Doc says ignore symptoms

Hi everyone, I'm fairly new here. In a nutshell, for the last 6 years, I kept pushing myself further and trying to ignore what I was feeling. In reality, I felt lazy and tired and growing stupid as I kept forgetting the most basic things. But I kept it all inside.

I have 3 children and a husband who is as driven (maybe moreso) than me. We all work hard and play hard. But slowly I stopped playing because I just couldn't. I managed to get all my obligations done, work, feed the kids (most of the time), and somewhat clean the house. But then I was done. I skipped the family outings to the pool, the park, and nature walks, opting to 'be lazy' instead. In my mind, it's ok to be lazy, but not ok to admit to being sick.

So, in my mind, I was barely surviving and just not quite good enough. That all came to a head crashing down this past March, when my body just decided to shut down. I became so exhausted that I couldn't function. I couldn't work. I couldn't do the shopping, cook, and eat all in the same day. I couldn't hold up my arms long enough to brush my teeth, do my hair, and put on make up all at the same time. Well, my head, neck, and shoulders were in constant pain, so I just cut my hair off, and quit wearing make up. So that problem settled, right?

And my hubby is so supportive and patient. He started letting me know how he appreciated the small things, like me fixing coffee for him. After 20 years of marriage, it's the small things that count in big ways. So that gave me a boost. I started getting happy for the smallest accomplishments. I started noticing how pretty the trees are changing colors. I started to actually be happy, for me.

And then my GP tells me to ignore what I'm feeling, wake up every morning, force a smile, and push past whatever I think I can feel and\or do. So again, I'm not good enough. How can he not know that for me to just show up in his office with a smile on my face is already me winning my struggle for the day?

How can I raise my children and praise them that their best is exactly good enough and perfect if I can't believe it for myself?

And this is after a spinal puncture, and the neurologist telling me I am showing all the symptoms for fibro (but she couldn't confirm because that is for the rheumatologist) and I have hyperreflexia. I already know I'm hypersensitive.
I just needed to get that off my chest in an encouraging environment with people who understand. Thanks for listening to my rant.
C

Post Edited (czjaba) : 10/21/2016 7:01:48 AM (GMT-6)

Thanks, Sherrine, for your kind response.

The tests have ruled out all sorts of things like MS, lyme, boreliosis (sp?), lupus, among others. I do have hypothyroidism, but taking Eurthyrox (sp?) with good result. Blood work all comes back normal.

Next week I have an MRI scheduled and I really think everything will come back normal on that too.

What I have to work on is the waiting time. If I don't know what's wrong, I can't work on fixing it. And if I ignore what's wrong, I won't be able to fix it. And that's what bothers me. I get irritated extremely easily, but with rest breaks when I need them, I am able to be somewhat normal. (At least when my family is around.) I take it easy when they are all at work and school and that allows me to be ok with them. But if I work too much around the house and push my limits, like my GP said, then I'm too irritated, tired, and cranky to help with homework and supper. My family are more important to me than that and they deserve better.

Btw, I love the 2Tim verse, one of my favorites.

I would find a different doctor too.
I went to a neurologist recently for tingling in my arms and hands.
After seeing him scratch his head for almost a year he decided I had cubical tunnel syndrome. Pinched nerve in elbows.
When I told him about my rheumatologist diagnosing me with fibromyalgia several years ago he scoffed and said there's no such thing.
I never mentioned my fibro again and was glad when he dismissed me when he decided my cubical tunnel syndrome wasn't bad enough for surgery.

Why are you seeing this arrogant doctor? I'd try to fine a rheumy that has a good reputation and rapport with their patients. Rapport and respect is very important to have with your doctor.

I won't see doctors like that. I was referred to a top specialist at the Cleveland Clinic for an other problem I had. This doctor was so full of himself and was totally rude. He embarrassed me in front of a student intern and even the student apologized for the doctor's rudeness when the doctor left the room. As soon as I got home, I called the Cleveland Clinic and reported the jerk. And, I never darkened his doorstep again.

I want doctors who treat me with respect. After all, I am hiring them to take care of me. I won't go to someone who stresses me out or raises their voice to me because that makes me worse. They are supposed to help me...not upset me. Just my humble opinion.

So you might want to check around. I found my terrific rheumy by asking friends and my hair dresser. Hair dressers get all the scoop while they are cutting hair. LOL

Sherrine

Sherrine, there is only one other rheumy that I can possibly get an appointment with in February. But my GP wants all results wrapped up by the beginning of January because of the neurologist follow-up visit. It's complicated...I'm in Czech Republic and this whole system works around referrals from the GP. But I agree that doctors should treat patients with respect and make them feel better.

Hallahan, wow. The doc should have just laughed off the mistake and got over it. No reason to make you suffer for his mistake.

I feel like I'm on this vicious cycle of overdoing it for half a day, then sore and painful neck, elbows, and knees for 2 or 3 days. Feel better and right back at it. I've seen lots of advice on here about pacing. That's my new approach.

Whew, some of the docs! VA cardiology doc told me about fibromyalgia when I told him I had it, "That's the kind of information we throw in the trash." Jerks exact words. Three young interns were there, and they heard him, but were very interested in fibromyalgia. Yes, get a different doc.