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Restaurants, Sound, and Coping Skills

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Fibromyalgia
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Posted 6/18/2014 5:26 PM (GMT 0)
Good morning,

Yesterday my husband and I stopped by a local restaurant for breakfast on the way home from picking up my meds. At first it was ok, but within about 10 minutes I began to feel nausea and the sounds in the room, lots of people talking, was totally overwhelming to me. Never a problem pre fibromyalgia. My husband, fortunately, suggested he get my headphones from the car and listen to music with my iPhone. I did, and put on relaxing spa music. Although I could hear the noises still, I think I blocked some of them out with the soothing music.

During the months prior to my diagnosis, I had become ultra sensitive to loud
radio or tv in the house. I am a retired professional musician and so have very highly trained ears. But the sounds coming in were a cacophony of noise that I physically could not tolerate.

This weekend we are invited to a family birthday party for our 5 yr old grandson, and most of it will be outside so Im thinking of going for an hour or two. But what happened yesterday gives me reason to pause.

Does this sound haha familiar to anyone? And if so, coping suggestions?

Thank you,
Bella
Posted 6/18/2014 5:42 PM (GMT 0)
People laugh when I describe it as a scene from a horror movie in the 50's, the sounds enter my brain but don't stop, they keep bouncing around until I want to scream and pull out my hair

Music and my ear pods are the only solution that I've so far

#8 offspring graduates from high school today, I MUST attend, I know how loud and confusing it will be to my brain - MP3 player is charged and in my purse, my 14 year old will walk and sit next to me, just in case...

I've found that I can deal with the sounds (for a while) if I don't try to really hear/focus on anything - having a conversation in a loud/busy room doesn't work for me

Happy birthday to your grandson!
Posted 6/18/2014 5:55 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you! Do you use ear pods that are attached by a wire/connector or blue tooth? I am asking because even with my husband, it felt odd to have something so obvious to others!

Bella
Posted 6/18/2014 6:02 PM (GMT 0)
I use old school wire and don't worry what others think any more ;)

Sometimes just having one pod in place is enough for me - I discovered that on a day when I was too lazy to take out my hearing aid

I'm also sensitive to what ear pods I can tolerate, some cause all the wrong kinds of pressure in my ear
Posted 6/18/2014 6:09 PM (GMT 0)
Haha, yes, maybe not caring is the way to go! I did find a pair of inexpensive bluetooth wireless ear buds but they have a wire that goes behind your neck I think.

Bella

Post Edited (BellaMarina) : 6/18/2014 12:27:19 PM (GMT-6)

Posted 6/18/2014 7:04 PM (GMT 0)
I noticed that at times.that kind of noise gets to me and other times i am fine with it.. So i think its when i am flared up that i am more sensitive to it...

I was. Exhausted after choosing new appliances..so i picked a restaurant that is usually quiet..for a quick dinner..

I have never been able to stand noise directly in my ears..so never use ear buds...i used to be sensitive to bright lights..but less so as i get older..strong smells that are overwhelming, can make me very nauseous..and very sensitive to some medications, and sometimes even the fillers that are in generic drugs..i take the ones i can

So its safe to say that just as we are sensitive to pain, also many other environmental things we can be hypersensitive to...
Posted 6/18/2014 7:16 PM (GMT 0)
This is an issue. I carry earplugs wherever I go. It can be very overwhelming.

I do notice that when I am close to or/ am flaring, it is a lot worse.

Music played over speakers in public spaces makes me nuts.
Posted 6/18/2014 10:18 PM (GMT 0)
Oh places where the wait staff are all kids , play their music blaring..i have been known to stay 5 minutes and leave
Posted 6/18/2014 11:15 PM (GMT 0)
I use Xanax for this. I got so bad in Walmart once I had to leave. Now I can handle it, but then I couldn't. All the sounds were blended together, kids screaming. Maybe more of a mental health issue for me than the fibro. But my tolerance for a lot of things isn't the same as before.
Posted 6/18/2014 11:26 PM (GMT 0)
At certain times, noises can be overwhelming to me, especially at places like loud restaurants where many people are talking or the music is cranked up WAYYYYY too loud (especially annoying when trying to concentrate on a grocery list or such).

