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Posted 5/27/2014 4:33 PM (GMT 0)
So, last week at about this time, I was in probably the darkest period of my life. Suicidal thoughts, complete and utter hopelessness. Thankfully it only lasted a few days, and then it was just gone. My mood is much brighter for the past few days. But now I am feeling this overwhelming sleepiness all the time. I'm sleeping in the middle of the day when my schedule allows it, which is not like me at all. This feels like when I was pregnant with my second child--I just wanted to sleep all the time. I'm currently taking Azith, Mepron, Cefdinir and pulsing Tindamax, along with a bunch of herbals that I've been on for at least several months. Also Cymbalta and a small dose of Zoloft. Been taking a small dose of Lorazepam at night to sleep. It's working--I've been sleeping 6.5-7 hours straight for the past few nights, which is the most I ever get these days. So the only thing that has changed between the dark, dark mood and now is the Lorazepam. Any ideas re why I'm so darned sleepy? I'd take the sleepiness over the suicidal mood any day, but it's difficult to work full-time and take care of the house, kids, etc. when I feel like nodding off all the time.
Posted 5/27/2014 7:06 PM (GMT 0)
No ideas? Hmmm... I know, I'm stumped too.
Posted 5/27/2014 10:00 PM (GMT 0)
Hi SoScared--I know exactly what you mean about the fatigue. I am 3 months into treatment and still have it. I hope so much
that when all this gets better the fatigue and memory probs go
far away.

I think I will never be completely better, hope I am wrong!
Posted 5/27/2014 10:01 PM (GMT 0)
What is the dose of your Ativan? Is it possible that you're feeling tired during the day because of it? Maybe try a lower dose?
Posted 5/27/2014 11:51 PM (GMT 0)
This is really random, but the desire for sleep might not necessarily be a bad thing....post from drlwilson.com

All Healing Requires Extra Sleep. During the day, one primarily uses the sympathetic nervous system, associated with spending energy and tearing down the body. This is balanced by the parasympathetic system, associated with rest, nurturing and regeneration of body tissues. This is equally important and takes place when one is resting. One may call it maintenance or repair time.

If you skimp on regenerative activity by not sleeping enough, physical and mental performance suffers, as well as one's work and relationships. Illness develops because there is not enough time to repair damaged tissues in the body. If you have a chronic illness, you definitely need extra rest and sleep.

Cleansing and Rebuilding the Body Require Energy. Elimination of toxins, an issue for everyone, occurs primarily at night while the body rests. The removal process requires energy and one's energy is finite. If you use most or all of your energy running around all day, you will not detoxify well.

In short, there is no substitute for sleep. Also, sleep is anything but a waste of time. It is an essential part of each person’s daily life that can also be a rich time of not only rejuvenation, but of insights and other healing processes.
Posted 5/28/2014 12:31 AM (GMT 0)
I'm taking 1mg. of Ativan.

Re the regenerative qualities of sleep--that makes so much sense. But how to get as much sleep as my body seems to want when I have to work one full-time job, one part-time job, take care of a house and kids, and look for another job at the same time?
Posted 5/28/2014 3:59 AM (GMT 0)
Soscared-- you will have to think of a cool new screen name when you aren't Soscared anymore!

I was e x h a u s t e d all the time with Lyme! Before any other symptoms I noticed I was on the couch all summer hardly functional. I have a friend now who has a "mystery illness" guess what he's exhausted all the time and shares many of our symptoms... Trying t get him to my llmd.

The good news is this exhaustion goes away when healed!!! I have TonS of energy now. And a cup of coffee now and then helps too!!

I also was suicidal-- how scary it is to admit that huh? I honestly almost didn't make it to the other side but yay!!!! So happy I held on. You have Bart too? Sorry can't remember....

My hope is you'll return to a more amazing life than before -- like me.

Xo
Sarah
Posted 5/28/2014 9:23 AM (GMT 0)
I am always sleepy and exhausted. Just this week, I fell asleep twice behind my computer at work. I could sleep just about everywhere at any time (except at night, then there is the insomnia)!

You had a very emotional stressful time, don't forget that times like that take a huge toll on your energy levels. Your body reacts to stress with the release of more adrenalin, and that can really wear you out.

Try to recuperate as much as possible, rest all you can and mind your diet, that will help. 

