Hey Everyone
Has anyone ever dreamed about NOT having MS and considered it bad?? Well i dreamed that last night. I dreamed i was having all these symptoms...in full force...and went to the doc to let him see it for himself. He felt it was serious and left the room to order some tests. In the meantime another doc came in and told me i wasn't sick at all and that all this was in my mind. I DON"T have MS or anything else and should just go home and forget about this. GEEZ...mad wasn't the word. But that only lasted a few mins...then lost was the word. I've had this on my mind for sometime now. How do u move on and try to forget about this, yet deal with symptoms (obvious or not) and not think about it?? I fear this is going to go on and on and i'll never know what's causing it. It may not be ms at all...but whatever it is i realize it's not at all appearant to the doc other than what i tell them or they may be able to see intermittingly. How long do u go on treating symptoms? There has to come a time when u figure things out and can move past this. The giant question mark sitting over my head is getting kinda heavy and i can only imagine the poor people who live without knowing for years or ever. I sit down or lay down and my legs, arms, fingers, BODY, JAW jump or jerk. My face twitches and makes faces of it's own. Those are the pretty constant things. Not too often anymore are the probs with balance, speech issues and memory probs. I, by no means, feel i'm suffering or in the worst possible situation. I know many, many others are much worse off...but for me...compared to my normal self...this isn't good. I guess this thread is only to say the things on my mind. I know i'm not the only person questioning these things in their lives and i know many who may read this will be able to relate and i hope they find some comfort in seeing they aren't the only ones with these feelings. Best wishes to u all who are in my boat with me.
rhonda