Other times, it doesn't bother me as much. But when it does bug me, I try to leave ASAP or I know I'll end up eventually with a headache and/or stressed.

I love the idea of listening to 'your' music, instead. Bright idea!! :)
Posted 6/19/2014 3:03 AM (GMT 0)
Xanax! Now there's an idea!!

Bella
Posted 6/19/2014 3:05 AM (GMT 0)
I just remembered that about 2 weeks before I was diagnosed, I went with my husband to his friend's 60th party. They turned up the music SO loud, and it was in a bar, that I could not stand it. I put in my headphones, but even those couldn't drown out the noise. Left after an hour.

Bella
Posted 6/19/2014 5:22 AM (GMT 0)
I've had this problem for so many years. When I was newly pregnant, we were at a party, and the music hurt my ears (and no one else's) - I had to hide my head under the bed where everyone put their coats!

We had to leave a concert we'd paid good money for once, with me in tears.

I'm always the one turning the tv up because I can't make out what people are saying, then down because the music gets too loud, and of course, muting all the commercials...everyone else just goes with whatever comes on, but I can't.

Laura, I know what you mean about doing ok in a busy room if you don't really try to focus on a conversation...focusing in so much noise is exhausting! I'm having problems right now, because both our daughters (and one boyfriend) are back living with us, and the simultaneous conversations drive me batty! No one gets why I become so agitated.

I'll have to try having my own music to listen to. I know music helps me concentrate and stay alert when I'm driving.

Debbie
Posted 6/19/2014 6:34 AM (GMT 0)
I try to stay in quiet places if I can.
I get aggevated if it's too noisy.
Posted 6/19/2014 8:08 PM (GMT 0)

 My DH and I were just talking the other day about a dinner we went to about 4 yrs ago - ONCE!!!


 A few ppl we knew said it was pretty good, so we tried it one evening. OMG!!


 We hit the Trifecta! It was August - Hot & humid. They had the a/c on way too high ( I always bring a jacket w/ me, just in case), the music was way too loud, & the food was meh.


 We asked the waitress if they could turn the music & the a/c down. She said the mgr wasn't there, so she couldn't do anything about it.


 I asked her for take out boxes.


 Most times now, if we go someplace, we order, pick up, & take it home.


 I've always had a problem w/ loud music, and cold temps. It sets me so badly, it can take hrs, even days, to get over it.


 God bless.  Alice. 

Posted 6/20/2014 4:34 AM (GMT 0)
I have nine grandkids and even before fibro ranging from 17 down to 3, when they were or most of them were here at one time after a while it always gets to me. Now after a while when they get loud and just being kids laughing and playing and fussing sometimes, I am exhausted and hurting badly. Love them all dearly and I feel quilts about it but I am so glad when the house is quiet. I just go flop down on the bed and try to revive.

Irish Rose, I even before Fibro used to take a light jacket when I go in restaurant or even grocery store. I don't go out much to eat out or shop.
Posted 6/20/2014 2:11 PM (GMT 0)
Alice:  We 'do' takeouts quite often.  Much more relaxing eating at home, watching dvds like "Andy Griffith" or "Leave It To Beaver" than loud, obnoxious music to the point where one can't even carry on a conversation! shocked
Posted 6/20/2014 4:13 PM (GMT 0)
I have an inner ear disorder, so I always carry earplugs in my purse. They have saved my sanity more than once.

I have also gotten to the point that I don't go to noisy restaurants anymore, unless I go on an off time. Not only is it nerve wracking, but I don't want to pay a lot for a meal if the atmosphere isn't enjoyable. We left a moderate priced chain restaurant (which is considered a nice meal for us, lol) the other day because their pagers weren't working, and every couple of minutes they would call for people over the intercom. No way was I going to pay at least $30 for our meals having to sit and listen to that the entire time. I would rather just go to the nice quiet Wendy's nearby and have a baked potato.
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