Hi, I'm new to this forum

Hey everybody, I just wanted to introduce myself.  I in the past have posted on the UC forum and everybody was so helpfull.  The support was great especially last summer when I was hospitalized twice with pan colitis.  Anyways, I'm due to have surgery the 1st of August.  I was in remission for awhile after my "new" doctor (my husband was relocated last winter) doubled the dose and frequency of my remicade.  But it has stopped being affective, so before I get totally sick again I've decided to have my colon removed.  It's a 2 step surgery.  I'm a little freaked out about dealing, changing and cleaning the bag and stoma area and I'm very nervous about the surgery.  I'm a mom of a 6 yr old little girl and a 2 1/2 little boy.  My mind wanders to "what ifs" and I think of the worst when it comes to the surgery.  What if I dont wake up, what if I have a stroke during it, etc. 

I also wonder what recovery will really be like.  In my head I think it will be life as usual other than my new appliance and not lift over 10 lbs.  Am I going to be able to take care of my kids.  I'm supposed to be having the surgery laproscopically, but the surgeon says it's possible once he gets in there that it turns into an open incision.

Anyways thanks for listening.  I've learned a lot by all of you already.  thank you

would you say a prayer for me too??   - to be completely honest i have near enough lost my faith in God after all my suffering over the last 11 years.  i wish my consultnat would leave me some bowel, but he won't as he says i wont get any better.  i dont have any peace about surgery - my worse fear is that i either become incontinent (requiring an ileostomy) or my small bowel is totally screwed now and wont work after surgery (i got CI after a sigmoid colectomy for volvulus and have abused laxative intake for the last year).

 thanks so much.

Hi. I am also a mom of 3 boys, 9 yrs 6 yrs and 3 yrs old. I totally understand what you are going through. I am a post op for 2 months now and recovering well. Before sx I even dig all our insurances, making notes and telling my husband what i want to be done if something bad happens during the sx. And honestly I keep on crying every night always asking why do I have to be in this situation, I'm young and still full of ambitions and I have children to take care of. But I didn't blame God giving me this faith because I always believe there's always a reason why. I keep my prayers and stay strong for the sake of my children and husband. I have really ask God for an extension. Do the same thing just hold on and everything will be alright.
You will really need assistance after surgery especially on the first month.Follow all the drs advices and take time. Give yourself a time to heal, don't speed up and you can take care of your children again. Your life will be back. I am not there yet but I believe I will. Each day I am feeling stronger and stronger.
I am not on the same case as yours . I am dx FAP(familial adenomatous polyposis)and a stage I colon cancer out from few on those polyps so I have to undergo Total Colectomy. My total colon was out, my small
intestine was connected to my rectum. I am now free of cancer ,hoping it won't go back.
My thoughts and prayers for your recovery. God bless ahead!

i was really scared too and that is totally normal, like you i went through every single awful thing that could happen! and some of them were so stupid, like what if they miss and cut my eye out? or what if i fall off the table? i mean dumb stuff, it's just your nerves though!
at the time my son was almost two, and it was really really hard for me, they told me not to lift over 20lbs and he was more than that. So he lived with my grandma for the first five weeks, then came home and a friend stayed over when my husband was at work. That was the hardest part for me. I could have taken care of him after the first two weeks, but i couldnt lift him. With the 6 year old i would think you would be ok, however you won't be getting around too good at first. I hope i didnt' freak you out just now. If you have someone who can stay with you while your husband isn't home, or can keep the kids then that would be for the best.
good luck!

Well, I'm obviously not a mom, but my son was 3 years old when I had my ostomy surgery in '89. I remember one time in particular, before my surgery,  when my son wanted me to play with him in the backyard and I couldn't because I was in so much pain from Crohn's. Though I was a 28 year old man at the time, I cried like a little girl over it. I remember thinking to myself "what's the point of living if I can't even throw a ball around with my little boy"? On a side note.....my father died of a brain tumor when I was quite young. As a result I hardly ever really knew him. I remember when my son was born I was overjoyed. But, this @#$%ing disease was preventing me from being the father I wanted to be. Thanks to ostomy surgery I was the coach for his softball, soccer, and basketball teams. He's away at school now, but he is my best friend......umm....tied with my wife, of course.

The moral to my story is this:

Not only does ostomy surgery enrich your life, it also enriches the lives of those around you!

I think I've been over optimistic on how well I'll feel after surgery.  When I got out of the hospital last summer after a really bad UC flare I could barely walk or even get out of a chair without help.  Forget about lifting my baby into his highchair or crib.  I couldn't do anything I was so weak.  We ended up flying my mother in law in from the east coast (we are west coast) to help for 3 weeks b/c I couldn't do anything.  I'm not anticipating being so weak this time around, I'm in fairly good condition now and am hoping to maintain it until surgery.  Less than 2 weeks to go!  Anyways were any of you bed ridden afterwards without having complications?  Am I going to be able to simple things like cook dinner and bathe my kids? Thanks for all your input and help.  You guys rock!

i wouldnt' have tried to bathe my child, not only because of the lifting thing, but also because you tire very very easily and that would be hard on you. I think it would be best if you had someone stay with you for a while, or keep the children