I'm terrified of treatment :(

I'll be praying for all of you.

I appreciate all of the encouragement and kind words. There are really no words to describe the gratitude I have for the people on this forum. You guys keep me going.

I'd like to believe I'm in the worst part of this journey back to health. Maybe that's naive. I've thought this many times in the past and then Lyme roars and I'm proved wrong.

Hope is a funny thing. Hope is challenging too.

rajaenchen said...
Hi IHL,

I read your thread yesterday and I wanted to get back to you, but I have been so sick this week I ran out of steam! I have been feeling exactly like what you describe for weeks, moths and even a few years. I was diagnosed with lyme in late 2013 after a camping trip and quite a few "bug bites" including fleas from the raccoons that kept getting into our gear. The deer were all over our site also. It was a very wooded section of the Sierra Nevada mountains in California.

I ignored the diagnosis (tested thru Igenix and positive, not CDC positive) since I was holding on to that ray of hope they were wrong. I was bitten in my early twenties in CA, never tested, but had all the symtoms, including a very last rash on my stomach (too big, they told me). and Iv'e been sick with one thing or another ever since. At that time they said I had Fibro.

LOng story short..... I ve been assured it's lyme (maybe other things) and I have been terrified of treatment ever since! I have a very weakened immune system. My natural docs are very affraid of me getting much worse with the aggressive way the LLMD in San Fransisco wants to start treatment. He does not believe any natural cures will help at all since he says I have late diseminated neurological lyme.

I live in such a rural area that does not recognize nor treat lyme, I'm affraid of complications. I got very sick from an herbal tincture that my natural path tried on me. I also only have tylenol to take for pain and my liver is getting increasingly more painful...

Longer story short...not... I'm affraid I will start treatment, end up in a small town hospital and never come out again! I have often thought I have PTSD from this monster inside me.

I also know I will not get better without, strong, aggressive, IV treatment for my neurologic lyme.

I used to call my chronic denial of this "my expedition down the "de" Nile river" (in Egypt.) Now I just call it "the boat sank, lost my oars, and I'm treading water as long as I can"

Hang in there sweetie! I go back to the LLMD in August and the doc will be asking what did I do with the last three months. (Not taking your meds...) but that will have to change soon.

I'll pray for you. Please, if you would, pray for me. I am really beyond scared, Im glad there is someone else out there that feels that way too...at least enough to share it!

Hugs!

You need to know that natural treatments work even for long held severe Neuro Lyme cases. I'm one of them that is now healed. I'm an abx failure and have still managed to heal a 40+ yr old Lyme, Bart, Babesia, RMSF and more by using herbs only.

Don't let those that are not educated enough lead you down a path you don't wish to go. If you wish to use herbs/natural treatments to treat these infections, they work quite well. At the very least you could use herbs along with your abx to help ease some of the issues and make healing a little easier on yourself.

rajaenchen, would you mind if I emailed you to get the name of the healer in Seattle? I'm always looking for good referrals in the NW.

IHL, my doctor is battling cancer. We're hoping he will pull through it again.

Usedtogarden (I hope that name will change some day) Thanks for telling her you have the same doctor and got some help from him. It's always nice to know others who use the same doctor as someone else.

rajaenchen, I'll email you tomorrow. It has been way too hot for me here and it saps me mentally and physically, so hopefully in the morning I'll be better...if it cools down tonight. At least we didn't get the predicted 100 degrees.