Info on cirrhosis... anyone???

I am not entirely sure she is ready to go. Last night when I was getting her to bed she said to me that strange things are happening. She was telling me that my brother and my dad were in the room the night before. She says my dad has been in the bed with her; laying beside her. This is scaring her as she is once again "more with it" Because of this teetering back/forth she knows what has been happening that shouldn't be happening but can't understand it. It isn't giving her any comfort; she is actually quite scared. Our own doctors say that she is not "going by the books or norm" This makes things a little more difficult for us to understand. Today she is a lot more here with us but still having these hallucinations. She is just now aware that the things that she is seeing and witnessing are not real.

When someone outside our home comes in it makes the stress that much worse for us. This includes visitors and not just people that are here for her. There is no point to making things more difficult for us. We keep regular phone contact with our doctor and we see him on occasion too. He has told us that one of the bigger problems for my mom right now is that she realizes that her hallucinations are just that and she is finding them distressing. She'll weave "in and out" a lot so knows that these hallucinations aren't real.
She is still eating.. not quite the amount she used to but is eating and drinking. She has doctors orders to drink plenty of fluids and have been taking in what she needs to.
Her night screaming is because of nightmares. She screams all night for me to help her etc and has done this pretty well since the start. She is a very nervous and frightened person during the day too so I don't find it at all unusual. She has nightmares of falling etc. and yells for me to help her. We have talked about it. She also says sometimes my dad is there when she goes to bed and he 'squishes' her sometimes so she tries to tell him to go away. She has also told me that is scaring her as she knows my dad is already gone.

Hello Confussled,
I know how phsically and mentally exhausted you are feeling right now. I know what you mean about wanting to do something else for your Mom, but you are doing just what she wants. Just being there with her is the most important thing you can do for her now.
I was wondering if you have tried to give her a popsicle for moisture. Even when Dad couldn't eat, he could take a little bit if one.
Wish I could help you more,
Carol

Well she is still sleeping but today was so different from the rest. Today she got a bad case of diarrhea. She managed to dirty the bed all the way up to her neck within about an hours time period. She also threw up. We got her out of bed long enough to change and clean the bed but literally fell asleep again while we had her up. My hubby had to hold her up while I changed the bed and cleaned her. It is so strange. She has not eaten anything but drank some juice while she briefly woke. She is having short intervals in which she wakes up but only for minutes at a time.
She has some brutal bedsores and though I keep rolling her over she keeps managing to roll herself over again. I am hoping someone maybe have some suggestions.

Good news today, well good as news gets I suppose. We have been referred to a palliative program so as I can get a bit of relief through some of the end stages. My mom got so ill yesterday and through the night it was unreal. She has severe diarrhea and vomiting. Tie this in with being bedridden and you have yourself in a real mess. Still no food or drinks input either. =( I do not think she is going to miraculously bounce back from this one.

confussled, I am glad that you are getting some help. You must all feel overwhelmed right now. It sure doesn't sound like she is going to bounce back this time. Keep us posted and our thoughts are with you.

Confussled, I have been reading your posts and following your trial thruout your mothers illness, I am afraid that is what I will be facing with my husband so your posts have been a tremendous help preparing me. 1 thing I did want to mention, with her having such restless sleep, you might want to ask her dr about Ambien CR. When my husband was having some very rough nights not sleeping or sleeping very restlessly, nightmares or hallucinations whichever you prefer, the Ambien CR did the trick, He got a full nights deep sleep and woke up feeling totally different. When the body has long term sleep deprivation it will cause hallucinations even if there are not other things going on. Just a thought :)
I will keep you and your family in my prayers.
The only way I have found to relax, The most absolute way, and I think you just might get away with it,,,,,, If you have a laptop or portable DVD player ( if you dont go spend 80 bucks to get one, it will be worth its weight in destressing) rent a good comedy that you havnt seen yet, light some lavendar scented candles in the bathroom, run a hot bubble bath using lavender bath salts, oils or bubbly, give everyone instructions that while you are in the bathtub you are NOT to be disturbed under ANY circumstances, the world can stop for 1 1/2-2 hours so that you can relax, pop that movie in, turn off the overhead lights, turn the volume up loud or put on headphones and relax, get into the movie, dont let your mind wander, just concentrate on the movie. Maybe you can accomplish this when you have a nurse over so that will ease your mind because your not in there with your mom.
This will relax and destress me much better than a valium ever could. There are times when I have to do this nightly, but I always sleep better and the following day I am able to cope much better.

When my laptop was down, I could literally feel the tensions building, 2 weeks with no release and everyone around me knew about it. My grown daughter ( she works for me, poor girl) showed up at my house one night after work with her laptop and a movie she had rented and told me to go take a bath before I exploded. LOL When I argued that I didnt have time etc, she insisted. She went and got all of my candles and set them around the bathroom, ran the bath while i finished up the kitchen, setup her laptop on the stand and sent me to take a bath in no uncertain terms. 2 hours later I got out of the bath sooooooo relaxed I could have melted, she had gone home but before she left she cleaned the house for me and put on a pot of coffee and left me a note saying that she hoped I felt more relaxed and I could just bring the laptop to work with me the next day. This was right before I found out my husband was sick and moved him in with me, I was working 2 jobs and the stress of trying to get a business going to boot.
Sorry so long winded, I just honestly wanted you to understand how important it is to care for yourself also and offer the best way I knew how to recharge. I hope it helps:)
Therese

Cape Caz said...
My very dear friend is dying as we speak. He is on the donor list but it may not happen in time. He is a severe alcholic and I am not sure is he will get a new liver as a result. Do they take that into consideration when a liver becomes available?

I am unable to help you there. I live in Canada and you are not eligible in Canada for a transplant when the liver failure is caused by alcohol or drug abuse.
My mom is also dying as we speak. She is now asleep and I can no longer wake her.

Hello Cape Caz, and welcome to HealingWell.
If you are in the USA it is possible to have a liver transplant even if it was caused by alcohol or drugs. They usually make the patient go to AA or NA for a period of time before they are listed though. My husband was required to go once a week for at least 3 months.
Have a good evening..........

my mom died peacefully tonight with the family beside her. the battle is all over.

Confussled, I am sorry for the loss of your mother, she is finally at peace.

Thank you everyone for your kind words and support. The last week has been absolutely horrid on us. The bed didn't get picked up for 5 days; the paperwork didn't get sent in for "proof of death" so we couldn't get her cremated. It has been exhausting. Now also everyone knows what my mom was sick of because her being sick was a secret from her friends and so they found out by way of finding out about her passing.
We are onto a whole new chapter of our lives. I am just trying to cope with the notion that I am in my 30s and both my parents are gone. It was a very sad and difficult process. It was very tiring taking care of her. I know she is in a better place and much happier now. A piece of my mother died three year ago when my father passed away and our dog passed away. She is with both of them now and they'll all be waiting together for the day that I join them... and that is a long whiles away.
Confussled.