Can it be all in my mind?

So, I felt very bad during the multiple abx treatment. I am very curious if healthy people that are given the same abx in the same dosage wouldn't react just the same as us, the unhealthy ones.
The reason why I ask this is because I have felt no improvement after finishing the 10 weeks abx treatment. I read somewhere that a lot of people are infected with borrelia but in their case this bacteria is still 'sleeping' and at some point in life it will activate and trigger the chaos. Can herx occur in those who have sleeping borrelia? Is it possible?
I have this thought that maybe I am infected with borrelia (as the dark field microscopy showed) but it is still asleep and my vision problems, brain fog and dizziness come from another disease (like something psychological).
Before finding out about having Lyme, one of my doctors gave me Xanax and I can say that for a while (like 2 weeks) things have been a lot better. Was it possible that this drug would trick my body or something and that I would forget about feeling sick? Or I really have a psychological disease?

But how can you know if you have symptoms from lyme or from insanity?

What if I keep on putting myself through hell with these antibiotics and after another 10 weeks of treatment there is still no improvement? I am very scared that I will end up in a mental facility and no treatment will get me better.

Other people in my family have taken antibiotics for other things (strep, bladder infections). Not ONCE have they felt WORSE. And my Dad did a precautionary dose of antibiotics for something recently, and noticed nothing. Honestly, although I had been told I might feel worse when I started treatment, I NEVER would have imagined a response as strong as I had...

Honestly, 10 weeks of antibiotics isn't that long for chronic Lyme (I did 2 years and it wasn't enough). If you still have symptoms, I think you still have an infection. If you are plauteuing, you should look at other treatment options (switching antibiotics, adding antibiotics, natural etc.) and detoxing like Traveler says.

What sort of antibiotics and at what dosages have you had? Are you seeing an LLMD? It's also possible that you aren't on a high enough dosage, or the right antibiotics, to really get you to 100%

I am afraid to keep on taking Xanax because in time I heard that your body gets used to it and you will need to increase the dosage to obtain the same effect. I try to keep xanax for my worse days, like a backup treatment, not to take it every day. The money is indeed becoming an issue as in my country the insurance companies do not recognize lyme as a treatable condition. So, I have to buy all the antibiotics and herbal medication I use. After reading about detox here I wanted to get started with the detox baths but I couldn't find epsom salts in the drugstores. They only have relaxing bath salts :( Someone here told me about Questran...again no drug store had it. I want to try infrared sauna, at least this we have in my country, but the money issue pops up again. because I have vision problems I am afrain I will not be able to work any more...and this is another stressful event for me...money...
My antibiotic treatment looked like this : 4 weeks Clindamycin, Sulfamethoxazole (Biseptol?)and Tinidazole followed by 6 weeks of Minocycline, Ciprofloxacin and Tinidazole. Now I have 2 weeks to take Cat's claw, Goldenseal Root and Parafree. I feel better than during the abx treatment but still not that good as I felt before taking any meds.

I have to tell you that despite doctors telling me I was going through menopause or "just" suffering from anxiety/depression, I knew that it was not normal to all of a sudden feel like the world was caving in around me. In the beginning my symptoms were mostly psychological. I could not exist without xanax and it really did help me get through the worst. I was a basket case everyday. I kept looking to find a doctor who would listen to me that something was not right with my body and I was right. As I got better and better, I realized I was needing the xanax less and less and before I knew it I was off altogether. Everything seems back to normal now. My train of thought is clear and calm and the anger and shakiness is gone. Lyme really really messes with your mind. Don't tell yourself its all in your head because its not.

Sorry, I meant to say that she did not herx in that last post. Her abx were much like the ones used for lyme and she had to do it off and on over the course of a few months.

I was actually wondering the same thing about the herbs I'm taking. Would someone who is not sick, herx from them? I'm taking ABAB.

I would love for him to get tested, but it is expensive and I doubt he would do it. He would also never take antibiotics just for the heck of it. If the herbs I'm taking weren't so expensive, I'd have him try it. I just posted in another discussion that he was bitten by a tick over 10 years ago and had 3 days of fever and intense illness. He has had nothing since. He thinks he had Rocky Mtn Spotted Fever, but who knows? He is healthy as a horse and always upbeat and happy. He gave blood a few years back and the gals taking his blood said that he had some anti-viral factor in his blood. They called it superblood. I wish I could remember what it was that they said. It's some sort of Type O

In addition I have two children who I am now vigilantly watching. My daughter already shows signs of anxiety and my son complains of stomach pains alot, but I am not in a place to get them tested. I don't want to scare them or put them through the stress unnecessarily. I need to understand my own condition better. I'm still at the beginning of this whole thing.

If you're worried about the xanax, you could maybe try ativan (lorazepam). It's very similar, but faster-acting and in my experience it doesn't hit you quite as hard. I've been on a low dose of it for a while now - sometimes I have to take it everyday, sometimes I'll go weeks without it - I haven't felt much of an addiction to it or anything like that.

As far as the questran, I'm pretty sure you need a prescription for that. My doctor has me get mine through clark's pharmacy (just called cholestyramine - the generic name) which is a bit expensive but it's supposed to be the purest (and presumably most effective) form.