Having a rough day. Just want my life back.

Sick since August 2019. Been on rifampin/azithromycin for two months now. Started buhners bart protocol two weeks ago. Mixed in cryptolepis a week ago just to see if it did anything for my swollen head/pressure feeling - which I actually had some days where I noted it felt less swollen. Who knows what if anything helped.

I’ve had no positive tests so treating this on a clinical diagnosis for bart.

Was having some improvements on mood and neuro pain. Yesterday the neuro pain showed back up and today the depression came back. And by depression I mean like I just don’t see a point in living like this. I’m 24. Worked out regularly before I got sick, didn’t drink excessively, diet wasn’t terrible. Believe I moved into a moldy apartment which caused my immune system disruption. Or I got bit and never realized it. Maybe both. The whole thing just feels so unfair and out of my control. Take this. Wait a month. Over and over and over.

I’m just so tired of fighting something that I have no clue if it’s really working, if I’m even treating the right thing. I’ve had to doctor hop twice once I realized my ND was over focused on the mold (moved and used CSM for months) and my other integrative doc wanted me to spend thousands on IV’s with no diagnosis. I’m taking plenty of nutritional support and detox etc.. Working with a functional doc now who started the abx.

Hoping this is maybe some herx from throwing in buhners protocol.

I realize a lot of people have been at this for years and years which terrifies me that I’m never going to solve this..

I’m just rambling at this point. I don’t have anyone around me who can really understand what this is like and was in need of some venting today.

Thanks for taking the time to read.