Daughter in hospital, has hepititis C and Alcohol Hepititis and DT's

First I would thank you all for reading my post.

My daughter has had a problem with drugs or alcohol since early 20's and she is now 43 years old. We thought she wasn't drinking but when I went to visit her I noticed her eyes and face were yellow. She hasn't felt good in over 6 months especially in the mornings. Her feet and ankles are always swollen and puffy face and her feet were cracked and toes were peeling. We didn't smell any alcohol on her like we did years ago so was shocked when we found out. We thought her problems were from the Hepatitis C.

Took her to ER where they did blood work, scans and these other test. She has been in the hospital since Tuesday night. She was feeling better and then all hell broke out (excuse language) Thursday afternoon. She was having DT's and took 4 nurses to hold her down one time as she was trying to pull her tubes out and throwing anything she could reach. Did not know any of us and was talking to people that were not there. They finally gave her adivan (think that's spelled correct). That helped at first but now are giving her every hour to keep her calm. No visitors. We can go and peek in at her but they want her calm. She does talk now and eats a little (only a few bites). She is 5'4 and weighs 113.

Finally saw doctor and he told us she had alcohol hepatitis which I never heard of before. He can't do the liver biopsy test to know how much damage because her liver is so inflamed. He did say if she drank again she would die within a few months. I don't know if she has cirrhosis , he hasn't said. Does any of this sound familiar to anyone?

Thank you Ziff, I will check your page.

None of us know what to do at this time. She has lived with me many times in the past years and I can't do it anymore, the stress, crying and so on is awful. She has been in so many rehabs over the years but always goes back to drinking or drugs. I asked her why one time she does this to herself and she said she felt normal when she would drink. She has always been hyper since a little girl and drinking calms her down she says.

I live 3 hours from hospital but will ask my younger daughter when she goes to hospital to see if nurses will give her the numbers on Billrubin, createnine, Inr and lab work. I don't know what any of this is but saw on this site where someone mentioned getting these.

Thanks for replying,

Linda

Sorry your going through this and obviously you have done your part. May not feel that way and may never,but you truly have. I have a brother who witnessed what appeared to be my slow death and struggle to stay alive for years. He is a alcoholic and addict. I can identify to both ends of your situation. I hope he (my brother) wises up but it's not for me to decide. I will be there when he wants me to help show him the way. I can't do any more.

There is always gonna be a reason for us addicts to shirk reality. Trying to attach a particular reason for our addiction is often nothing more than a ploy. We like getting high and forgetting the pain normal life brings. We get a bill, Time to get a drink. My head hurts, Time to load up drugs. My.............. me.........!!!

Sure you heard it all but trying to figure out why is hopeless. Take care of you and do what you can for her. Never "Should" yourself. Again you can rest assured your doing what you can or else you wouldn't have been looking here. Hope my friend, There is always hope.


Ziff

Linda, I am another moderator on Hepatitis forum. I have been in your shoes for a long time. My partner, Mike, was so very sick for a long long time.

By the time is decided to quick drinking, he was cirrhotic, had had Hep C for 40 years, and was at death's door.

He wound up in the hospital as you describe, a total mess, and Septic to boot. I thought, they thought he'd be gone! But he was not. He was a very sick person, with a MELD of 26 given 3 months to live. Though many folks get help along the way and accept they have liver disease, he did not. He figured he was just dying and would die with a smile on his face.

NO SMILES in End Stage Liver Disease. He found that out quickly.

His trick was to figure out how to live 6 months, sober, and stay alive to qualify for transplantation. And then the final twist...he had liver cancer.

Turns out that is a good thing....if you can believe that. With sobriety, his MELD score improved, and so did his life expectancy, so once sober 6 months he would not be at the top of the list any more. With the tumor, he got "exception points," and zoomed back to the top of the list in Florida.

He was transplanted 6 months and 3 days after his first AA meeting. With a lot of will power, family support, and A HIGHER POWER FOR SURE. My man is a good man, who drank entirely too much for his body to live a long life.

You know it is funny. Cirrhosis is not guaranteed outcome of excessive drinking. Some are more prone to the disease than others. But Cirrhosis and Hep C is a bad combo.

If she gets through detox and goes on to a program that works, she has a good chance.

I agree with themiz..you need to be good and strong. The course of her journey may have some ups and downs.

BTW, my guy is good. Almost 5 years sober, 4 years post transpalnt, and 1 year fee of hepatitis. His cancer scans have been good too. Except for a bunch of skin ones...but this is Florida, everyone get skin cancer her with fair skin!

Hugs,

Mama Lama

Linda,

She will die if she does not quit drinking. And quickly. Did the nurses give you the labs so you can calculate her MELD score? Give us the numbers for Billi, INR and Creatinine and we can run the calculation for you. What are her AST/ALT? What is her AFP/ AlkPhos. The nurses will usually give you a copy of her labs if you ask nicely. They run them every day.

And don't be put out by the doc. They act like that sometimes. I think they feel so bad about folks who they can't help unless they want to help themselves. The docs get worn down with the sadness of that scenario and maybe grumpy over time. When Mike had that first appointment he looked like a dead man walking...skinny with legs so swollen, yellow, barely able to walk or stay away. He put his hand on Mike's knee and said in his Irish brogue...Michael, Lad, you'll be dead by Christmas you take another drink!" It was October 27th...that wasn't much time to "put his affairs in order." That hit home like a bomb... He wouldn't listen to me beg him, threaten him, cry. He had to decide for himself.
And , thank goodness, he DID.

I hope your daughter makes a good decision too...and that it is not too late.

