is he out of the woods?

my son was unconscious in July, in the hospital for a month, very weak , had paracentesis twice and looked like he wasn;t gonna make it.  In the last month, he no longer has ascetis, is getting stronger by the day, still has muscle wasting, but not as bad, seems to be coming out of it.  He still drinks his beer every day.  Can;t figure out how he can come out of it this way after being almost dead. 

My question is (and I know no one has a crystal ball) is he going to get better and better or is this just a lull in his well being.  It is difficult for me to understand how he can come back so good as he has cirrhosis, hep c, heart failure, etc.  Am I getting my hopes up too high or do some people come back to almost normal?  Or is this a yo-yo disease that will drive the caregiver nuts.  Any comment would be appreciated.  Don;t want to get my hopes up to high and then fall down like a rock.

                                          Chris

Thank you Teresa for your replay.  It just boggles my mind that one can get so sick as to nearly die and then be almost normal.  The doctor told my DIL that he was a very sick man but now that he feels so good I just got my hopes up.  Too high, Maybe.  I have read many web sites on this and they all say that cirrhosis does not get better. 

I appreciate your answer and wish you the best.  Thank you so much.

                                 Chris

to all,   I haven't posted for a while as the last time my son had paracentesis it hasn;t come back so now he feels like it never will and is doing what he wants to including drinking his 12 beers a day.  I do not badger him anymore about his drinking as I might as well talk to the wall, and neither does my DIL (God bless her) as she too can see it does no good.

There is a 10 yr old daughter involved in this too and she too can;t see why her daddy won;t stop drinking. 

I suppose now it is just a waiting game until he becomes ill again.  I read other threads where people do everything in their power to keep the illness at bay and my son just does not give a darn. 

He looks awful with the orangish gray palor but says he feels great.  Just wanted my 2 cents worth in the forum that sometimes you just cannot do a thing, just watch and pray.  I guess the alcoholism is going to win out in the end.  Thanks for letting me share my troubles when yours are so much greater.

                                                 Chris

Hello Chris,
I have been worried about you! You have really hit home with me, when you were talking about your grandaughter. We have a nine year old son, and he has been going through a hard time also. It just isn't fair to the children. I have been very honest with our son, he knows his dad needs a transplant or he will not live long. I have taken him to the doctors, and involved him in the process. He was having anxiety attacks and ignoring his father, he told his father to not come in his room. He started klinging to me more and more. Since I have involved him, he is opening up more, and making positive comments to my husband. Being honset with children is important, the truth does hurt, but they can learn how to cope if they know what they are coping with. Valeries suggestion about a counselor is a good idea. School counselors can also be helpful. I am not sure but it seems like they have ala-non for children, it would be worth checking into. She needs to understand that his drinking is also an illness and how she can best cope with it. Please believe me when I say your problems are really no less than mine. Please take care of yourself, DIL, and that precious baby!!!!! I do care. My Prayers are with you and your family!!!

HUGS

Teresa

Hi Chris,

The sleeping for most of the time is an indication of encephalopathy which is common with liver disease. The cold is very taxing on his liver and may be the straw that breaks the camels back until it goes away.

I imagine it's hard for him to drink as much when he is sleeping all the time. I wish I could tell you something that would get him to cut back on drinking or give it up. Alcohol is very, very toxic on the liver when you have cirrhosis or are suseptable to liver disease.

Keep in touch with us. We like hearing from you when things are okay as well as when you have problems. The emotional support is very helpful for most of us. We may not be able to alter your son's destructive lifestyle, but we can help make life more bearable for you. And you can also help keep us going.

Warm hugs,

Barb

"It is just that he seemed to be making strides toward being better. "

Chris, forgive my bluntness, but he didn't seem to be doing anything towards getting better. I think he was just status quo for a while. His immune system is not working well because of the liver condition and his continued drinking, so he picked up a cold which has him feeling much worse than if he were in good health.

I've received no treatment for my hep C or liver cancer (waiting still for cancer treatment), and haven't had alcohol in nearly 20 years--but caught a doozy of a cold that went into bronchitis and I can't seem to shake it, despite antibiotics. One day I'll feel fine, the next I'll be coughing and miserable. Prior to the cold, I went through a spell of sleeping 18-20 hours a day for a week or more. It had to be encephalopathy, though it hasn't happened since then. I do, however, sleep more than a normal, healthy person.

Your son can't drink when he's sleeping, so that's a good thing. I think it's a great idea to get away with your DIL and g'daughter. Be aware that your son may have a "celebration" while you are gone, if he is sleeping less, and drink even more than previously--but that is not your responsibility and all your lives should not stop for him. Just the opposite. I'm also pleased to hear that your g'daughter will get therapy. I think it will be helpful.

It's so good to hear from you. Please don't be a stranger! Come back and let us know how things are going with you.

Connie

Hello Chris,

Mark was sleeping around 20 hours also, he was very unstable at the time. The sleeping and forgetfulness is encephalopathy.  With liver disease just a "cold" can take a month or longer to get over. I will keep on praying for him!!

I hope you and your DIL and grandaughter have a wonderful time, on Spring Break. It will be good for you!! I am glad that DIL is seeking counseling for the baby. It will be helpful to her. My son is doing well, he has counseling scheduled at school a few times a week. I try to keep it simple and honest with him. I do take him to some of the Dr. appointments, so he has a part in the process. It has cut down on the anxiety attacks.

HUGS & PRAYERS

Teresa

Post Edited (TDT) : 3/7/2006 7:36:23 AM (GMT-7)