of water pills and still smothering and couldn't get the fluid off his heart.  We talked a lot about his future because of his bad health and he was worried that he may have to go on dyalisis.  He couldn't stand the thought of that so I do believe God took him home to heaven before he had to endure that part of his life. 

 

If I didn't have God in my life I don't know what I would do.  I wouldn't call my dh back and think about his suffering.  He is in a far better place than I and doesn't have to worry about any of this anymore. 

 

He has a sister 58 years old that has the mind of a five year old because she had the same thing happen to her when she was 39.  He used to worry because he didn't want to end up like her. 

 

God saw fit to take him out of this world before he had to suffer like she has.  I thank God every day for his not suffering but it doesn't make me miss him any less.  I miss him so much that I'm really down and out and I am trying to get up enough nerve to stay all night here at my home this weekend. 

 

He died in our bed and it was so quickly that it was unbelievable.  This is what makes it so hard on me right now.

 

Please keep me in your prayers and thanks for telling your pastor about me.  The more people praying for me the better. 

 

I'm still begging you all in my fibro family that believe in prayer, to keep remembering me that I will get stronger. 

 

God Bless!

Shannon