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Posted 6/14/2018 5:49 AM (GMT 0)
Hello everyone, It’s late and I am not sleeping. Either pain and insomnia or insomnia and pain.....
I was just thinking about how fibro changes who you are.
I like to cook. It is something I can do when I can’t do allot else......that is if I am just dealing with Lupus...but if it’s fibro I can’t seem to even do that. It takes too much concentration and energy.
I haven’t been able to do a proper pantry shop in weeks so my usually full stores are low.
I like to keep a full pantry just for times like this but this time it has gone so long that even those stores are low.

I am so disappointed, my dear aunt called and is coming for a visit with her daughters to look at my late Mother’s photo album. They were close sisters so I told her she could take what ever pictures of their young lives to enjoy.
I want to have a nice tea. Aunt Bea deserves it, she was my dear Mom’s best friend.
I would like to spoil them With finger sandwiches, and such and pretty desserts you know a proper pretty ladies tea with linens, China, the works. But boy I am having a time even trying to plan a menu.
I just hate that this illness changes who you are.

I end up having to scale things down so much it’s noticeable. Not that my Aunt would ever care, but I do.
What do you do about entertaining? Have any favourite fibro-flare recipes to share?
Thanks for listening. Tuffymason
Posted 6/14/2018 12:16 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Tuffymason: I could have written your post! It's hard for us to scale back when we're used to going 'full throttle' in life. I've had fibro for years, and this is still a battle for me, almost every day.

As far as entertaining your aunt, maybe you could keep it simple and pick up something from the deli--something that you might not normally have. Subs? Or maybe if there is more of a specialized food store nearby, try something from there. Or, is there some little shop where you could both eat out together?

Alternatively, there's nothing wrong with cold cuts on one or two kinds of bread, maybe a box of fancy crackers, and something like a simple punch to drink. There are many possibilities, and surely your aunt should understand your health issues. If she loves you and wants to see you, that's enough, right? The visit is what counts. Even if you would order a pizza, I'm betting she would understand.

I so share your frustration about scaling things down, though. I'm planning a simple meal this weekend for family--sloppy joes (which will be in the slow cooker), potato salad (which I'll start making the night before), a bean mixture I can throw together, and an apple dessert which only needs "assembly." Oh, and a jar of pickles! And, I've already "warned" everyone my house will not be spotless (not that it ever is!!), as I've been pulling weeds in the garden. But they already know that...

When I cook for relatives, I do as much as I can (cutting up, etc.) the day before. Paper plates are used--the china only gets used for holidays, and when I do use it, I wash the plates and cups a few days before.

about food shopping: More and more places have home delivery options. That might be something to consider.

Honestly, this is one of the most frustrating things about fibro to me. I'm like a racehorse in a turtle's body. But it's slowly teaching me patience and what really matters. That part is good!

I hope you have a great visit with your aunt! smile
Posted 6/14/2018 3:45 PM (GMT 0)
I so agree. The thing is it's not other's who have a problem with whatever I get done for whenever the time is. It's me that it bothers. I get so embarrassed as my home is ok but not like I like it to be. No washing drapes anymore or scrubbing walls or... And, if I do get it more accomplished than my body can handle I pay for it.

I am trying hard to remember that there are healthy people with much messier homes, that people come to see me not my home, that I'm crazy to waste life on something that I really can't do anything about anyway, I should enjoy what I can. It is so very hard to do, though as it's hard to adjust expectations from what we were and what we are!

I also understand that it's what you want to do and can't that's so bothersome. That you want it to be special and it hurts when you can't make it just like you want it. But, I agree with Luv thoughts and her ideas. I doubt your Aunt will mind at all.

Perhaps you can wash the china, only using what you have to, not all of it. You could do that days ahead if you can cover it or something. A pretty setting is makes even the boring food look nice. Could part of the foods be prepared ahead, maybe froze or something where you really can do it ahead of time?

Is there a fancy bakery near by? Do you have a friend who could pick a few things up for you, better yet help you prepare as well. Maybe go to the bakery and maybe a sandwich shop for you. Do you have pretty glasses that can be used for iced tea or something? That can be bought pre-made even. And, as Luv says foods can be delivered as well as take out food if you choose.

I've finally gotten to the point where I can ask for help, sometimes. I still struggle with that and I'm a long way from doing it like I could but when I do I end up feeling better for the event.

Wishing you an awesome visit.
Posted 6/15/2018 5:04 PM (GMT 0)
Entertaining is hard, the kids are coming for fathers day..but we will go out to a restaurant and come back for dessert and gifts...

