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Really irritated by people using their condition...

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Posted 1/28/2013 3:08 PM (GMT 0)
As for me, my responsibility is to my discipline, and how well the student engages with that. Do they learn the skill set I am teaching? Do they display competence in the topic? I have the right to expect them to be responsible for their own education. Their engagement is their issue. I am actually pretty engaging as a professor, but I do not see it as my job to enforce. I teach my subject. If you choose to not pay attention that is your choice. Actions, rights, responsibilities, consequences.

I can throw you out of class if you are not conforming to my expectations. I do not have to take your work if it does not conform to my expectations. If you choose to use your cell phone in class, there is a ramification for that. I do not have to, nor will I, talk to your parents. I do not have to pass you, I do not have to give you a second chance. That doesn't mean I won't, it just means that you need to be responsible. Crohns Girl-needs to bring her disability paperwork and talk with me, not throw out reasons why she cannot get the work done.

I have never taught children, and frankly cannot even imagine it. There is so much pressure being brought to bear on teachers. Here in VA, teachers cannot fail students, literally. What is that teaching?
Posted 1/28/2013 6:30 PM (GMT 0)
They started the not failing students in Ohio back in the 70's when I taught school. Now they wonder why kids are actually graduating but can't read!

I taught 9-10 year olds and there is quite a difference to the kids Myself is teaching but I did try to individualize...it's almost necessary at those younger ages. I agree that Crohn's girl needs to bring her paperwork in and that will give Myself a chance to sit down and find out what is really going on with her flare. I personally think if she is really having a rough time that this could be worked around.

My son was ADHD and also borderline dyslexic and he had a few teachers who were rigid. Example.....he knew how to spell all the words assigned to him but couldn't get them down on paper correctly. I quizzed him on the words when he went out the door on spelling test day and he would come home, forlorn, because he misspelled nearly all of them on the test and had to write hundreds of sentences using the words. (I had students like this but I would test them orally to see if they knew how to spell the words.) In high school he was having problems with a subject and was close to failing it. I told him if he studied really hard and passed the test, he would probably pass the course. Just sitting to study was very difficult for him.....was on medication for ADHD, developed tics because of the med but needed to be on it to get through school and then was given a second medication to help with the tics. He was seeing a pediatric neurologist at the Cleveland Clinic at the time. Anyway, he studied really hard for over a week, got a "C" on the test and the teacher chose to fail him anyway. His councelor went through the roof...along with me. That taught him "Why bother?". We now had to struggle with him to study.

As an aside, he did graduate, was taking freshman courses at college, was offered a job in computers because he was highly intelligent when it came to computers. He was hired as a consultant just four months out of high school and has been very successful in the field.

I attended Ohio University and the Hocking River flooded one year. We were told to grab some clothes and get out within five minutes because the water was rising rapidly. They said we would be out of the dorm for about three days AND we had to find someone we could bunk with! We walked out with a carry-on case with clothes in waist deep water and then had to get typhoid shots. Well, the three days turned into 2 1/2 weeks...the second week was finals week. None of us had books because we could not have carried all of them through the flood waters. In college, you can't beg, borrow, or steal a book during finals week. One course I took I had all "A's" on tests, quizzes, and a paper but I got a "C" on the final and that prof gave me a "C" in the course!!! I tried to talk to him about the situation but everything was black and white to him. That taught me all about fairness. Trust me....I have never wished any good on that prof. mad

I guess my telling these life stories is that no matter what job you have...a teacher, a boss, a manager, a parent....it's important to consider people's situations along with maintaining rules, teaching them to handle responsibility as well as teaching one to accept responsibility. We just don't fit in molds and we fibromites know that first hand. Some of us have less pain then others, what works for one doesn't necessarily work for another, and so on. We are thrilled when someone tries to understand our situation. This, for me, has helped me to look at the overall picture now. I can't say I did that when I was younger. Sometimes I wish I could have a "do-over" in life knowing then what I know now. I would have been far more successful, and happier, I think.

Sherrine
Posted 1/29/2013 2:57 AM (GMT 0)
I am waiting for the paperwork. I *want* her to do this. She came to class this am. But no disability papers, and no show during office hours. Yet. I even took my Crohn's books to my office today. Periodically, when students have disclosed chronic illnesses, I have alluded to my own struggles. Maybe that's why I get so miffed when people play the sick card when they aren't. And I really, really try to keep my expectations fair, across the board. Sometimes you have to be harsh in order to be fair.

I am lucky, I think, that I am so very tenacious. Stubborn, some might say. Perhaps this is what keeps me going.... Though others
may not have this quality. I try to be fair, but do know that for
some students, my very focus can be intimidating.

I really hope she comes in soon.
Posted 1/29/2013 3:26 AM (GMT 0)
I agree with you. She does need to bring the paperwork in. My question is why she hasn't done it so far. Is she really having a horrible flare or is she disregarding the rules. If she truly is intentionally disregarding the rules, is quite capable of bringing in her papers, then I would say she is taking advantage of her illness. Yes, we all know people that do that too. Time will tell you that answer. But try not to get yourself upset about her because that will affect your health, too. You definitely don't need that!

