Please Help So Lost

hoping some Veterans will shed some hope.

My name is Nick I am 21 years old, 7 months ago i started off with sciatica like hip pain and swollen lump node in my groin, within two months after ignoring that I began to be unusually tired and having mild anxiety. constipation, decreased appetite, libido, vertigo, off balance tippy feeling.

Also ignored that and within 2 weeks off the onset of those symptoms I began to have extreme insomnia/anxiety, memory loss, depression, brain fog, disconnected to the world. racing heart

Went to my GP and tested low for testosterone and positive band 41. starting treating for the testosterone with no relief.
began to take this really seriously because by then I have lost 2 months of my life all symptoms so intense could not leave the house.

Hospital stay with hope to find answers discovers heart problem known as POTS, explains why I can barley walk. Finally began to take my life in my own hands and researched and researched and found a LLMD after 6 months from initial onset. BY now i feel brain dead/ all symptoms still present other then off balance and vertigo, now noise sensitivity added.

took doxy, omnicef,zithro, and rifampin. only lasted two weeks on rifampin due to servere stomach issues.

Igenex results intermediate... DR suspects bart and babs

I am in very little pain other then random chest pains that are intense but only last 2 days and weird feelings in legs.

Sucicide is on my mind 24/7 my mental symptoms are by far the worst I have no life right now what so ever I feel like this is the end. I have never been sick my entire life There seems no way out,

Lymetime - there is treatment for you. I know it doesn't feel like you will get better...but you will...with treatment, and time.

I also had muscle twitching...and I still have internal tremors.

There are other treatments for bartonella besides rifampin.

You could continue to treat with abx for lyme, and add an herbal protocol for the bartonella.

Please keep posting your concerns/questions on this forum, and read what other people have done...and how we cope.

Lymetime223 welcome to the forum. I'm sorry you are feeling so awful. I too have had many of the same symptoms. I think the POTS and anxiety have been the worst to deal with. Not only does the lyme and co's bring on crazy negative thoughts, the situation we're in is depressing. My only advice is to enjoy the good days (or moments)
continue with your antibiotics and/or herbs, reach out and stay connected. This forum has been a lifesaver for me this last year! You are young and strong, you will heal!

Hi Lymetime 223 - I am really sorry you are going through this. Many of us have lost a great deal. Sorry about your girlfriend too. It makes it more difficult when people don't stand by us.

Are you detoxing? It is crucial to remove the toxins to help you feel better.

Hang in there. You will find your way back to health but it takes time and patience. You have youth on your side though so that's a good thing.

Bartonella is notorious for producing neurological and psychological symptoms:

http://www.onehealthinitiative.com/publications/Breitschwerdt%20J%20Neuroparasitol%20Review%202012.pdf

My daughter and I both experienced the symptoms you list, including the psychological ones (anxiety/panic attacks, suicidal ideation, decreased cognitive/executive function). She was worse though, and was originally diagnosed with Asperger's (high functioning autism), Tourette's, ADHD and motor delay.

It took a lot of researching, and trial and error on our parts, but we are now asymptomatic, although continuing on low doses of the herbal protocols that got us to this place of happiness/wellbeing. If we need to continue them indefinitely we can do that. Stephen Buhner has changed our lives.

For us, dizziness and executive function problems were associated with babesia (or babesia-like-protozoan) infection while cognitive function and pain were associated with bartonella.

You will get better if you set your mind to it, don't take "no" for an answer, and start thinking outside the box of mainstream medicine.

Hi Lymetime,
Welcome to our community!
I'm so very sorry that you are in such a bad place. I too am in a dark place right now and struggle with it daily right now - but I've been through this before and know that I will get through this again and that this is part of the disease, and not who I really am.

Have you read through our "New to Lyme? Start here!" thread that sits at the top of the forum? It's packed full of important information, symptom lists, detoxing suggestions, helpful articles and more. Please be sure that you read through this wonderful resource!

As Summersun asked, are you detoxing? As these bacteria die, they leave behind toxins that can completely overwhelm the body and it's functions, cause an increase in pain and more. By doing things to help your body to detox, you can usually reduce the severity and sometimes the number of symptoms that you must live with. Most of us have to detox daily and use more than one or two things to help our body's to detox. Just ask and we will be more than happy to make suggestions!

So you said you found a LLMD - are they ILADS trained or a self claimed LLMD?

How long have you been in treatment and what is your treatment? We will be better able to offer things that will help if you could answer these few questions.

Wonderful! Now I understand what you mean - thank you for clarifying it - I always worry about who people are getting treatment from!

I'm not sure what you mean by 'altered' - Lyme and Bartonella can each cause an 'altered' stated to happen and I've experienced both diseases and several periods of altered mental status - from uncontrollable rage and paranoia to severe cognitive impairment (couldn't follow oral or written instructions or patters - like assembling shish-ka-bobs even though my daughter was beside me assembling them as well).

You can email me if you would like to talk about this in more detail but are not comfortable discussing this on the forum - or we can continue talking here!

You should be able to send me an email by clicking on the small blue envelope under my screen name or by clicking on my screen name. If that doesn't work for some reason, you can hover your cursor over the blue envelope and my email address should appear in the lower left hand corner of your computer screen.

I have to run to town to start proceedings on a company that has chosen to not deliver or return some goods, but I'll be back shortly (I hope!!) and will respond no later than tomorrow.