Posted 7/19/2014 9:07 AM (GMT 0)
Currently, I have a LOT of symptoms, I really do. But a lot of them don't happen every day, or all at once. They're also usually not that severe. I've had two shaking "attacks" that I described back in the first post I made here. By the third one I realized that my body did better if I was upright instead of laying down, and then clued in that my legs seemed cold even though I couldn't feel them, and when I started making sure to lay down at more of an incline and bundle up during the attack, my third one was much more mild and shorter lived (it also gets accompanied by difficulty breathing, stomach issues and deep anxiety). I almost started having a forth one but as soon as I felt the anxiety creep in and my leg start twitching I bundled up right away and started trying to get my blood circulating and it didn't set in. My GP things that it's Raynaud's Phenomenon, likely something that I would have had that would of been more subdued (like how many people just have the change in colour of their skin and the discomfort) if I didn't have the lyme disease to make it more aggressive. So, those are new, and they're fairly bad. I've been worse since December, but not as bad as I was a year after when I believe I was first infected. At that time I was very, very sick for 3 months of the very worst of it, followed by about 6 months of continual pain that often left me with very little mobility.
Now, aside from the shaking attacks, which I'm happy to say I have now gone almost two weeks without, I mainly have flu-ish symptoms and brain fog, accompanied with some lingering anxiety and what I consider to be mild joint pains (I also have four impacted wisdom teeth right now though, so I know that this is going to aggravate my pain more, because I've had TMJ syndrome since I was a kid). I did a long detox foot bath tonight and it really helped my flu-ish symptoms (I think I might have been herxing a bit, because I was forcing myself to get out in the sun and heat and get exercise and eat better) and my brain fog has actually massively cleared up, it's been a few hours now and it still hasn't returned, though I am getting sleepy now because it's late at night.
My question is, if anyone feels they can provide any insight or experience at all-- how likely do you think it is that I may get worse? My hope is that since my symptoms still don't seem "severe" that if I start detoxing and doing whatever natural treatment I can as soon as we get it all sorted out, that I'll improve. Even if it doesn't all completely go away, I would be fine with that! I can live with this being at a slightly more manageable level, if I don't have to worry so much about the shaking attacks getting intense, and if the other symptoms can back off a bit, I would be able to be happy like that. Any extra recovery from that point is just icing on the cake.
But I am worried, since I did start getting worse in December and it stayed fairly bad, what if it can get even worse from here again? Mind you, then I didn't think that I had lyme, and I was under a lot of stress and I wasn't eating well at all (college math course on top of my full course load plus trying to work). I don't know. I suppose I'm just afraid. All I want is to be well enough that I can continue my schooling in September, be happy being a student, and then be healthy enough to really help others the way I know I can, and am best suited to do.
I read somewhere that the majority of chronic lyme patients actually don't develop severe symptoms, or even neurological symptoms. I'm hoping I fit into that majority. I really don't want for this to get any worse, and I want it to just be.. livable. When the shaking first started happening and I didn't know what was going on, I was so.. sad. I was scared but mostly I was sad and I sat in the ER and cried, not knowing what my future would be like.
I'm trying my very best to be optimistic. A part of me thinks my chances are good, I'm not doing that bad right now, not compared to how bad it could be. And now I have an idea of what's going on and how I can treat it. I'm hoping it only gets better from here, but sometimes hoping is the most difficult part.
Sorry for the rant. I guess I just really need support, but I also want the truth and any experiences or information. Thanks for reading all of this.