Ponder upon these questions

Okay...so I can't go work in the yard today because I'm having severe pain in my whachamacallit...you know what I mean.  The Butt cheek thingy that runs down your hip, thigh, knee, leg...begins with an 'S'.  Anyway,  I have been searching the globe for answers to these deep, meaningful questions that plague me night and day as I have nothing better to do.  Please use your fibro brain and help me solve these earth shattering mysteries.

What the heck does 'all the live long day' mean...as in  'I've been working on the railroad?'

Why in movies, don't they ever have screens on the windows..you always see the curtains blowing seductively  in the breeze and a moon in the back ground...where's the mosquitos and spiders etc?

Speaking of movies...how come they never answer the phone until it rings about ten times?  And furthermore...they never say good bye when they are done with the call...they just hang up? 

Oh...and they always order a five course meal and never eat it...just pick at it with a fork then get up and leave.  What???

I wanna know about those 'plugs' that cover the screws holding the toilet down.  Do any of you have them still intact?  They fall off the minute you try to wash the stupid edges of the toilet.  Oh, the humanity.  I hate it when that happens.

Why does the hubby leave three mini wheats in the box...I go get the milk and bowl...spoon then pick up the box which is in fact empty?  This behavior should be studied in depth by somebody with a big long name and three degrees from Harvard.

Why is my OCD 85 year old neighbor scrubbing her mail box with a Brillo pad?  Doesn't she know this destroys my self esteem and I am compelled to do something productive even though my fat fanny wants to stay put on my soft chair cushion?  It's a geriatric conspiracy, I tell you...It's Saturday so this is the day she sweeps the street and power washes her bird feeders.  Really..I'm not kidding.

I'm done.  My fibro brain is fried.  My fanny hurts.  "Live long day..."  really...what IS that all about?

Huggies

Donna

 

BUZZ!!! "The answer is: What is Sciatica?!?"

(I know you dont pronounce it this way, but I remember this cause my daughter's name is Sky and...well...at 19 she can be a pain in the butt! hahaha)

oh please! don't get me started on husbands! I could sit here all day writing about pet peeves.

Donna, once again, you are HILARIOUS! Thanks for the chuckles!
gentle hugs
Miriam

Well, Donna, I've been pondering your questions all the live long day.    Here are my brilliant responses. 

 

Question #1, first of all "all the live long day" sounded better than "all the $***  %*&#  day" in the song I've Been Working On the Railroad.     

 

Questions #2, the mosquitoes and spiders are not in the  actor's union so they can't work in the movies so they don't need screens at the windows.  Simple!    

Question #3, the actors are so blinded by the lights that they can't find the phone until it's rung 10 times.  They are also on a time limit per scene so they just hang up and figure the other party could figure out  they were saying "good-bye".    

Question #4, when it comes to the five course meal, have you seen how skinny these people are?  They must clatter when they walk!  You can't be skinny like that if you eat...especially if you have to do the scene over and over again.  Besides, by that time, the food is yucky cold!    

Question #5, the plugs over my toilet screws stay in place.  One is cracked but it is still in place.  Maybe you should stop kicking the toilet to get it to stop running.  Just changing the flapper works better.    

Question#6, your beloved hubby left three mini wheats in the box because he loves his family.  There is one for you and one for each of your two dogs.  Simple!  Quit your griping and be thankful! 

 

Question #6, your neighbor scrubs her mailbox because it is dirty.  I personally use Clorox and water for my mailbox and it's easier than scrubbing it.  As far as sweeping the street, perhaps that poor soul was a street sweeper when she was younger.  And, Vesty, you are supposed to keep bird feeders clean so the birds don't get diseases.    

So, my sweet Donna, I hope you can rest now.  You won't have to fry your brain anymore because Sherrine has come to your rescue!  Have a restful evening on your fat fanny!    

Sherrine

 

And in movies, they never say "hello", they just talk for a second and hang up.

Look carefully if you are a fan of Two and a Half Men.  It's a bazillion dollar house on the Ocean in Malibu and they don't have a dishwasher.  Not good for resale...not good at all.

Huggies

Donna

What great entertainment!  Sure beats television!

Sherrine

Marlee, you smarty pants you!  I didn't know it was a hypenated word.  You girl...should be in Mensa, if you aren't already.  Now...why is it again that a person would power wash a bird feeder? Germs?  Hmmmmm.

Huggies

Donna

LOL! You all are too much fun. This is so much better than any news or comedy program.

I do so love you guys. I thought äll the live - long day, meant they'd work all day unless they died before the day was over. Silly me. As far as those plugs on the toilet, well, just don't touch them. You're obviously a clean freak. I just give them a blast of aresol, lysol or clorox, and work around them. I do know what you mean though, I was visiting a friend once and leaned a little to the left to reach the TP, lo and behold, I went head first into bath tub with my pants around my knees, too embarassed to call for help. Spent some time hanging there pondering why the mosquitoes can't get into the actor's guild, and why whenever the phone rings on the TV, I run outside to answer it.