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Posted 7/19/2016 12:15 AM (GMT 0)
Feeling discouraged with this journey, and drawing comfort from knowing this is probably a normal and natural part of the process. This is such a costly thing to deal with, and at this rate, my savings will be gone in just a few months. I met someone by chance about how difficult it was to make ends meet in our community and she encouraged me to reach out to a local food bank. I got news that I qualify and am going to make use of this resource. What food I get will help with food costs that I can use towards herbs. I will continue to stay away from gluten, sugar, dairy - and it may not all be organic, but at this point, I need to start planning for the long haul. I put in some organic lettuce, and planted herb. I feel like a failure for making use of this resource. Feels humiliating. Some things improving and some flat out getting worse - like this sore throat I have had on and off since October. Muscle cramping so so so intense the other night. I see an ENT this week. All of a sudden my bulk herbs are really hard to get down in a tea form... they make me gag... Moon phase pain flare.
Detox, detox, detox....
So pooped having a hard time keeping up and paying the price of spending time with friends... which exhausts me the next few days.

Thanks for listening...
Posted 7/19/2016 12:30 AM (GMT 0)
Aww...I'm sorry you're having a rough time Questing! I've had many of those times during my journey.

Recently I was having a pretty good stretch...and then today - BAM - not so good...and all the bad thoughts creep back in...

It's a horrible disease...that people just don't understand - unless you have it...

That is good you have the food bank to help reduce your food costs. I know it's humbling...but remember - this is temporary.


Hope you feel better soon

(((hugs)))
Posted 7/19/2016 1:09 AM (GMT 0)
Don't beat yourself up. Services are available for when people need them. Perhaps one day you will be able to return the favor in some way.

Sorry you are having a difficult time with your herbs. It's always a roller coaster ride. Hopefully you will feel better soon.
Posted 7/19/2016 1:38 AM (GMT 0)
been there questing since 2 years ago when i got infected. i basically dropped off the grid as i didn't have the energy or time to focus on all the things pre-infection. it's a part of the process for most of us but things do get better they're just typically measured in very slow increments over a long period of time. some initial symptoms fade and others popped up for example my chest "thumping" didn't appear until over a year after being bit.

it's a hard road and you have your ups and downs. the good days (or moments) make the bad days that much harder to deal with since you are feeling more like your old self. given your finances try to be very targeted in what you're doing to help yourself. a clean diet, supplements when you need them and abx/herbs. don't do more than your body can handle.
Posted 7/19/2016 4:31 PM (GMT 0)
Such sound counsel - thanks for all of your kind words and reflections on your journey. It helps knowing others have the ups and downs and it sure helps the affirmation on where the focus ought be: my mantra - clean diet, supplements, herbs, mindful about pacing...
Posted 7/19/2016 4:41 PM (GMT 0)
Hang in there, Questing!! I can't afford to eat all organic either, and must do without some things that I know would be helpful to have, but our budget only goes so far.

You are not a failure at all!! I have used you (anonymously, of course) as an example of "stick-to-it-ness" to a few others that I am in contact with on other sites! You may be, as you suspected, just going through a rough spot and you will come out on the other side and be the cheerful and determined you that you have been!!

Do be sure to come here for support during this time too!! We don't care that you don't have a happy, upbeat, exciting thing to share, we care about supporting YOU as you go through all of this. Of course, we do love to see you as the happy, upbeat person you usually are, but this is generally one of the toughest things many of us have been through in our lives and we need to be able to lean on those that can understand this when things get rough or overwhelming!!

Many ((((((((((Hugs)))))))))) for you today!!!!
Posted 7/19/2016 5:04 PM (GMT 0)
Yes ..i get you..i am tired and wanna live..am i treating hard enough ?too hard ?
Posted 7/19/2016 5:23 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Questing!-

I am so sorry that you are feeling very discouraged right now.

Lyme disease and co- infections will test us mentally, physically, emotionally, and financially to our breaking points.

I am happy that you came here for support when you needed it the most. Because nobody else understands the up's and downs better than others with Lyme.

Please don't be ashamed for using a food bank. This is the reason food banks exist. It is to help people.

I struggle from guilt for not working and not being a "productive" member of society. I try to constantly remind myself, that I am sick right now, but it will get better.

Sending you many ((((Hugs!))))) to get through this difficult time.

Best Wishes!
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