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Can we make a pact?

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Posted 5/21/2010 8:26 AM (GMT 0)

vette guy said...
I've been reading some of my husbands old posts. When I rread this I laughed out loud. I haven't laughed in almost a month! He really hated THAT word.


I have only just realised that this is an old thread. Forgive me for asking but is Vette guy no longer around?

Suzy
Posted 5/21/2010 9:43 AM (GMT 0)
I personally like the word bag better and continue to use it wherever I go. If I ever said: "Oh no, my pouch" at my firehouse I would get smacked in the face ;) though the word does sound a lot nicer and I will try to use it and I don't see much of a big deal using either.
Posted 5/21/2010 11:10 AM (GMT 0)

Suzy2 said...
[I have only just realised that this is an old thread. Forgive me for asking but is Vette guy no longer around?

Suzy

Suzy~he passed away a few months ago.
Posted 5/21/2010 11:19 AM (GMT 0)

OHIO76 said...

Suzy2 said...
[I have only just realised that this is an old thread. Forgive me for asking but is Vette guy no longer around?

Suzy

Suzy~he passed away a few months ago.

I really am sorry to learn that, my condolences to Vette guys family.
Posted 5/21/2010 12:46 PM (GMT 0)
oh man, that is horrible. My condolences as well. I will use pouch from now on!
Posted 5/21/2010 9:26 PM (GMT 0)
I think it would be good if posters using old threads would make that clear and maybe not use their spouses ID's either. This whole thread was misconstrued by several posters but maybe that was the whole point of the re-posting it in the first place. Kathy, your husband's posts were quite strong and I reserve the right to respond in kind - your reposting them without pointing out that they were old is pretty passive/aggressive.
Posted 5/22/2010 2:18 AM (GMT 0)

cleo35 said...
I think it would be good if posters using old threads would make that clear and maybe not use their spouses ID's either. This whole thread was misconstrued by several posters but maybe that was the whole point of the re-posting it in the first place. Kathy, your husband's posts were quite strong and I reserve the right to respond in kind - your reposting them without pointing out that they were old is pretty passive/aggressive.

Cry me a river, Cleo. If you lived in my town, chances are that my husband would have spent hours and hours with you at the hospital.....usually after normal visiting hours. I'm sorry. But I can't let anyone speak against Mike. He is an angel. He will always be my angel.

Kathy.......AKA Vette Lady

Posted 5/22/2010 5:53 AM (GMT 0)

Suzy2 said...
Until recently I had not been to this site for a couple of years. During the last few months of me coming here a one off experience I had here made me feel like I was such a bad person. I was shot down in flames for using the B word. In the same post that I had used the B word I had made an attempt at some humor too. I had used humor to try and make the situation we were all in (Having an Ostomy) to try and show the new or about to become new Ostomates that having an Ostomy doesn't in most case have to be seen as a negative thing and that regardless of our individual situations we were still People with individual personalities and we could still enjoy life and have fun. The person that responded to my post responded in a very negative way and made me feel like I must be stupid to refer to the pouch as a B and that I should know better.

The person that had responded to me in that way also said something extremely hurtful to me about the fact that I had used "baglady' as my forum name, insinuating that maybe that must be what I am(Someone living on the streets etc) I tried to not take those words too personally due to the other member possibly misunderstanding my intentions plus the fact I realised that they may be having a tough time with illness or ostomy or whatever at the time and were lashing out and I happened to get in the way.

I live in England and I have always used the word bag because thats what it was called in hospital, my Ostomy nurse used the term and I felt and do still feel comfortable with it.

vette guy, In your reply to Shaz you said..... " The "b" word repulses me, as it should you as well" .... Although I respect your opinion and feelings towards the word I can not agree that 'WE 'SHOULD' ALL' find the word repulsive because the reality is that many of us don't find it repulsive and if thats how we feel about it then thats just the way it is.

On saying that I do respect your opinion and I will keep that in my mind when I post but I am not going to promise never to use the word again because no doubt I will use it without thinking sometimes because it is natural for me as I am so used to it.

The capitals by the way were not me shouting I was usuing them as a highlight ;-)

Suzy (I tried changing forum name to just Suzy but it wouldn't let me so I have to be Suzy2 lol.

Suzy,

I'm so sorry if I offended you. I never meant that to happen.  This isn't Vette guy, but his wife Kathy. My darling died 8 weeks ago. Please accept my apogy

Posted 5/22/2010 7:45 AM (GMT 0)
Kathy, thank you for apology but you personally have not offended me. The situation I wrote about happened a couple of years back and I have no idea who that member was at the time.

I really am so very sorry that you have lost your Husband and I can understand why you would want to go back over his posts, I would probably do the same. It would be really helpful though if maybe you could make a new ID for yourself here as Cleo suggested, that way there will be no confusion as to who has posted what. New People that join and ones that have not been here in a while such as myself will not realise that Vette guy has passed away.

You have my deepest sympathy and I hope that you have good family and friends that are helping you through what must be a very difficult time for you.

Big hugs

Suzy
Posted 5/22/2010 3:04 PM (GMT 0)
kathy-I think it might be eaiser on you to have a new ID also.
And I really hope you will stay around, you have experince as the spouse of someone wtih an ostomy, and lots of people are worried about how their spouses will react and how they will deal.
Mike was always such a help to people with his postive attitude, that im sure you could carry that on by helping other people!
Posted 5/23/2010 1:41 PM (GMT 0)
Kathy~please stay around! You have another perspective that can help others, too.

I like "Vette Lady", too, for your ID:)
Posted 5/24/2010 7:56 PM (GMT 0)
Kathy: and this is my last comment on the topic; my comments were in response to Mike's posts - I think you'll agree I have a right to my opinion just as he did - I was wasn't "speaking against" him I was disagreeing with him, in your mind are those two things the same?? My bigger gripe is with you - reposting his posts as if they were recent and NOT letting anyone know that you were doing so was creepy AND passive/agressive.
Posted 5/25/2010 4:11 AM (GMT 0)

cleo35 said...
Kathy: and this is my last comment on the topic; my comments were in response to Mike's posts - I think you'll agree I have a right to my opinion just as he did - I was wasn't "speaking against" him I was disagreeing with him, in your mind are those two things the same?? My bigger gripe is with you - reposting his posts as if they were recent and NOT letting anyone know that you were doing so was creepy AND passive/agressive.

Cleo-Please accept my apologies.  But 8 weeks ago I spent the afternoon scrubbing my husbands brain off my son's bedroom wall. Please try to show a little sympathy.

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