Sort of sad

I got on fb this morning and saw that a group of friends (we have all known eachother since grade school) had met at another friends house for a thirty-one party. (those cute handbags!!) The gal hosting the party is a sales rep and has a fun party launching the fall products every year. I was invited last year and spent lots of money LOL It was a fun time. But I didn't get invited this year. I asked why and my friend first apologized profusely for hurting my feelings then said she didn't invite me because she knows I'm always "sick" with my diseases. :-(

I really hate being left out and I hate even more that the diseases/conditions I have are now preventing me from being invited to interact with my friends.

Sorry, I guess I needed to vent.

I'm so sorry!  That really had to hurt you.  She probably thought you wouldn't hear about it, too.  BAD. But, this is exactly why I do not discuss my illness with friends.  They truly don't understand and then an opinion is formed. 

 

I can talk with my children because they do understand as much as possible and that is a blessing.  I also will vent occasionally on this forum but that's about all I talk about how I feel.  I just work on helping myself feel better.  That's all I can do.

So, we do understand on this forum and are here for you to get things off your chest and also for help, too.  Reserve the good times for your friends  Don't discuss illness or how you feel.  If they see you limping or something and ask you, I would just say that you are fine and change the subject.  It's a shame we have to do this but lets face it.  If we didn't have fibro we wouldn't understand either!  So go and enjoy yourself and your friends.  This is a good time to put fibro on the back burner and I just bet you won't miss any more invitations, either.

 

Sherrine  

 

MommaKiki, I know how badly that hurt, my own family has done things like that to me and I remind them it would have cost them nothing to ask. I am sure the occasional outing is not anything special to people with no ailments but to us who actually suffer they mean so much to us.

Some people just do not think, I am sorry your friend just does not get it yet.

I think people can be well meaning, but really not understand.

A friend last year told me I really should go out and get a job so I wouldn't have to think at all about my fibro! I almost fell over and wow--was I irritated (but I kept my mouth shut). But at that time, she was in some stressful situations with work, her husband, and some of her family members, so I think she just sort of dumped her frustrations on me.

There are those who understand and those who don't. I've explained my fibro and neuro conditions in depth so many times that I've decided not to repeat myself to those I know have been told. So, if they ask me, I just say I'm 'about the same' because my health rarely changes.

I try to get to those events I can, but sometimes I find it's better to wait until the day, then instantly plan a quick and easy gathering--even going to a cheaper restaurant or having a picnic. Those 'instant' gatherings can be really fun! Just phone and see who is available.

BTW, I would be sad, too, under the circumstances you mentioned. But just dust yourself off and keep looking ahead and remember your fibro pals here DO understand. :)