okay so I'm a new member here, so hi... although I currently do not have the diagnosis of FM, like all of of here I have been suffering from unexplained relentlessness pain. It's been 3 years this month since the onset of all of my bazaar yet debilitating symptoms. In the beginning I went to the doctor numerous times, getting CT scan, blood tests, Xrays, thyroid test, parasite test... ect. all trying to figure out what was going on with me. All of my tests came back normal so my doctor chalked it up to a case of IBS And Paranoid anxiety... and prescribed me anti anxiety medication and an antispychotic. Eventually I gave up trying to tell people what I was going through because they looked at me like I was going crazy and told me it was all in my head. I knew it wasn't however and that there was something seriously wrong. I had never had any trouble with my physical health before this, I had never even broken a bone.
It all started back in may of 2009. I was 17 years old. I lived with my mother at the time, and had a boyfriend by whom I thought that I had fallen pregnant because I started experiencing many strange symptoms... the main ones being bloating of my abdomen, this went on for a few weeks and I kept taking pregnancy test after pregnancy test because I thought that could be the only thing causing my stomach to bloat like that. In the mean time my anxiety was mounting to extreme proportions because I knew that I was in a terrible spot in my life to have a child. My mother is very psychotic, if you've ever seen the movie "mommy dearest", that is the closest thing I can compare my life to growing up... she was extremely manipulative to me and her and my boyfriend (a drug addict) were fighting and it was complete chaos. I was stuck in this horrible life with these horrible people that I wanted nothing to do with thinking that I'm going to be bringing a baby into the world with that. I was basically going out of my mind with fear. Then one day... I had some of my boyfriends (which of course I regret now) and it catapulted me into an EXTREME panicked state... the pain and tension in my body had been slowly building up during those weeks, and I had started feeling the precursor of what was to come, but when that happened... BAM I had this horrible horrible feeling of pain my body, this deep, painful aching, burning feeling of cold... mainly in my back, my shoulders, the back of my neck, my hips my knees and just this kind of painful feeling of numbness in my extremities (like when you go outside for a long time with your hands in the snow and then you go inside and run warm hot water on it)... and I was like "oh my god what is that?!?! I was like I have to go to the hospital.... right now, somethings wrong!!!!..." I was hysterical it hurt sooooo badly. I had a history of panic attacks and anxiety but nothing even close to that. So I went to the hospital and needless to say I was not pregnant... And no one believed me about
my pain.
And that was the beginning, it never went away after that... and it's been three years... three long years that I dealt with this alone, feeling like I was the only person in the world this was happening to, and I just quite talking about
it... Since then you'd be happy to know I got out of my abusive life and got away from all of those destructive things that were plaguing me in the beginning... but the pain still goes on... I've tried everything, but it will not go away no matter what i do.
May of 2011 I got pregnant (I was married to an amazing man in 2010! :D) and I endured pregnancy on top of the horrible pain.
I had seen some of the commercials about
FM and I kind of made a note in my mind because it talked about
a persistent ache, but really I thought it was something different than it was...
Then I gave birth... with an epidural, That was the first time I had been pain free for 3 years. I had almost forgot what it was like... and after the delivery was over, when it started to wear off I considered begging for another epi because I felt the pain creeping back up on me...
I broke down the next day and talked to someone about
it at the hospital for the first time in 2 and a half years... and they urged me to get the help for it that I need and validated me that it was not all in my head.
So now here I am. I decided to get the courage to do some research again to get an idea of what this may be... I had been so afraid to talk to people about
what I go through for fear of them making me feel like a lunatic again like those doctors before. I stayed silent and have suffered for it. I really feel as if I may have this but even if I don't, at least I won't feel alone anymore in the battle ageanst chronic pain and I thank you all here for that... sharing your stories and being
open does benefit, I know some of you probably feel like a bunch of complainers sometimes talking about
your experiences but I assure you it's not without cause. Humanity is about
kinship... we're meant to share things together and find things we have in common with each other. Each person we can relate to makes us a little more alive than before. So smile at least on account of that, even if it feels like sometimes you want to give up. ♥
So anyway now that you understand a little bit more of where I come from I wanted to know if people with FM are all always tender to the touch... because it seems to be the only main symptom that I am missing...
Here is a list of my symptoms...
Constant Deep muscular Aching in my back, shoulders, neck, mid back, lower back, around the si joints, knees, and face... that waxes and wanes sometimes it will significantly improve for a couple minutes or hours but no longer than that
Extreme stiffness
Extreme Fatigue
Extreme tension
Anxiety-Feels like I'm constantly fighting off a panic attack
Reynauds like symptoms... hands and feet will get pale turn blue... or my legs will sometimes turn kinda pachy red (my family has this too)
Sometimes static nerve type pain...
Sometimes randomly I will have kind of a throbbing pain in different areas of the body for a couple seconds and then it will go away
I have been diagnosed with IBS/chronic constipation/bloating
Sensitivity to light
Sensitivity to cold
I get this feeling like my whole body is like freezing and burning at the same time
mild exema(sp?)
dry skin
dry eyes
vision problems (sometimes goes a little blurry)
headaches
exercise makes it a little better
stress makes it much worse
massage makes it a little better
hot baths makes it a little better
That mind fog that is talked about
...it feels like my mind can't process anything but the pain (I'm really afraid of going out in public due to my lifelong abuse so I walk around completely out of it when I'm away from home. I even walked away from my purse one time.)
feels like my body if off balance
palpitations (not so much any more)
inability to concentrate
when I sleep I sleep for like 10 hours and I still feel like I didn't
dizziness
vertigo sometimes
and the symptoms seem to change back and forth of where I feel the most pain...
now can someone explain to me the tenderness do all people with FM have tenderness to the touch because I don't have a problem really with wearing fabrics or if someone just touches me it doesn't hurt although i am a little bit more sensitive to pressure i guess in specific areas like if someone grabs my arm it hurts, but I have a pretty high tolerance for pain, I always thought it was normal for it to hurt, but people have called me wimpy sometimes when something has happened and I've said owww and they have said things like "that didn't hurt you"... I don't really understand this symptom so if someone could explain this to me it would be very helpful because I really don't want to go back to the doctor again without some idea of what I may have. It's so hard to go anyway I at least want to have a general idea. Thanks
Also if someone knows of something else that this sounds like please let me know... I'm like dying over here...lol
Thank you so much for your time...
~thenewstephie
Post Edited By Moderator (Sherrine) : 5/12/2012 8:35:47 AM (GMT-6)