I think your first Dr was not very experienced, I would go so far as to say he was just plain stupid. Nobody calls and tells you that you have a disease without at least scheduling an appointment and developing a treatment plan.
As Mrs Brady said, Lupus is diagnosed by having at least 4 of 11 symptoms, and an ANA is just 1 of the symptoms. ANA can indicate a number of diseases, but each of them requires a number of other symptoms,
nothing is diagnosed by ANA alone.
Check out our Lupus 101 thread, or look at
www.lupus.org. I think you will find you are not experiencing Lupus symptoms -- hair loss doesn't even make the list. The OB/GYN should have sent you to an endocrinologist - they are the experts in thyroid disorders, not a rheumy.
Let us know if you have more questions!