I am cleaning like a fiend.. lol.. but i overdid it yesterday and am having to dial it back today..

When i am pushing..i work a while and then go sit for 15 mins then move on to the next job..
I also cook this way..i will prep, then sit some, then go back for the next round..i have had to pace this way particularly since a bad fall last year..hey its slower but things still get done.. my husband helps also..

He washed windows yesterday and cleaned up the deck while i worked inside..

Back to work
Posted 6/17/2018 8:14 PM (GMT 0)
Hanginin, I hope I’m not too late with my suggestions to accomplish you English tea with very little work. My best friend is from England and I think I’ll do this the next time I have her over for lunch so thanks for the great idea!

I would serve three or four different kinds of sandwiches. Plan on one sandwich per person. Some suggestions would be dilled cream cheese and English cucumber sandwiches, egg salad sandwiches, tuna salad sandwiches with finely chopped celery, and watercress and butter sandwiches. The egg salad and tuna salad can be made the day before. The English cucumber could be sliced thinly and blotted in a paper towel and put in the fridge the morning of the tea. about an hour before their arrival, cut the crusts off your bread and prepare your sandwiches and cut them in the small triangles. Once on the serving dish, cover with a slightly damp paper towel/s to help hold the moisture in and pop them in the fridge. I have a three level serving dish for Christmas cookies. Since it has Christmas trees on it, I would cover each layer with a pretty paper doily while putting together the serving dish. The sandwiches would go on the bottom level.
Just a suggestion in case you have a serving dish like that.

My local grocery bakery carries mini scones. They come in blueberry and also cranberry. Call your grocery bakery to see if your store carries them. They would be perfect for the tea. If you live near a Publix Grocery store, that’s where I buy mine.

For dessert you can buy frozen creme puffs. Thaw some out the night before and keep in the fridge. I’d also buy a Sara Lee Cream Cheesecake, slightly thaw it and cut small pieces in triangular shapes. You can get mini muffin paper cups and put these two desserts in them...or at least the cheese cake dessert. Then dot the serving plates with the gorgeous fresh strawberries that are in season right now. This would be a colorful as well as a beautiful presentation with very little work!

Be sure to have good tea...including at least one caffeine-free or herbal tea. You would be happy to serve this and your Aunt Bea and cousins would love it. This is not overwhelming because 2/3’ can be purchased ready to go and the sandwiches take very little energy to make. I hope this helps you or at least gives you some ideas!

Sherrine
Posted 6/18/2018 4:25 AM (GMT 0)
Well, thanks so much for the posts. You are inspiring. It is about expectations.
I had a dear Uncle who has passed now, but when he struggled with just the same thing I
post about I would tell him the worst part of getting old is remembering what you could used to do....
that he should always cherish and remember those days but now you need to be thankful for what you
can do today. I will try to heed my own words!

I am so thankful for the ideas and the menu ideas. It is a perfect recipe for a lovely day.
Sometimes it’s the brain fog for me not so much the energy at least at first.
My mind’s eye seems to get blocked and I just can’t not seem to invision the end result,
what needs to be done and what is sensibly doable for me.
....and the trying so hard to think it through that it ends up zapping me physically too.
Posted 6/18/2018 5:21 AM (GMT 0)
We celebrated yesterday since my son in law works sundays..

And although we went the easy way..i was exhausted all day today.

I try to accept that when i am pushing..my body will push back..and have to allow myself the down time.

Still we had a lovely family day and we cherish each of them😊

Our youngest is thinking about buying a condo and are encouraging us to think about the same complex..
We are an hour and a half away at this point..

Its tempting, ha , they are incredible people, but moving scares me..oh to be on one level sounds nice though😊
Posted 6/19/2018 9:46 PM (GMT 0)
I'm happy it went well for you and that's it's over. Yes, one has too choose the battle, do what you want and pay for it or don't do what you want and have to pay for it. Usually do what you want is what I choose but then I hate it when and I'm down and out for a few days.
Posted 6/20/2018 12:07 AM (GMT 0)
So glad to hear everything turned out okay. So many of us here seem to be in the same "boat": we don't want to overdo it, but so often it's easy to do just that. I hope everyone had a good day to celebrate.

Lj: Moving is a daunting thought! It comes to my mind occasionally as my age creeps up. So many pros and cons, and yes, change isn't always easy, but sometimes works out great.

Lendi: "Choose the battle"---exactly! And it seems inevitably we become pros at that, having this medical condition. At least maybe we get better doing that as time goes on!

I hope everyone is feeling okay this week. We just can't seem to get past either extreme heat or storms here, but tomorrow sounds really gorgeous. Relief on the way! smile
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