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quick question as i wait on blood for peace of mind.

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Posted 1/19/2016 2:57 AM (GMT 0)
ANyone ever just feel disconnected from there self? Not like a out of body experience just more so like you feel more like a pair of eyes then a person like you just visualize everything and are going through motions of life but not actually particapating?
I dont know its hard to describe,I cook and lay on the couch but it dosnt feel like im doing what im doing.The best way to explain it is is i feel absent from myself.I feel insane honestly.But I know everyone around me,I know were i am (though sometimes it dosnt feel like it) and i know what im saying when i talk(though i feel like i dont make sense sometimes)
Thank you in advance for answering my paranoia questions lol
Posted 1/19/2016 3:22 AM (GMT 0)
Yes, I've had my version of that. I think it's called
'floating'. It's real and it stinks. You are not alone in what you're experiencing.
Posted 1/19/2016 3:28 AM (GMT 0)
its totally new to me.Ive been dealing with it for about a month give or take a week or 2 lol.
I had an accident when i was younger i litterately blew my leg off with a shotgun.Didnt faze me a bit my girlfriend was more concerned then i was i wanted to go home and fix it myself lol
the reason i bring that up is because i would gladly gladly do it all over again then to deal with any of what im dealing with lol.None of my doctors seem to know whats going on or care.My psychiatrist dosnt even seem to really know whats going on.My family is terrified im terrified lol.It is just one huge mess lol

Thank you.I know it dosnt cure it by someone saying i been there but for some reason it gives you a good sigh of relief lol.Its weird but it does.Thank you again.
Posted 1/19/2016 4:15 AM (GMT 0)
I feel like I am watching 'life', not really fully participating in it...hard to describe.

I remember a couple years ago saying to my husband "I dont know who I am anymore" and this was only after about 5 months of being ill.

Of course he didnt know what I was talking about.
Posted 1/19/2016 4:24 AM (GMT 0)
Thats pretty much how i feel.N everything looks weird/different almost unfamilliar though i have lived here since i was 13 im almost 23 now.I have alot of weird n out of it thoughts that come from these feelings as well.I tell ya it is pretty scary Honestly terrifying.My psychologist says "you are handling this very well" and i think in my head yea i look fine i seem fine and i seem content but on the inside im kicking and screaming lol.

Thank you girlie.N i know what ya mean by hard to explain.Everything is hard to explain with me right now.N that worrys me n makes me think im not explaining things right or something lol.
Posted 1/19/2016 4:33 AM (GMT 0)
You're welcome ghost! That is why this forum is so great...we can say what we're feeling...and people here
'get it'.

I find even when my pain isn't really bad...I still don't get much done around the house...it's like I'm spinning my wheels....so unorganized...and next thing i know it's 4:00 in the afternoon...and I'm lucky if I unloaded the dishwasher and made my bed...actually I don't really make my bed...I just quickly pull the comforter up...lol.
Posted 1/19/2016 4:42 AM (GMT 0)
lol.I never make my bed.I think its a waste of time lol! not only is this forrum for lyme but our little dirty secrets to lol!!
Did you ever kind of ferget you were even alive? i know its weird but sometimes i feel like i forget im alive but its only for a few seconds or minutes.
Posted 1/19/2016 4:55 AM (GMT 0)
I haven't had that feeling that I forget I'm alive.

That would be a strange feeling.
Posted 1/19/2016 5:13 AM (GMT 0)
This aint living...or its some kind of hell on earth..slow death...are you getting igenix ghost?...dont take idk for an answer ...22 docs later...im not sure i wanna treat now i know..and side fx..horror stories cost...it has robbed me of everything i was...i tore achilles when younger and it was a walk in the park by comparison ...so i get your shotgun scenario. ...
Posted 1/19/2016 5:26 AM (GMT 0)
It is weird very weird.Im not sure if thats really what it is or not to be forsure but thats what i think it is.lol
i am actually trying to get a doctor to do it so far no luck with that lol.But hopefully someone says theyll do it tomorrow gonna be calling again tomorrow to some places.
Posted 1/19/2016 5:32 AM (GMT 0)
the forgetting im alive part could just be anxiety as im past witts end not knowing forsure whats going on.I dont want to take anytype of medication because they all have side effects that outweigh the problem lol.But who knows maybe its i just feel so out of my head i accept it and then i sit and think that i thought i thought i was dead lol.Its confusing i know lol.
Posted 1/19/2016 1:10 PM (GMT 0)
I can relate to what's been described on here - it's called "depersonalization".

I remember in my earlier days of treatment with Buhner's protocols a post I made on here about not knowing who my emotional self was anymore....and people could relate.

For me, the depersonalization was part of a herx and I'm happy I no longer deal with it.

Proper treatment will surely help.
Posted 1/19/2016 2:00 PM (GMT 0)
I often feel weird - spacey and almost like I'm in a dream. It comes and goes. I had it the other day and it felt like I had a slight buzz from alcohol. I will be glad when I am fully clear headed again.
Posted 1/19/2016 10:18 PM (GMT 0)
Im glad yall can relate to me.It makes me feel a little better.lol
I have one more question.In the begining i just felt weird and off but i could still go places.N then i slowly just kept deteriorating to were i couldnt go places.But i still felt comfortable at home and around my family.But now i dont even feel comfortable at home and even my family makes me feel weird.I feel like a snowball effect honestly.Anyone else get those or had those feelings?
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