Financially poor/Worried I will end up homeless

I was wondering if anyone has had a similar experience. I have been out of work for a while, and I don't qualify for disability. I have been helped financially by my dad but it has gotten to the point where it is hard for him to keep funding me. He makes a lot of money but he has been spending thousands on me medically trying to figure out what is wrong. I have no job, I feel too sick to work, and I am going more and more downhill. I don't know what else to do.

My mom and I used to be so close but I feel she just sees me as a financial drain. I have been to the ER many times and she never asks how I am or what happened. When I have said I feel like I am slowly dying she says I am being ridiculous and annoying her, yet I remember her saying it was so sad about Avril Lavigne and Yolanda Foster and they really went through it, but that is basically where I am at.

The other day my phone got cut off. I told her I wouldn't be able to call because of it. My dad ended up paying it so I could at least make calls if something happens to me, but she was questioning me today asking how I paid for it, and then basically went into one saying she is upset because my grandma has dementia and lives in another country and she may not be able to get over there in time to see her before she goes. I totally get that is heartbreaking, but when it comes to me she just seems to lack so much empathy.

My lease at my apartment is up in 2 months and I don't know what to do. I have been trying to find some sort of job but I just haven't had luck. I feel like I have nobody and this illness is going to win and I am going to end up homeless.

I'm so sorry that your mom has been so unsupportive. Unfortunately a lot of people react that way when someone they care about is in poor health. You are her child and she (emotionally) needs for you to be okay, so she's annoyed with you when you aren't okay! I've dealt with this, too, from loved ones. They don't see how illogical and hurtful it is. It's also possible that she simply cannot hold more than a certain amount of your (completely legitimate) fear and misery. Most of us with this disease are serious downers, at least some of the time, and since our loved ones can't really do anything about it, it's hard for them to absorb those negative energies. This is where support from fellow chronically ill folks and therapists is key. You definitely deserve to complain, vent, and express whatever you need to express, but it sounds like your mom cannot handle any more but doesn't know how to set a boundary in a healthy way to take care of her own support needs. Long story short, people are very bad at being there for other people, much of the time.

The suggestion about a social worker is a good one. Also, why do you not qualify for disability? Many with Lyme have a very hard time qualifying. Even if they apply with a slightly more accepted illness like chronic fatigue syndrome, it still takes a few tries to get accepted.

There's a lot of remote work right now, but our illnesses are unpredictable, making deadlines tough. You definitely are not alone in not being able to support yourself. Is there a way your parents could keep helping you but with lowered expenses - like a cheaper apartment, cheaper phone plan, etc.? Now that you know what's wrong, perhaps your medical bills will be lower. Is there a local co-housing (or cooperative housing) community that you might be able to join?

What kind of treatment are you pursuing right now?

Are you able to function most days - cook food, shower, walk short distances, drive a car, sit or stand, remember basic things - to the degree that you could work? I'm wondering if you can't find work because unemployment is incredibly high (no one else can find a job, either!) or if you think you could not perform a job. Could you apply for unemployment?

We're rooting for you. There's always something else to try.