Posted 5/28/2014 12:05 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks, ladies. Sarah, I so hope you're right. Thank you for sharing that you felt suicidal, too. It's nice to know that others came out the other side of such a dark, dark time to feel much better. In desperation the other day, I had a cup of coffee. I have been avoiding caffeine for the most part for more than six months. But the coffee helped so much! Why are we supposed to avoid caffeine at a time when we need it the most? Is a daily cup O.K? Right now it's 8:05. a.m. I slept fairly well with 1 mg. of Ativan and 1/4 teaspoon of Chinese Skullcap--about 11:30 to 5:45 straight through, which is a HUGE improvement from the waking every 1 to 2 hours that I was doing several months ago. But I feel like I haven't slept at all. All I wanna do is crawl back into bed. Of course I can't, because I have to work. I think I'm gonna head to Dunkin' Donuts for a coffee after my early appointment. Then I'll try to get a nap in later today. This is so hard--but a thousand times better than the suicidal thoughts. I have to keep that in mind!
Posted 5/28/2014 4:30 PM (GMT 0)
Marie-- l o v e how are are Always there for others. What a selfless person you are-- and that is a GIFT not many of us have. You're an encourager and should be doing something in your career to monetize those wonderful traits.

Soscared-- you are welcome hun. H a n g in there girl. Not sure why people say no coffee (I think it's because our adrenals are shot already?) but when one is that depressed and suicidal have a cup of coffee. Please. My LlMD says only have one and make sure it's organic. Love him. Do what you need to do to stay alive and beat these infections. And sounds like to at least got more sleep than usual - even though you feel exhausted sounds like progress!!

Look how life can change in a dime:

Went from barely working-- my business suffered so much when I was sick to now.... Only 4 months later I'm so busy I'm going to have to hire someone to help. Loving my job and making a healthy living in my field.

Went from living in a cold feeling and small apartment to living in a beautiful open spaced home.

Went from suicidal and hopeless depressed sick sick sick to SO healthy, energetic, happy, grateful almost all of the time.

Bought an adorable Prius! A car more inline with my environmental values.

Would have begged, stole or borrowed to receive the physical and psychological help I needed to: how in the heck am I going to start a Lyme awareness campaign and blog etc. And help other fellow sufferers to help reduce or prevent this suffering!?

And we're planning a surf and yoga retreat in Nicaragua next year-- yay!!!

Go enjoy a hot and wonderful cup of coffee girl.

Love ya,
Sarah
Posted 5/28/2014 8:13 PM (GMT 0)
Sarah, thank you so much for your kind words, feels good, you brought a smile to my face (after a stressful day, the best remedy). Thank you.

Hug,
Marie
Posted 5/28/2014 9:44 PM (GMT 0)
Hugs Marie-- it's sooooo true!! Hope the rest of your day is more restful- xoxo
Posted 5/29/2014 12:22 AM (GMT 0)
Sarah and Marie--you're both so wonderfully encouraging. Thank you! I DID have a cup of coffee--and it helped tremendously! It's funny--the sleepiness is following the same pattern that the anxiety and then depression did--worst in the morning, and then slowly improving as the day progresses. Wonder what hormone, etc. is causing that? When my worst symptom is anxiety, it is almost always gone by late afternoon. Ditto depression. And now the sleepiness.

Sarah--what is your business?

Marie--hope your evening is rejuvenating!

Oh, and re the question about Bart earlier, Sarah--I don't know. I was diagnosed via blood test with Babs, Micoplasma and Ehrlichia. Lyme test (Western Blot) positive only on band 41. Doc thought I might have Bart because Anxiety/depression were my most persistently lingering symptoms, and Babs treatment wasn't alleviating them. One month of Rifampin DID seem to help a lot, but I asked doc to change it because of its effects upon Malarone/Mepron (it reduces effectiveness by up to 50%). My thought was that since I definitely have Babs, and we're not sure about Bart, I needed to make the most of my months of Malarone/Mepron. I think I'll ask him to put me back on Rifampin for a month or two after the Mepron is done, if I'm still experiencing psych symptoms.

Post Edited (soscared13) : 5/28/2014 6:29:12 PM (GMT-6)

Posted 5/29/2014 5:09 AM (GMT 0)
Sohealedbythefall! Hahaha. That's your new nickname girl.

Well it certainly sounds from the depression/and anxiety like you have Bart. Big bad Bart as heather's dad would say! So I get focusing on the other stuff, wondering, though, if you could start an herbal protocol now like adding HH tea and maybe taking A-Bart or other microbials ? That's what I would do-- why not it couldn't hurt (in the off chance that you don't have Bart too!) I haven't heard of any of the other infections causing this deep of depression/anxiety -- so that's what makes me think you have Bart. I didn't test positive for Bart either but I CLEARLy had it and we treated it.

Oh yeah for me also the intensity of the anxiety, depression etc peaks first thing in the morn-- up until early afternoon, then by then most days I felt 1/2 way normal by mid afternoon and often into the evening. Made no sense. Bizarre, huh? But I bet super common.

So-not-scared-by-the-fall: my business is yoga/yoga therapy and I l o v e every second of it. Serving people in this energetic manner is wonderful except when you're sick because my energy sucked!!!

Night night love bugs-
Sarah
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