Why do I feel so alone?

I've been dxd with MS for over 14 years now, and it seems I feel so alone having MS.  Of course, my family knows about my MS, as do some friends, and I've even come

across some coworkers who have MS.  But I don't understand why I feel so alone and useless.  I've gone to college, bought a house, married a woman who loves me,

have young children.  Everything should be hunky dory.

So, what the ****?  I don't wanna feel like this. 

The other day while driving home, I ran over a rodent.  I wanted to burst into tears.  I didn't wanna hit it, but couldn't avoid it.  I'm now scared to death I'll be driving and

a small child will happen into the street, and I won't be able to get my clumsy feet to hit the brake in time. 

I feel old, but I shouldn't (I'm 32 yrs old). 

I'm afraid for what comes next in life.  I don't feel I"m strong enough to handle whatever it will be.  It's crazy to be feeling like this. 

Thoughts anyone??

I understand what you are going through. I am only a year older than you and was diagnosed 4 years ago. I cry really easily too and feel really alone. It's hard because, for me and maybe you feel this way also, I don't want people to feel sorry for me or treat me like I might break, but I would appreciate a little understanding and sympathy when I am having an attack or a bad day. When those closest to you aren't giving you that, you feel really depressed and alone. I cry a lot every day; I cry myself to sleep most night. And I don't say this to make someone feel sorry for me - I don't tell anyone about this, but I am telling you and others on this board because I feel like you will understand, whereas my husband, for instance, will just get frustrated that I am upset and ignore it instead of trying to help me deal with it. It's also scary not knowing what our MS will do to us - tomorrow, next week, next year...whenever. It really frightens me.

In circumstances like this, maybe the best thing we can do is realize we are deserving of love and respect, even if we aren't getting it from the person we want it from. It hurts, so crying is okay. Holding it all in isn't good. If you are religious, pray. Prayer changes us and makes us better, and that is what it is meant to do.