I'm really fed up!

I live in a house with 3 other men, my husband, son and father in law.I have always been the one to clean the house, cook the meals, and work. Recently I redid the kitchen and had to rip up 2 layers of carpet and one layer of old tile. I painted the cabinets the wall and laid down a new floor, I went on to finish painting the rest of the house. I have asked my husband to help with cooking and told him I would teach him what he needed to know. He has gotten better but I still do the majority of the cooking. My husband has 2 injured elbows so he isn't working and my son can't find a job. I'm amazed I couldn't figure out why I was so tired. It's no wonder,I do more then anyone else in this house. We are also trying to help my husbands dad who has alztimers.

I'm just so tired of asking my husbad to do more. my Father in law isn't

to bad yet but he wont do a darn thing around here. I so angry and I know the stress of this is not good for me. I have done as much as I can to get more help and it doesn't happen. I hate when dishes are piled up in the sink and so I will deal with them, and my  husband always says" I was going to get those ". When were you going to get them when football season is over. I just needed to vent I have alot going on and feel like I have the world on my sholders!

 I forgot to mention I'm having a horrible fibo day which is making me cranky but at the same time I feel I have a right to be. I need my familys help not lazyness!!!  

 

I combined the two of your posts and deleted the other one.  I figured you meant to put this behind your first post.  I hope you don't mind.  But we have a lilmit on bandwidth and it effects the number of threads we can have.  Thank you for understanding.  hugs, karen...

Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 10/7/2012 1:46:40 PM (GMT-6)

Sounds like your son should really be stepping up his game if he wants to continue to live rent and expense free. Your husband should as well since he is not working either, but since he does have an injury, I'm not sure what his capabilities are. I would frankly just lay down the law with your son. I'm assuming he pays for nothing since he has no job so he MUST contribute in other ways. Essentially, his "rent" could be a list of set chores that he HAS to do. As for hubby, I would try to calmly state to him that you don't appreciate his lack of support especially since he has so much time on his hands. Frankly, I find boys don't care as much about housework and will just let things go if not pushed.

Yep, they don't see dirt. They don't mind it as much. They also want us to go on and on in praise when they do the tiniest task to help. lol!

Lisa sometimes it seems like we are speaking to ourselves I have vented about similar circumstances but our lives are so unique what works for one of us might do the exact opposite for others.

I have stopped worrying about making sure our home is clean enough for others, I am more concerned that it is clean enough for me. I try to dust, do floors, change bedding once a week.

When this started I was on a roll I had just bought all the paint to reprint my living room, kitchen, and hallways. I still have it I have tried a few times when pain levels were liveable to prep the walls but that always brings on a breathing episode so have had to accept I can not do it.

I have recently put my foot down and within the next week or two I will be hiring a maid service. Yes I have a choice I could continue finding it harder to breathe everyday or get some real help in. Hubby had a fit when I told him because the maid service will cost more than he makes per hour but I gave him a chance to help, he would rather relax and drink beer, watch Simpsons anything else but bend over and pick up the socks he peels off and leaves on the floor.

I live in my home with hubby, his 24 yr old son and his 20 yr old son just moved out. They do not get it, I have asked hubby to have heart to heart with boy because I cook meals every night and he shows up occasionally and just when I stop and cook for 2 he unexpectedly shows up and has invited his gf too. I made hubby order out last time I was too upset.

I suggest researching a maid service, a handyman service and telling your hubby you need to hire help and son can start paying his way I know it's tough finding a job but its even harder when you are not looking for one. You can try the list thing it worked here for awhile until someone decided it was fun to draw all over it so it could not be read, imagine that!

I truly hope you get things solved and feel free to vent, rant, do whatever it takes to blow off some of the negative vibes that you are living in.

You have gotten good advice. I, too, went on strike. It only lasted a day and a half because my husband decided it was better to give a helping hand than having to do it all himself.

If you husband won't help with meals, just fix something for yourself only. Let them figure it out. Maybe then they'll help you when asked.

Sherrine