Hugs,

Mama Lama

My youngest daughter called and said they released my daughter Kim and she decided to go to rehab but she doesn't want to, she still thinks she can do it on her own. The only reason she is going is because her roommate said if she didn't go she could not move back in.

I told her father and my youngest daughter to get the paper work on Kim for the labs and such so I hope they did. They are on their way now taking her to rehab place in Fort Lauderdale Fl, that's where she lives.

I'm worried that she will start on the pills again since she won't be drinking, she has done this many times before.....either pills or drinking and sometimes both. I know it's nothing I can do anymore. I use to think Mom to the rescue but I finally understand it didn't make any difference in helping her. It's her choice.

My daughter Carole said the doctor came in and told Kim she will not last a year if she drinks again and would be very sick. He also said it could take a few months for the yellow jaundice to go away.

She has very low self esteem because of her back. She has scoliosis and put two rods in her back when she was a teenager, she still had a slight hump on her upper back and grew her hair long to help cover it. She got a bad infection in her back so they took rods out so she walks with a cane and leans to the side. She has always been clean, neat , clothes and jewelry match and very attractive young woman but you wouldn't know that now.

She is very loving and thoughtful in so many ways but not regarding herself. Two days before she went to the ER she had flowers delivered to me because I drove there and brought her two fans.

The last time I let her live with me was two years ago when she was on pills. She gave me her meds to keep and give her. I had them in my room hidden with a special lock on my bedroom door (lock not as special as I thought). She was taking methadon (not sure of spelling) and Xanax. I would find her sleeping on the toilet, sleeping on floor beside the bed and even finding her face in her plate of food. I didn't put it together because she said she was just tired and I knew I had her meds. So one morning I decided to count her pills, put the number of them under my pillow, locked my bedroom door and put a little piece of paper up above the door. Told her I was going for a walk and be back in 15 minutes.

What a surprise for me. I saw the paper on the floor, door locked, so I went in and counted her pills and over half were gone since I counted them. I confronted her and she admitted she used a bobby pin to unlock my door and took them. Took me over a hour to try to find them in her room which some I couldn't find. Many other things happened, no need to mention because I think you get what I am saying.

Sorry this is so long, just so worried even though I know it doesn't help.

Thanks for all you info and caring,
Linda

Hi Linda,

As I read through your posts I wondered if you are doing anything for you? Al-anon comes to mind as does any supportive person or group who you can sound off on. Sounds like you have been on this road for a while and my guess is you have been steered in that direction - the whole family system gets so skewed in situations like yours.

My best wishes and hopes are with you. I used to work in the field and have seen a lot of people who didn't seem to have a prayer get clean and sober. I hope your daughter makes the choice to live.

Hi Linda,

Thanks for giving us an update on Kim. How are you doing? I think that Imbb brought up Al-Anon - have you ever thought of checking it out? I don't really know too much about them, but I know that my Mom checked out a couple of meetings. She didn't really talk about them except she mentioned that they "shed some light on a few things". Just a thought!

Eyes

There are groups for families of alcoholics and addicts, both online and in real life.


Here are a couple of links for you, Linda.



www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-alcoholics/

al-anon.org/?gclid=CI6Y_7K-vMYCFZGBfgodeoEFUQ

If Kim needs a transplant, she will not be considered for the list without 6 months "documented sobriety ". She would need to have signatures from AA meetings, or documented rehab. A lot of folks do not know about the "documented" part and fail to get the needed documentation.

This can be a rough journey for loved one's. Big Hugs

Linda, I will write more later, but wanted to get this out to you quickly from my phone. Mike kept a cheap calendar with big squares. The leader signed the days square each time he went with his/her name and the type if meeting: 12 step, guest speaker, etc. They want folks to go to the meetings scheduled during their danger time...the time they came hone to driving k or went to bars to hang out and drink too much. And if you we're a 7 day drinker...go to 7 meetings a week. Tho each group may be different.

They won't sign til the end cause the disengenuous get their card signed and take off after they get it back...which seems like coming late to mass and leaving after communion..cheating basically.

Good luck.

ML

Hello everyone,

Wanted to update you on my daughter Kim. She has been doing good and going to meetings twice a week and she is eating.

Last week while walking to the kitchen her legs gave out and she fell. Her right leg got stuck between the cabinet and fridge and her roommate didn't hear her yelling. She finally got her leg out but bruised and puffy. When I talked with her on Friday of that week she said she didn't feel good so was going to stay home.

Saturday morning she called a cab to take her to the hospital. I didn't know any of this until Sunday night because she didn't want to worry any of us until she knew what was wrong. I asked her why she went to the hospital and she said her stomach got swollen and she looked pregnant and it scared her.

The doctors did mri, blood test and I don't know what else if anything they did. She was on broth for a couple of days. Last night the doctor came in and told her she can leave today. He really didn't tell her any information about her condition except to say the fluid is ascites which is from liver disease. I hope when she checks out today the nurse or someone will have some orders for her. She said she is going to ask them a name of a liver/hepatitis doctor and i also reminded her to please go to records department and get a password or whatever she needs to look up her records online. If she forgets, I am going Thursday to see her and will print the forms out for her to sign and go to the hospital to get info.

Her stomach is still swollen but gone done some she said. Seems like they are fluffing her off but maybe there isn't anything they can do, just don't know. I was hoping her dad would be there when doctor came in but he wasn't. I couldn't go because of all the storms we have been having every day and she is 3 hours away. Makes me feel frustrated because I don't live closer during times like this.

I will do all I can to get those numbers this week.

Linda