I am going home next week to home wife and unfortunately MIL

Bob,

Mary has given you some great advice and I agree with her. Having this new information, including the bit about your FIL, is very telling. I know this is probably all hard for you to see since you're caught up in the middle of it. Please listen to your minister. He has the objectivity you need right now in order to get through this. I am so sad you have to deal with this along with your recovery from surgery. I think it's interesting and so telling that your MIL would not attend a family meeting. She does know she is the problem but will never own up to it or change. Hopefully you can get her on a plane and out of your life soon. Know that we are all pulling for you.

Sue

Bob--you did the right thing...like it was already said, you have to let your wife and MIL deal with it right now...there isn't anything else you can do.

Please focus on your healing! You are most important to yourself right now...just think recovery!

I also found the FIL's disinterest VERY interesting...from an outsiders view, that is the way he's kept his sanity all these years. Is he friendly with you? maybe you can have some "non-family" conversations to break up the day!

My condolences to you and your wife on the loss of your beloved bird. I know that animals can be a big part of a family and the loss (no matter how large or small) can leave an empty space.