Sherrine
Posted 1/29/2013 3:34 AM (GMT 0)
I remember loving college, the freedom, the nearly unlimited choices. I could study...or not...no one cared but me. No teachers calling my parents, never being forced to finish a semester with a teacher I didn't click with, being able to ask my fellow students which teachers were the best and working my schedule around them. I had some AMAZING professors. I remember one English class where I felt so incredibly confused, I couldn't understand what he wanted with the homework, I couldn't understand what the assignments were. I dropped that class and took it again with another professor that taught the way I understood.

I have hearing problems and I could've chosen to navigate disability services. Instead I chose to get to class early enough to snag a seat in the front row, preferably on the right side. If the professor allowed I'd tape the lectures, so if I missed something then I had another chance. I was able to make all of my own accommodations so I didn't need help. But if I had needed help, I would've gotten it.

That was what I enjoyed about college so much, and maybe that is what your student needs to explore more. You two may not be a good match. She may be in a bad time in her life and need to take a semester off to work on her health. Maybe she needs to switch to a major that doesn't demand so much class time, one where she can read the book at home and show up for the tests.

I don't think you are being unreasonable, Myself. You have a participation based class, therefore the student needs to show up. You've laid out your expectations in the syllabus, she needs to read it. She knows she has a disability, she needs to navigate disability services. She'll need to learn this now, because this is something she'll need to do for herself when she gets a job. College is the best place to learn these skills, since you usually have a chance for a "do-over" that you don't get in the real world.
Posted 1/29/2013 5:44 AM (GMT 0)
She may be gaming the system.
She may not be.
She may not know the rules.
Ignorance of the rules/law is no excuse.
She will have to face the repercussions of her illness.

Then again,
I'm assuming she's young.
Many of us may share her condition by name,
BUT...
We do not live in her body.

Maybe meet in the middle somehow.
Posted 1/29/2013 4:03 PM (GMT 0)
Hm. She may not fully understand disability services paperwork, or that I am waiting for her to step forward. I am going to send her an email, again, asking her to stop by and talk. She may have ignored the first one I sent.

My school serves traditionally underserved populations, students who for various reasons have had some difficulty getting to college, may be first generation college, may not have the best records, or may be coming to college with a whole bunch of
problems- children, deaths by violence, bad neighborhoods,
violence in their own background.

Before I came here, I was a lot more willing to have rules but bend them. Unfortunately, rules that are malleable are not what most of my students need. Too many profs at my own school feel many. Of the kids have already had a lot of problems, so are easier on them. The poor dear, I will hold your hand, and applaud your every assignment. Sometimes, that is good. Others, like me, know that the world is harsh, and that expecting less than the average is doing nothing to address the very real concerns of preparing people for life. Hold the standard and explain what you expect.

My classes are full, I have little problem with chronic absenteeism, and many students appreciate having someone who will tell them the truth.

I am going to prod her a bit. She will do what she is going to do. I really hope her paperwork is in process. That being said, I can barely move today. I suspect that my tramadol is not functioning properly.
Posted 1/29/2013 4:45 PM (GMT 0)
I hope she gets her work in and that everything works out for you. I am sorry you are in pain. I hope that you feel better soon...

You sound like a very good and compassionate teacher. I applaud you for that!

Hugs, Karen
Posted 1/29/2013 6:12 PM (GMT 0)
Myself, with those types of students they probably do need the rules, guidance, and strength you are giving them.  They probably have not been taught responsibility either and that's what you are trying to teach them.  It's a tough love approach and that's wonderful.  I do agree that the Crohn's girl might not understand what she needs to do about the paperwork.  I hope this all can be worked out for both of your benefits.

 

I am sorry you are struggling today and hope you start to feel better as the day wears on.

 

Sherrine

Posted 1/30/2013 10:37 AM (GMT 0)
Just a random thought (second day back at work... brain smooshed) but this girl might also have been brought up with the "your illness is private," mindset. Or she might just feel awkward talking about her symptoms and avoids it at all costs. It's not an excuse, but it's a thought.   (Yet another realisation due to the woman at work. I just don’t talk about my illness, even when I should. She sent my poor boss three text messages today to fill him in on her energy levels… At 8am she was SO tired she couldn’t get out of bead to eat breakfast. At 12 she’d managed a short walk. At 2, she was feeling quite low again so decided to go lay on her bed for a while. Whereas my boss tends to forget I’m sick because I don’t mention it.)   Also, be grateful you’re actually allowed to talk to her about her illness. Our new regs state we have to have a puffer/spacer for each asthmatic child in the first aid room and classroom, and the out of hours room if your child goes to OSHC at all during the year… parents don’t want to buy three puffers/spacers, so we’ve had a remarkable amount of children “cured” from their asthma this year, and a LOT of new parents have pulled the confidentiality card out of their butts. There was a Dad in the office yelling about his daughters right to privacy this afternoon because the office lady had called to check asthma/allergy status because he just didn’t fill in that part of the enrolment form.   TAFE is worse. Legally you don’t have to tell your teacher your name. You can be known by your student number if you so choose. (My editing teacher pointed that out to her class. She brought in all the legislation and policies to back herself up, and then suggested that we refuse to tell another teacher our names… Turns out she does it every year just to annoy the other teachers.) If you had an illness you went through the Disability Service people, and gave them all the doctors letters. They put the IMPACT of your illness in your file, but not the name of the illness. They’d set up your Consideration of Disadvantage, and the teacher followed it. No doctors letter was to go directly to the teachers, they all had to go to Disability Services.   It was a good system, but it was only as good as the people who worked in the Disability Service office… and unfortunately they eventually put an idiot in charge of it.
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