Update: April 26, 2014
Around 2008 my knees started to ache. I was 27. I thought it was the 2 jobs the 2 kids and life really. Untill it persisted and then gravitated to my neck. I went to my dr with the sympoms and she tested me for lyme. I was positive, but not knowing much about
it. I agreed with the dr, that it was an infection that was going to always be in my blood, but I would recover "completely". Looking back does that even make SENSE?!. I took my 21 days of doxy and felt, ok. Some time went by and sure enough I felt the joint pain again. I thought hhmm, I was bit again. GRRR! I took the doxy once again, and that's it.
I live in the North East where lyme is bad, and I certainly knew (or thought, i knew) about
it! SURE..
In 2012 I quit my job to take care of my sick round the clock, mother in law. Months after she moved in I started to have night sweats. I called my mother! I thought pre-menopause?! Stress?! I told my doctor, she tested me for hormones, I was fine. I demanded another lyme test (why not, I thought) still positive. I plugged away at my family, never giving lyme disease a second thought.
I grew more tired. Less interested in life, my family. Was I really that depressed!? Why!? The aches persisted. I got used to it.. TMJ, a possible fibromyalgia dx. Makes sense?! I've got a lot going on. HA!
Fast forward to this past year. My mother in law is now gone. My kids are a bit older, my husband is working more, and I have no job. YAY. Stay at home mommy! Time for a break to build my own business, and finally get around to all the things in life I've always wanted to do, I say HA again because...
It was long days of sitting on the couch mindlessly watching bogus daytime t.v. Not being able to concentrate on any of the daily household tasks. No drive to achieve my dreams of business owner, or "super" mom, with tons of time, no, there I was a shell of my former self on my couch all day. Paralyzed of sorts. My rage thrown around to whichever family member "pissed me off" that day. HA!
Soon, more persistent achiness, muscle aches, and twitches. My nerves got worse. My husband grew more concerned, as I seemed so disconnected, achy, forgetful. The house a mess, when he came home, kids still needing help with homework, as I just couldn't. My skin broken out and discolored.(I was put on minocycline) Then the scariest,,. Hair falling out.
I thought what now. Cancer!? I went to all kinds of specialists, I have tmj, need jaw surgery, check. I am sensitive to light, glasses, check. A mole, biopsy, check. Breast cancer in family history, hell check that too. I mean I am 33 after all!
All came back "healthy", or did it? The 7 viles of blood they took showed. Low white blood cells, low monocytes and Positive 39, 41, and 23 band LYME. I am "perfectly healthy" my dr said. Lets do an mri, (which came back fine) maybe you have lupus, m.s., and if nothing else lets talk about
fibromyalgia again. HA, I've heard this before, along with "Are you seeing a therapist?"
I started to see a chiropractor, I told her about
my jaw, and slight scoliosis. ALL went well. Untill... My sympomts of LYME got worse and worse. The tight fingers, eye twitching, lump feeling in throat, painful muscle spasms. I thought that's it I neeed to do something! If for no one else, my kids and my husband!
I talked to my chiro about
all these weird symptoms, she said "I wish I could help more". I thought "me too". I looked up LLMD's all over the country, prepping my husband for thousand dollar treatments, Surely I will be the demise of this family I thought!?
While I waited to decide what to do, travel off my tiny little Island, where I live, costing hundreds at a time, to go to the mainland for costly treatments? My chiro called me and said "I know of a woman, she is an ll herbalist here on the Island" WHAT!?
I researched herbalists and lyme over and over, and this very site popped up time and time again. I reached out. I felt welcome. I thought "There are others, and this could work".
It's only been a few short weeks and I haven't even begun my journey yet, but I feel I am in good hands, and making great progress, on the good days, that is. I hurt worse than ever on the bad days. So much radiating pain like I've never felt. But... on these good days, man, it's like a dream, a good dream, like I'm walking on clouds. "So this is the way a "healty 33yr old should feel!" So, I just keep looking towards that! HA!
I won't lie... The bad days are so dark! I cry, I ache, I just want to crawl under a rock! But I know I have support now! And in the end I know this is NOT a death sentence!
In the end I see that the stress of my wonderful mother in law, and quitting my job, and going off and on abx for acne, and possibly even the chiropractor itself, probably just led me on a downward spiral fast. Without me knowing the real truth of what was going on in my body.
I never thought in a million years I would ever be on a forum telling my story, but here I am. I never thought I would give herbs a shot for what "ails" me, but here I go. and Who knows I might change my mind tomorrow, but either way....
I am lucky to have found the few people I have here, and my community, and when I do feel like crawling under a rock, I think of the other people out there, that need to hear the stories of people like me. I know there will be light at the end of this dark tunnel. I know I can call my herbalist at anytime. I feel so much comfort in that alone. It's indescribable.
Whichever path that you decide for yourself. Just take comfort in knowing that you are making the right choices for you, and you are NOT alone!!!
With Love,
Larissa
NOTE: AS I SIT HERE AND WRITE, I FEEL A 'BITE' ON MY ARM, WOULDN'T YOU KNOW IT.. A DEER TICK! GRRR!!
I will be on the phone 1st thing again. Is this for real I ask myself!? (almost in defeat) I want to move from this place of LYME! But I know there is no 'SAFE PLACE". Just pro action! I use bug spray and powders daily. Showers and tick checks year round!! I am currently getting the rest of my family tested as well. FINGERS CROSSED AND PRAYERS DAILY!!!
