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Getting so depressed...

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Multiple Sclerosis
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Posted 11/29/2006 5:15 PM (GMT 0)
Hi all,

Am just getting so bummed... I am still in probable MS land and will probably be there for a while... I have an opthomologist appt on Jan 12 cause the MS specialist wants to test my field of view... I had a t-spine MRI sunday for which I do not know the results. Left a message for the doc yesterday, but naturally she will call me at her own sweet time if at all. And I am so tired! I went to a friends party on Sat just to have osme friends comment on "how tired" I looked... The two friends whom I thought were my closest whom I have actually shared info have backed away from me... In fact, I think they have become best friends with each other! Oh well.. I have my Europe trip for which I leave next Saturday (the 9th) for which my husband STILL hasnt gotten his stamped visas back yet!!! And once he gets london, he still needs the one for Paris! darn we are cutting it close! Am so stressed and scared he wont get it on time... THen work...Oh work...Am SO tired but have to put in all these hours (am a lawyer) and this is my last "billable" week of the year so putting in all these hours to meet target... Hubby instead of being sensitive has been even edgier cause its his most stressful time at work so he gets annoyed with me at the drop of a hat... darn doc wont tell me my result.. Said if I have lesion on my t-spine she can confirm the diagnosis... Can  you understand WHY I would want the results sooner than later??! Doctors are REALLY getting on my nerves now...I swear...And my hands hurt soooo  bad....just needed to vent.  

Posted 11/29/2006 7:03 PM (GMT 0)
Hey ConfusedGal

Vent...vent and vent more. We all understand fully here. Things just seem to pile up when u'r already feeling stressed and the stress from an unknown illness is even greater. Hang on...as hard as it feels to do right now... and u WILL get thru this. I keep u in my prayers and i know as hard as this all is, u'r gonna be fine.

It'd be easy for me to say don't worry about u'r friends, but i can tell u i've been there and it hurts bad. I had a very close friend who betrayed me and at the same time a new friend moved into our lives. She'd been becomming very close friends with us both, but in the end seemed to be better friends with my best friend. That hurt because i was the third person in an apparant couple and just had no place there. It wasn't the end of the world and i've made some good friends since...a few very good friends whom i'd call my best friend and one is in the same place as me...limbo...and understands entirely what i'm dealing with. That's like gold. Maybe u need someone who can relate. I can tell u that without having been thru what i've already been thru...i couldn't have understood all this. I imagine u'r friends feel that same way. As Uppity said before, come here and tell us u'r worries and troubles and we'll be here. U can't see us, but we're here and we understand.

Hang on...it seems so hard now, but u'll make it.

rhonda
Posted 11/29/2006 7:03 PM (GMT 0)
CG,

The waiting can be horrible. So I understand completely.

I also have a visual field test coming up on the 7th. At my last neuro appt. he found a blind spot in my right eye. I can still see but it is blue and blurry in one area. Hard to explain. The test is really boring but not painful. My right optic nerve is large and nobody can figure out why. I've even been told it was a birth defect but no one discovered it until I was 23 and I've worn glasses since I was 9.

I know my hubby gets stressed around the hollidays. He'll be edgy and snappy with everyone, but I'm the same way. He's probably concerned about you! It is hard to see a loved one go through medical problems. Men want to fix things and it is hard to fix something when no one knows what is wrong.

Enjoy your vacation and maybe when you get back you'll feel better.

Good luck and keep us posted.

Lysha
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