New appreciation for you moms and working gals

I've always had the luxury of stopping when I felt the need to rest because I don't have an outside job and my kids are all grown. So I've been able to stay out of the sun, stay home when I felt like it (which has been most of the time) turn down invitations when I didn't feel like going somewhere, and having my hubby bring food home if I didn't feel like cooking. I believe in taking care of myself when I'm sick and I think this is why I've finally started feeling much better.

Lately my days have been turned upside down because we finally found a new home, closed a week ago, started remodeling it the following day, and immediately started hiring contractors to do some work to our current home so we could put it on the market. So my days are no longer my own. I'm going a hundred miles an hour every day, my phone never stops ringing, I'm outside more than I should be, and I'm exhausted. And when I say we, I mean I. My DH spends his time at his work and I've taken charge of the house thing. Plus the houses are in different towns and I'm running back and forth between them. Then I run to the yarn store to find some peace and quiet with my friends in the late afternoon. Yesterday I felt so weak that I couldn't stand and look at a wall of yarn and had to sit down. It's as though my legs won't support me anymore. My joints are all on fire, and I'm so weak and tired that I just want to sleep for a week. I know the day will come that I can stop and rest again, (and I won't have any more stairs!!!!!) and we'll probably move in about six weeks, but boy oh boy. How do you guys do it. No wonder some of you never get well.

Intellectually I've wondered how you get up and go to work when you're tired, or how you take care of a family and cook meals for a family, do laundry, clean your houses, all while you feel so bad. Now I know what it's like for so many of you. This just sucks. And it's putting me into a flare. And on top of everything else, I have a husband and daughter to understand and support me, and help me, and I know so many of you don't.

There's always a silver lining, I suppose, and in my case it's that I've been losing weight. It's so darn hot and humid here, as Carol can attest, and the heat plus my fatigue has taken away my appetite. And the running around on top of that, has helped me lose a few pounds. And that feels wonderful.

So to all of you friends out there, my hat's off to you. I hope everyone has as good a weekend as possible and that you get some refreshing rest! I love you guys.

Hugs,

Pat

(((((Pat))))) I can't imagine how exhausted you must be with the move and all that goes into that and trying to get your house ready to sell. I think that's one reason I keep putting off trying to get our house ready to sell - it exhausts me just to think about it. Thanks for your post - yes, it can be hard to keep going as a mom when lupus has sucked all of your energy and filled your joints with pain and all you want to do is crawl into bed. I've had a pretty good summer up until now. I was able to do a lot with my kids and I was doing okay, but I think it has all caught up to me now and I am suffering. Unfortunately I can't stop right now. My daughter is doing a bunch of community dance performances this week and next week, and my husband is having to put extra hours in at work this week and next week, so I am on my own. I have to say that my kids have been great about helping this summer and my son has even helped with some of the meals. You are right that it is so hard to catch up on rest and feel better when you have no choice but to keep going despite feeling rotten. I think that's where I'm at right now. I hope things settle down for you soon and I hope you have lots of help unpacking. I imagine it will be nice once you have gotten all moved. Keep us posted on how things are going. Lots of hugs

Hi Pat!

 

Wow, you have a lot going on right now don't you.  I hope all of your house plans work out really well for you and your hubby!

 

Yeah, it's not easy. When you have to work to pay the bills and keep food on the table, you just get up and do it.  No other choice really.  I work on average about a 50 hour week during my busy wedding season.  So that's about half the year.  The other 6 months, I can slack off a bit and get some rest.  I also have the grocery shopping, house cleaning, doctor's appointments, etc, etc, to take care of.  I dont' have kids.  Thank goodness!!  I'd be dead if I did.  LOL.  I don't get the extra help around the house that I really need. My husband is wonderful, but not good at just "doing it".  He's better now that we have a house with a big yard.  It's his job to cut the grass.  There was no negotiating on that one, LOL!

 

I was doing fine with this amount of demand on me until this year.  Now I'm having to scale my photography business way back for next year.  Instead of shooting 25 weddings, I'm only doing 6, and then taking on a part time photography job as a realestate photographer.  Big, dramatic change.  My lupus has decided to come out of hiding.  I've had 3 flares since the end of April.  So things aren't very good right now. 

 

I think it's the same with everyone.  We just don't have a choice.  Like SJ said, there is no back up plan and if we don't do it, it doesn't get done, or the bills don't get paid.  We have to get up, go to work, and put stress into our lives. That's the way it goes!

 

Take it easy okay!  Don't let your lupus take control!

Ginny

Jennifer, I'll be thinking of you as I clean out closets and fill boxes. I hope your children don't remove things out of the boxes as you put them in! Pace yourself as best you can. Easy to say but hard to do isn't it.

At least you won't have to be in such a rush to unpack. The time crunch is what is killing me and it sounds like you're feeling the same pressure. This too will pass.