Just need a ear, This is really tuff diease

Hello dear friends,

 Its been a long year. At this point I have no clue what day it is where I am at who and what I have done. This is freaking me out. Lymes is so new to me! I tested positive Babesiosis after living for over 20 years treating multiple sclerosis. It was a great shock and For a moment I thought Hey this is great no more posin shots to prevent ms from progressing. Im trying to understand lymes and its not been easy, Im doing all the vitamins and antibiotics I was freaked when my lymes doctor said and mailed me prescriptions for hormones, its just all so much. Im well no bullcrap afraid of meds as they always give me the worst side effects.  I use to have high blood pressure after starting treatment for lymes my eyes blurred and blood pressure went to low..Then I came out .25 for vitamin d? Its just so overwhelming… I was to afraid to start his hormone regimine, I feel so ashamed. I know you must be like what is she crying about she found out she dosent have ms?

Im so blown away why wont my nero help me or even admit yes this is possible? Will this lymes ever go away, I don’t think after 20 years it will? How is this fair to people they show the darn animal commercial protect your pets from lymes,,, but hey there is no way humans can suffer long term from this. Why is this even a issue?

 I feel lost and sad and confused, I cry for no reason and feel so defeated. I don’t believe in depression..i hate pity party people but Im sitting here in full on tears and just want to go home to the lord im done let me off this darn ride it sucks! I have a feeling this may be hormones and I need doctors help….But where the hell is the doctors??? My app. Is next month and I will have to drive 9 hrs, im sure you all  ready know its so hard to drive with vertigo. This will be my 3 visit and im taking someone this visit as I seem to space out when im there. Its all so much.

How is this possible, really I get doctors make mistakes that’s fine I do to, but to find the truth and ignore it well that is like watching someone die, or at least it feels like it….My mind isn’t right so please forgive me if I don’t make sense…I just want to figure this out hit the escape button anything. I cant give up as god gave me this truth and answer in my western blot test after 20 years…im so tierd…..i know you guys are to. Im just so angry at all this…. Not just for myself but for all of us…I wont be rid of lymes after 20 years, I wonder what the 15 years of shots and steroids have done to me, I have no tail yet?

Thanks for the ear friend….

This hurts, Im afraid, there is little relief, the fear is great, how the hell is this lymes kicking my ass and I was never afraid of my M.S. Im lost and need a hand. Why wont anyone help? I don’t want the pills, I cant trust them or the people. They all lie. The one man I found is far away and trying to help hundreds of people like us…..God please send some help for all of us….this is awful…..

Please pray for me friends as I will for you

Kimmiepop,

I'm so sorry for everything you are going through.

When I first started out, my neurologist at the time insisted that because my Elisa test came back negative, I did not have Lyme. The problem with a lot of doctors is what they offer is advice and not the absolute truth. However when you are in their office they make you feel like everything they are saying is FACT. Most neuros don't see a lot of cases of lyme...they do see their fair share of MS. It's like the old saying.... if you're a hammer everything looks like a nail. I don't think doctors realize what their ignorance is doing to people in chronic pain.

My friend's mom lived with MS for 18 years...she tested positive for lyme twice in that time but her docs still insisted it was MS. She finally took control as you are doing and has seen improvement in the few months she's been receiving treatment.

There are a lot of questions with this disease and the best thing I can recommend is to join a support group. This forum is wonderful and the people extremely helpful. I'm not sure where you are in Arizona, but you might try:

http://www.lymenet.org/SupportGroups/UnitedStates/Arkansas/FairfieldBay.shtml

Do you have a lyme support group in your area?

Kimmie,

I am so sory you are feeling so terrible. I can tell you that I am a VERY strong minded person and can take pain but this disease has brought me to my knees. I used to cry all the time too. The pain was unbearable and I felt like I didn't want to wake up anymore. The best thing that happened to me was this group of people. It helps to talk to others that understand. It also helps me to stay busy even if I'm just on the computer all day. It keeps my mind off of everything. Sometimes, I play games online to just get my mind off of it.

I also want to say that we are here for you! We have been where you are many, many times. Don't give up! It gets better. I spent an entired year suffering and I am finally feeling a little better. I'm not 100%, but I've been able to function. Keep coming back here and vent all of your frustrations. It helps, trust me.

I too have been having this for over 20 years and it can get better. I just want you to know that.

Have you been checked for Bartonella and all the other co-infections?

Hi Kimmie,

Tested positive for lyme must have been a huge shock for you after believing you had MS all these years.   You can get better!  I had lyme for  over 10 years before getting better and a friend of mine was misdiagnosed of having Fibro for over 30 years and she is totally better from chronic lyme (we both used alternative medicine).

The steroids doesn't help but please don't get discouraged!  If you start taking detox baths every day you will get those steroids out of your body as well as foot detox baths, etc.   You can learn about detoxing in the sticky thread on top of this forum called "New to Lyme ~ Start Here!"

Please read as much as you can as knowledge is power.  There are wonderful books out there.

Any questions, please ask.  We are here for you!

Hugs,

Denise